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Sunday
Jul282013

Big Brother Season 15, Episode 14 Recap

Tonight’s episode should be pretty basic and lackluster. Covering the 24 hours after Arryn’s dramatic HOH victory, there will be just a little bit of shuffling and gaming. Since Arryn quicly acquiesced to the promises she made earlier in the week, the real focus tonight will be filler segments and the Have-Not competition.

So we start off tonight with a look back at Kaitlin’s departure. Arryn is happy that she succeeded in staying. “I’m extremely proud to have figured out a way to get the majority of people on my side after pretty much being on the bottom of the barrel.” Helen hopes that Arryn holds up her side of the bargain, and accurately reads CBS’s cliche of the night. “I hope I didn’t just make a deal with the devil.” Elissa is not happy, and slowly drawls how the pressure of the house made her vote out Kaitlin. Howard echoes a similar thought, but more succinctly.

Andy then gets his token, and much desired, spot on the episode, babbling about how Kaitlin set a record in leaving after her eviction. “I’m sure that Jeremy is waiting with open arms on his boat.”

We then move to the HOH competition, and Elissa’s futile effort to beat Arryn. “I went from being on the bottom of the barrel to the tip top of the mountain”, she sort of exclaims. GinaMarie shows the real enthusiasm, but she’s virtually impossible to understand as she goes on about her “BB bunny”. There’s also a funny shot as Arryn hugs everybody, but her and Elissa both avoid the uncomfortable moment. Elissa is “speechless”, and the world is thankful.

Helen, though, is worried that Arryn won’t stand up to her promise to put up Howard and Spencer. We get a shot from earlier in the week of them shaking on this deal before moving on to Candice saying “I just want to throw up. Are you serious?”

Arryn and Jessie head into the bathroom to celebrate, and Jessie says she has to play like they’re best friends this week. Meanwhile, Candice is straddling Howard, complaining that her and Elissa will probably be put up. Howard says they’re just going to have to “kiss butt”. Candice also knows about the “game-changing deal”, and we get another shot back in time as Jessie informs her of the deal. She tells Howard, and he promises not to tell anybody.

Spencer is now shown talking to Arryn. He wants to make a deal, but she says she has to wait to hear from the house. She tells him that she doesn’t want him to go home, and says she respects him. She also says she’s under pressure to put up Howard, but doesn’t really want to do that. She has no alliance, so she has to make people happy. This pisses Spencer off, but he still looks at her ass in the final shot.

Helen now grabs Arryn and pulls her into the storage room. Helen congratulates her, and then tells her that Candice knows about their deal. We get another shot from the past as Candice asks Helen about that a few minutes before the eviction. Helen complains that Candice was “threatening” her, but she clearly wasn’t. They both know that it was Elissa who informed Candice, and Helen is furious. Maybe putting Elissa up isn’t a bad idea, and while not against it, Helen says her name has to be out of that conversation.

Elissa and Candice are now complaining about Arryn, who conveniently walks in. Elissa gives her pure glaring looks through the mirror as Arryn wanders around the kitchen. Arryn complains in the diary room how Elissa makes it harder on herself. She did, after all, promise to not put her up. she could at least try to be cordial. Yeah, right.

Fluff time, as the “who wants to see my HOH room” music comes on. Everybody is hiding from Arryn, though, which at least adds another little twist to a boring segment. They finally go in, and there are laughs and fake cheer. Zzzzzzzz! Oops, there is one moment of awkwardness as Arryn complains that Candice has her saying “aks” instead of “ask”. Oh boy.

Helen is now holding court in the cockpit room, telling Judd, McCrae, and Amanda about Candice knowing the Arryn deal. She’s pissed at Elissa! “I hate to say this, but we have to get her out.” Yeah, right.

Fluff time, as we now watch the burgeoning relationship between McCrae and Amanda. Seriously, while I like her I don’t need this garbage.

Spencer now heads up into the HOH for his official “kiss the ring” moment with Arryn. He wants to “defend” himself to her, and says that if he wins HOH he would not have put her up. Arryn doesn’t believe it, but Spencer says that the house needs to have a “power shift”. Again, Arryn says that to save herself last week she had to make deals she didn’t want to make. Spencer rebuts this idea of a HOH that is nothing more than to gain protection, and he doesn’t believe he’ll be safe after this week. “There are other people in the house that can give you more protection”, he says. “I’m not mad at you...yet.”

