We’re finally in the home stretch of this season. After tonight, there will only be three more episodes of the show. While the activity in the house has slowed WAY down, there are a lot of events that must be squeezed into these last hours. Tonight, we’ll get a HOH competition, a Pandora’s Box, and nominations. Yes, you heard me right – ANOTHER Pandora’s Box. Trust me, while tonight’s Pandora does little to affect the game, it will be even more annoying than the nullification of Porsche’s HOH that was the result of her opening it.
Tonight the show kicks into gear with the “gooey doughnut” HOH competition that was still in progress as Thursday’s show went off the air. There’s no real reason to recap this. The goo was tough to get through, especially for Kalia. Adam initially kept up, but Rachel jumped way ahead and won! Oh yea, and everybody at some point said it is the most important HOH of the season. One more thing, Adam is extremely pissed that Kalia voted against him. Oh yes, and Rachel’s HOH victory was “for Brennnnnon!” Ugh.
After a commercial break, Rachel and Jordan celebrate in the storage room. Rachel is excited about whatever deals may come their way, and Jordan says that they HAVE to separate Porsche and Kalia. Rachel responds that she can’t make any deal with Kalia because she would vote her out the next week. “We need Adam to work with us.”
Adam is now in the bathroom, and a showering Kalia wants his attention. She apologizes for her vote against him, explaining that she believed she was voting with the house. He says that it’s “all good”, and Kalia explains that the “last thing I need is one more enemy in the house”. Adam responds in the diary room that “her word to me means nothing”.
He’s now in the bedroom still stewing over Kalia’s vote, and Porsche walks in and tells him she’s glad he survived. Porsche says that she wants two noobs in the end so that the voting “is based on play”. He asks her if she thinks Rachel is just going to put up her and Kalia, and Porsche agrees.
Kalia is now seen snoring in the bedroom as Rachel leaps out of the diary room with her HOH key. Everybody gathers but Kalia is still sleeping, which makes Rachel (and the viewers) laugh at how that’s all she does. Yes, Rachel, we know your HOH room is “amazing”, especially with all of your pictures of you and Brennnnon! Hey Kalia, you’re not exactly a fashion model yourself, so don’t be dogging Adam on his looks. God, I hate this weekly segment!
Uh oh, now it’s time for Kalia to talk to Rachel. She complains that she has never lied to anybody, and has (like Rachel) battled so hard the entire season. Really? I sat through this 45-minute speech the other night, and even in a shortened version it is hard to keep my eyes open. Rachel’s only response is that she “want to play with competitors. I think it’s a travesty that Brennnnon, Daniele, and Jeff are in the jury house.” This actually shuts up Kalia for a few seconds, and her only response is that she’s “really scared”. Rachel asks if she would take her and Jordan over Porsche to the final three. Of course, Kalia says she would. She’ll say anything to survive. In the diary room, Rachel adds to the hype by saying it’s the “most important decision I’ve ever had to make in the Big Brother house so far”. Nice script reading!
After another commercial break, Jordan and Rachel are filling airtime by talking about what they’re going to do after the show is over. Wake me when this segment is over, especially as Rachel talks about car insurance.
With that segment finally over, it is time for Porsche to grovel. She asks Rachel what she needs to make it further, and Rachel explains that she needs somebody she can trust. “I just don’t know who to trust.” When Porsche doesn’t exactly give a glowing answer to Rachel’s query, Rachel whines a bit about how she thought the two of them could have been a team throughout the entire season. Porsche says if she wants to start working together, she will promise not to nominate her next week. In the diary room, Porsche admits that this is not entirely true but she’ll say whatever she needs to make it through the week.
More filler, as Jordan is asking Adam about his girlfriend, Farah. Yeah, this is sickening, especially when Adam says his girl doesn’t like being called Donna Martin in bed. Yes, he really did say that! We then get a flashback montage of Adam’s obsession with Tori Spelling. Can you guess what this is leading up to? Jordan says in the diary room that her advice to Tori would be to run if she ever saw Adam.
Sure enough, Rachel heads into her HOH to discover another Pandora’s Box! After reading the first card, Tori Spelling is shown on the HOH room’s television. Not only is she waving, but there are a bunch of clothing racks behind her, and somehow Rachel is able to observe that she “has a wedding show!” What? Oh yeah, it’s a Grodner script.