It’s Howard’s turn to state his case, and he complains about the “lies” that are coming out about himself and Candice. She then tells him about what Candice has been saying about her deal with Helen, but confirms that she has to do what they say. She claims that she doesn’t want to put After commercials, it is time for a CBS tie-in competition. Sirens scream, and everybody runs to the living room. Somebody named Poppy Montgomery, from an unknown CBS show that just happens to be premiering tonight, is on the screen. Andy claims he knows who she is (“she’s a ginger”), but it’s doubtful anybody else does. She introduces the Have-Not competition, and they head outside.

It’s a police station motif, and after a scripted quip from Judd, this Poppy person gives them their instructions. It’s a two-part competition, and I don’t really care. Sorry, folks, but I never recap what happens. It’s always the same. Diary room stuff is nothing but how they don’t want to be Have-Nots, and reading the rules over and over. The results are that this week’s Have-Nots are Amanda, Judd, Candice...and GINAMARIE!!! Finally, she has to move out of the bed she shared with Nick TWO WEEKS AGO!!!

When we return to the show, it’s more fluff. Elissa is doing stretches, and complaining that there is no gym. Jessie, who is also in the room, doesn’t respond. We get more shots of Elissa stretching and doing yoga throughout the house. “I’ll do it anywhere.” Ugh, why? Why?

Silliness over, Candice is again complaining to Howard. He thinks that they have a chance to save the game, and that if she has something to say she should say it. Wait, what? You’re the one who has been telling her to keep quiet! They want to force Arryn to put up Amanda and McCrae. “Go take your bed”, he says. “Now you can go get your bed.” Perfectly dramatic moment, Big Brother editors.

So Candice does just that, but I have to interject here. This conversation I’m about to recap actually took place way earlier. It happened before the Have-Not competition. It happened before her conversations with Spencer and Howard. Hours earlier, in fact. It was so early in the day that most feed watchers didn’t see it.

Candice then comes into the HOH, where Arryn is in the bathroom brushing her teeth. She sits down and complains about how “certain people are running the house”, and that this is a crucal week that should result in a big move. Arryn counters that she has “to make the most amount of people happy”. She adds that she doesn’t want to put up Howard, but a lot of people aren’t happy with him. Candice pleads with her to break up Amanda and McCrae, but Arryn won’t even consider that as she is the main person who has helped her. Candice claims that Amanda is actually working to put her up next week, but Arryn says she has a “Candice switch” and she doesn’t really pay any attention to what she says.

Candice heads back downstairs and tells Howard that she won’t put up Amanda and McCrae. She believes they’re both going on the block, and Howard says that’s not how it sounded last night. Candice is now upset that she may have taken the heat off him and onto her. “That’s fine, Howie. Whatever. Have a great life. Whatever happens, happens.” Yes, she feels used. He asks if she thinks he’s running a game on her, and she backs away from him. “Let’s just not talk about it.” She wants him to leave her alone, and he walks off.

Andy is now upstairs with Arryn and a number of others, pushing for Howard and Spencer to be put up. Arryn says she is considering putting up Elissa, but Andy says she can’t. “Howard and Spencer are such schemers”, he says. Andy walks out, and Arryn complains how stressful it is to be in this position. Jessie says she’ll be completely supportive of whatever she wants to do, including putting up Elissa. Arryn complains that she’s not a “direct target” of either of those men, but she always will be Elissa’s main target. Jessie counsels that she should do what is best for her game, not the house’s game. (It’s interesting how they’re making it sound like there was ever this kind of deep thought about going after Elissa.)

The hour is almost up, so it’s time for the moment of truth. Arryn still makes it sound like Elissa is a possibility, and brings in everybody for the ceremony. The first key she pulls belongs to GinaMarie, and is then followed by Jessie, Andy, Elissa (who gives a weird look), Candice, Helen, McCrae, Amanda, and Judd. Yes, Howard and Spencer are nominated!

Arryn says it’s “nothing personal”, and it’s what is “best for my game”. The show then ends with Howard and Spencer both saying that it’s not over yet for them. Elissa, meanwhile, is “shocked”! Helen is happy that Arryn stuck to her deal, but reminds us that MVP could screw up the whole plan.

So that’s it! What did you think tonight? Should she have put up Elissa? Or anybody else? And who is Poppy Montgomery? What are your thoughts?

 

Thursday
Jul252013

Big Brother Season 15, Episode 13 Recap

Three mean girls - two racists and one loud-mouthed sex machine. One of them is going home, but which one? Live feeders know the answer, but there is certainly a case for any of them.

The real mean girl of the series, however, is safe. Just like last night, I have a feeling her true colors are going to be shown once again. Yesterday, she had two major incidents, and one of them is most definitely going to be used for the opening “let’s create some eviction doubt” video package.

Let’s go right to the show with the replacement of Elissa with GinaMarie. Oh wait, Julie has to explain that Arryn won that third nominee spot in a landslide, so that’s how Elissa, and then GInaMarie, went up (like we didn’t know that already). GinaMarie doesn’t know who the MVP is, but “i daught people liked me but obviously MVP BB doesn’t like me do that’s why I am up.” Did you follow that?

Kaitlin is bummed to be next to two good friends, but she has been told that she is just a pawn. “If I go scramble for votes, it’s just going to make me look super paranoid.” Arryn says she’s going to have to pull out a “magic trick” to get some votes as the biggest target in the house.

She is now upstairs making her case, complaining to Judd and Jessie about how GinaMarie is so negative. In the diary room, she says her work this week is going to be tougher, and she promises that she’ll never put up Judd or Jessie. Now Judd is reconsidering his promise to Kaitlin. They go over just how good Kaitlin has been in recent competitions.

Of course, Helen pops her head in. Arryn then leaves, and she says that her and Elissa (who is right behind her) needs to know how to vote. Judd makes the case that every week Arryn wil go up, and Kaitlin is a stronger competitor.

Elissa isn’t happy about this. “My opinion is Elissa all day, and every day...Arryn affects my game because she’s constantly talking about me.” Ugh, really? She also says that it affects Candice and Howard’s game, but Jessie says that’s exactly why they should keep her.

Speaking of Candice and Howard, they’re laying around in the cockpit, and Judd comes in to talk about who to evict. Judd repeats the “awesome competitor” line, but Candice says “her mouth is so potent”. Judd says that both her and Elissa need to put the personal thing to the side, and Howard says it’s 50/50 on what he wants to do.

Arryn is now talking to Helen about earning Elissa’s trust. She’ll basically do whatever she wants, and Helen says it “may be a deal too good to pass up”. Helne pulls Elissa into the storage room, but Elissa doesn’t believe her. “Arryn says stupid about me, but I can’t get that she has made derogatory racial comments.” Helen says that Elissa needs to look at who is more dangerous to their game. In the diary room, Elissa says she “just can’t support mean girls”. So she doesn’t support herself?

It’s now morning, and Judd calls over Helen to talk to him and Jessie. Andy joins them, and Helen says that nobody can tell Spencer or Howard the deal. “They’ll ultimately do what I want to do”, he says, and then tells Helen about their other alliance. It’s fake, though, he says. “They think it’s real.” Helen is shocked, shocked, shocked. How dare she try to start an alliance! Really?

After commercials, we go to Helen talking to Elissa and Amanda about that five-person alliance. Again, this shows how devious that little Kaitlin is. They have to keep this knowledge a secret, though.

We now see Arryn in the bathroom, and Elissa and Kaitlin are in the kitchen. Elissa doesn’t do what Helen requested. Instead, she comes right out and asks Kaitlin if she had made a deal with Spencer and Howard. Kaitlin denies it, and Elissa pokes and prods her some more. “I would rather you stay than Arryn.” We see Arryn craning her head around, listening.

For more detailed coverage of this incident, please read what Mike, Ash, and I all wrote yesterday about this. You really can’t pull two hours of bitching into a five minute segment, but let’s just say that Helen and others are pissed at Elissa. The only good thing that comes out of it is that once again Elissa is finally being exposed on CBS as the real bitch that she is. I mean, come on, I’m feeling bad for a racist! Howard does his diary room job by saying that maybe he’ll have to vote against Arryn after all!