Rachel opens the second card which says the only thing better than a visit from a celebrity is a shopping spree with a celebrity! But remember – “with every temptation comes a consequence”. Rachel claims that unless it was a Brennnon reunion she can’t open it. Well, after more scripted thoughts she finally does open it…as we go to commercials.
When we get back to the show, Rachel walks into the Pandora room to find…Jesse!!! Ugh!!! Rachel gets a celebrity shopping spree with Mr. Pectacular! Rachel is pissed. “He is not a celebrity!” Not only is Jesse in the room with Jesse merchandise, he’s wearing a speedo! Well, not quite a speedo but too close for my taste. Gross!
Meanwhile, downstairs Adam walks into another room saying “wake me if something exciting happens”. He’s even pantsless when the doorbell rings. Jordan waits for him to zip up before answering the door, and as you may expect it is Tori Spelling! Yeah, Adam goes nuts as the least deserving player in Big Brother history gets his own prize!
Kalia tells Tori that Adam is obsessed with her, and she says “I might have heard something about that”. Poor girl. Tori says her baby is due in a month and a half, and “if it’s a boy I’m naming him Adam”. Oh please.
They show Tori around the house as Jesse shows Rachel his merchandise. She gets to see Tori on the monitors, and freaks out. Adam shows Tori his duck, and she kisses it. My God, the diary room stuff from Adam is as awful as expected! Ugh, he even tells her the story about calling his girlfriend Donna Martin while lying in bed. Jordan is mortified! Both “couples” get pictures taken, but obviously Adam is more excited about this than Rachel.
Tori then announces the shopping spree for the guests, which is the typical game of throwing on as many clothes as possible in three minutes. Tori then leaves, and they all head outside for this luxury task. Thankfully, this also means that Porsche will no longer have to wear the same two pairs of sweats for her final days in the house. Rachel is beyond bummed as she watches them gather clothes while Jesse blathers on. “Porsche doesn’t even deserve this!” Jesse finally leaves, and Rachel heads downstairs with her Jesse gear. “I hate you all!” She informs them of being stuck with Jesse, and Adam thanks her.
Frivolous time over, Adam heads upstairs to talk to Jordan and Rachel. Adam does the only thing he knows how to do…grovel. He apologizes for turning his back on them last week, but says he wants “to play with people who respect the game, and I really don’t think they do”. He wants to go to the final three with them, and Rachel says she doesn’t know what she’s going to do. He says that those two (Porsche and Kalia) must go up this week so they can’t save each other. Rachel is conflicted, though, as she abhors the idea of keeping a weak player like Adam…but at the same time she acknowledges that keeping somebody she knows she can beat is a good option. “If there’s any weak player in the hosue, it’s definitely Adam.”
Adam leaves, and Rachel and Jordan both agree they want to be final two with each other. “I refuse…refuse to let two people be in the final two that slept this whole season.” Rachel agrees, and laughs about Kalia’s “competitor speech”. Yeah, Rachel, we all do. “We already got tricked by Shelly”, advises Jordan. “We can’t get tricked by other people.”
Although a superlong commercial break had me holding the clicker in my hands, I didn’t make the change. It’s finally time for Rachel to make her nominations, and after everybody does their contracturally-obligated poses and script reading Rachel calls everybody into the house. Jordan’s key is pulled out first, followed by Adam. Kalia and Porsche are nominated, and Rachel says it is because they nominated her. “May the best man…I mean woman…or man win.”
Porsche claims that she is the strongest competitor in the house besides her (well, I guess that could be true), and after winning the veto she is going to come after Rachel next week. Kalia says she expected the nomination – “payback is a bitch named Rachel”. Rachel says she’s not scared of either of them, and says “the game didn’t start on day 55”.
So there it is – the last Sunday episode of the season. What did you think of tonight’s show? Were you excited or dismayed at the sight of Jesse? Or Tori Spelling? Or Adam’s story of calling his girlfriend Donna Martin in bed? Did Rachel make the right move in nominating Porsche and Kalia? Let us know what you think!