It’s now time to talk to the house. Julie starts by telling Judd that twitter is “abuzz” about his stupid bear shirt. Judd says that he’s not wearing it tonight because it’s in the wash, and Julie says that maybe she’ll wear it next week. Yeah, right.

McCrae gets the next question after being told happy birthday. Julie wants to know if he’ll ever be able to top this year’s celebration. He babbles about how being in the house is a dream come true. Julie brings up the frozen yogurt competition, especially GinaMarie’s deep throating the machine. GinaMarie is asked about how bad that tasted, and I have no idea what she says. “I took one for the team, Julie. I took one for the team.”

It’s final plea time, and Arryn goes first. She says that she wants to stay in the house, and has learned a lot from everybody. Kaitlin thanks her family and friends, and that it’s been great to get to know everybody. GinaMarie is last, and again thanks everybody. “I have a big heart, and a bad accent.” She rambles on, and throws a kiss to Nick.

Voting time, and Amanda votes to evict Kaitlin, as does McCrae, Helen, Candice, Elissa (sadly, sadly, sadly), Spencer, Howard, Andy, and Jessie. Yes, it’s unanimous!

There’s another commercial break, and then Julie breaks the news that Kaitlin is evicted. Helen gets up to hug her, but Kaitlin brushes past everybody to get to the door. She does give GinaMarie a hug, and is gone!

Just like last week, the house is pretty calm post-eviction. They all just stare at the wall waiting for it to go black, and then it goes to Julie and Kaitlin. Julie asks why she sprinted out without hugs, and Kaitlin complains “everybody lied to my face”. She was a little bit shocked it was unanimous, but says she’s not necessarily mad at anybody. She says that she is hurt the most by Andy.

Julie wants to know why she went from pawn to evictee, and Kaitlin responds that obviously people saw her as a bigger threat...and the company she kept didn’t help either. Julie then informs her that the public is calling the three of them the “mean girls”. She says that she thought she was nice to everybody, but “I did align with some catty girls”. Julie adds that people feel Arryn was the leader, “especially the night she flipped over Candice’s mattress”, and she was a part of it. Kaitlin says Arryn’s actions rubbed off on her, and that she has some regrets.

The interview ends with a Jeremy question, and Kaitlin says she “has no clue” if they’re going to see each other. “I’m going to Vegas.” Is Jeremy invited? “He can do what he wants.”

We end with the messages from the house, and Helen apologizes (of course), but “Arryn gave us a deal we couldn’t resist.” Candice says she’s “super beautiful and sweet”, and says that it was because of Jeremy she is probably is gone. Judd says she’s “hot as hell”, and wishes he could have worked with her a little sooner. Arryn says she can’t wait to meet her after the season is over.

With Kaitlin gone, it’s now HOH comp time. It’s called “Roulette Me Win”, and they get to roll a ball onto a roulette wheel. The player with the highest score is the next HOH.

Andy is up first, and rolls a 23. McCrae then rolls a 28 to beat him. GinaMarie’s score is 3! Bwahahahaha! Candice then rolls a 27, and Spencer takes the lead with 34! Arryn is next, and she hits a 36 to take the lead! It’s the highest score possible! Howard then rolls, and hits 17. Jessie then gets a 2, Helen hits 28, Amanda gets 1, and Elissa is one slot short and gets a 0! Arryn is the new HOH! Wow! Funny how there is no celebration afterwards!

Julie then says the public is again voting for the third nominee, and promises a Jeff interview to end the show. Something that I won't sit through, of course!

So that’s it for tonight! What did you think of the episode? Are you shocked that Kaitlin is gone? Or that Arryn won HOH? Tell us what you think!

 

Wednesday
Jul242013

Big Brother Season 15, Episode 12 Recap

There is one reason to watch tonight’s episode. Sometime early in the hour, probably around the twelve-to-fifteen minute mark, an event will happen that needs to be paused. You’re going to see a certain person’s face have an inner fight. The rigidity of chemicals and surgery is going to go to battle with a rare moment of emotion. Who will win? Modern cosmetic procedures or the natural elastic of skin?

There will be some other fun on the show tonight...or at least events that I’ll call fun, but we’ll start off where we left off on Sunday with the nominations of Kaitlin and Arryn. Judd thinks that his noms are pretty safe, except that Amanda isn’t happy. He’s just worried that he’ll put a target on his back for next week. Howard is “elated, but still a little nervous”. He notes that all of the strong males have left the house. Aaryn again complains about the “Texas Tornado” comment, and hates that she’s been made to look “sketchy in front of the whole house”.

She heads upstairs, where Judd is talking to Spencer, who leaves the room. She says that she’s not mad, but tears up when asking about that phrase. Her composure changes, though, when Judd tells her not to cry because his plan is to win veto, take either her or Kaitlin off the block, and then backdoor somebody. She promises not to tell anybody about this idea. Judd says, “act mad, act mad, act mad” as seh leaves the room.

Kaitlin is downstairs complaining to Amanda that if Arryn wins veto then she may be going home. She asks Amanda if she’ll tell her if she’s in danger, and after a moment of hesitation, Amanda says yes. Kaitlin says she doesn’t trust anybody in the house, and also doesn’t think anybody would tell her if she was a target. Arryn walks into the room, complaining that Judd was laughing as she was talking to him. Amanda attempts to reassure her, as she really does want Howard to be backdoored.

It’s now time for some whining. Elissa is asking about the MVP, because “every week about this same time, I’ve been finding out that I’m MVP. This week, it hasn’t happened. It’s so nervewracking.” She heads into the HOH, and is acting way weird. Amanda says she’s “acting like a woman who just found out she’s pregnant”, and attempts to get her to talk. She even does a perfect imitation of how she came into the room. Amanda then asks if she won MVP, and Elissa says no. “I just think I’ll go up if I don’t, hmmm mmmm.” In the diary room, Elissa acknowledges that people have been using her for the MVP, and if that’s not in play she’s in trouble.

McCrae and Amanda are now in the cockpit room, and after a kiss she tells him just how weird Elissa has been acting. She says she doesn’t understand her, and agrees that without the MVP there’s no use for her. McCrae even says she could possibly be backdoored by Judd.

Now Spencer and Howard are playing pool, complaining about Amanda. “I don’t feel good about them at all”, says Spencer. They think they’re going to run the house, and proceed to say their way to succeed is to “go with the house”. Kaitlin is their key, though, and they decide they need to get her and Judd to work with them. Oh yeah, and GinaMarie, too. “We’re still the Moving Company, baby”, says Spencer.

They head up to the HOH, and after Judd and Kaitlin walk in (GinaMarie was already there), they start in to some small talk about the MVP. “Helen and Elissa run this house”, complains Kaitlin. “Along with Amanda and McCrae”, counters Spencer. Howard says he has a plan, and goes into a chat about how they’ve all been “ostracized” from the house. GinaMarie is immediately all in, pretty much saying “preach it, brother” after everything that is said. Spencer laughs in the diary room that Howard is preaching nonsense, but it’s working with these dupes. “I’m ready to fucking play”, says GinaMarie. They slap fists to verify it’s on, baby!

After commercials, a number of people are talking about the MVP. Helen says that Elissa doesn’t have it, and maybe “America” is picking the nominee this week. “It gets America in the game.” Jessie is confused, though, and Helen believes the two nominees would have received the most votes.

So now we have the time I’ve been waiting for. Judd reads the card about the third nominee, who is....ELISSA!!!! The entire house is shocked! Shocked, I tell you! “Something weird is going on”, complains Candice. Elissa says she felt “betrayed...it’s a stab in the back!” Players for the veto are now picked, and they are Helen and McCrae, with Andy as the host.

With the meeting adjourned, Arryn actually complains that having her “worst enemy in the house” on the block with her is a bad thing. She’s worried that people may actually think that it was her that put up Elissa.

Amanda goes up to hug Elissa, who clearly doesn’t want her to be touched. She believes that it was either Kaitlin, GInaMarie, or Arryn who put her up, as “those are the only three girls I’m not close with”. GinaMarie goes up to hug her, and Elissa completely recoils. “Please stop!”

Elissa wanders into one of the bedroom, and GinaMarie follows her to find out why she was just treated like that. “You put me up.” GinaMarie swears on her life that she is not responsible, so Elissa then says that surely the other two girls told her this was going to happen. GinaMarie grabs Elissa’s Bible to swear on it, but Elissa says that’s disrespectful. “I just really want to go home. Just vote me out.” Candice pulls her out of the room into another bedroom, where Elissa continues to complain about how this isn’t fun. Candice reminds her that her sister also always had to fight to survive (kind of a myth).

At the same time, Arryn walks into the cockpit room and informs Amanda that she has to win the veto, as everybody is going to blame her for Elissa’s nomination. “If I’m on the block,, I’m going home.” Amanda says that it has to be something to do with a twist, and Arryn says that maybe Elissa put herself up.

GinaMarie now heads upstairs to inform Judd and Kaitlin that Elissa believes she put her up. If she had, she says, she would be jumping up and down. Kaitlin thinks this might be an act. “By putting herself up, it would prove to people that she’s not MVP this week.”

When we return from commercials, it is veto competition time. There are voting booths and a mud pit. To “earn” votes, they have to roll in the mud to find envelopes with a numerical tally of votes. The most votes wins veto, and there are other “prizes” attached to some ballots - both good and bad.

There’s no reason to recap everything that happens. Three or four people read the rules, there’s lots of laughter about the rolling in the mud, blah blah blah. “I just have to get down and dirty.” Yeah, you get the picture.

With the game finally over, we get the results. Helen goes first, and she has 29 votes, plus a 8 pm curfew for two nights (thank god). Kaitlin is next, and she has 25 votes. McCrae’s total is 20, but he also won five thousand bucks! Arryn’s total is 32, taking the lead from Helen. Judd also takes the lead with 38 votes, and a day of solitary confinement. It’s now all up to Elissa, and I think you know what happens here. She has 40 points, but can’t play in the next veto competition. Yes, the evil witch has just saved herself! GinaMarie says she better watch her ass next week, though! Now the paranoia starts again about the MVP!

After more commercials, Judd gives us a tour of his solitary confinement room. He says it’s going to be hell, but I believe he actually likes it. Helen then puts on her cute mom face to describe the 8 pm curfew. Worse, she’s starting to yell in the diary room like Dan did last year. Knock it off!

Meanwhile, it is McCrae’s birthday, and Amanda is getting all decked out to give him a special dance. She’s wearing a one-piece bathing suit, and Elissa wants to know whose it is. “Mine”, replies Amanda. “You brought a one-piece? Who are you?” Oh boy. Elissa continues to make catty jabs about how nobody wears one-pieces, but Amanda says she’s going to take them as compliments. “Mmmmmhmmmm, you look like you work at a strip club.”

Amanda and the crew head upstairs to celebrate, and McCrae couldn’t be more thrilled. Even before it happens, Elissa is complaining that “this is getting really risque”. Um, no, it hasn’t. Amanda then comes in, and everybody (but Elissa) cheers as Amanda spanks him. McCrae says that it was the best birthday ever, but Elissa continues to complain about how tasteless she was. Again, she bitches about the one-piece. Somebody mentions that Amanda should lick whip cream off McCrae, and Elissa bitches that will make her vomit. “It’s pretty frickin’ gross.” Really, bitch?

Amanda gets up and heads downstairs to cry alone. “She plays herself off as this good Christian girl, but she’s just nasty.” McCrae heads downstairs to console her, and tells her that the problem was that she got more attention than Elissa. What especially pisses off Amanda is that they had helped her when others had been mean.

Thankfully, there are now commercials, and when we get back Judd is still dealing with the solitary confinement (they had intercut shots of him during the last segments). Finally, it was time for him to get out, and everybody hugged him and he downed a beer and pizza.

It’s now veto ceremony time, and Elissa heads into the room to stare at the veto wall. Why, I dno’t know, as she has no say on the veto except to take herself down. Which, obviously, she does. They all look at the wall, and after an extended delay we find out the new nominee is...GinaMarie!

Howard is obviously happy with this new move. “Let the games begin.” Arryn still believes that Elissa is the MVP, as does Kristin. GinaMarie ends the show with some nonsense that I don’t have the time to translate.

So that’s it. Do you Elissa fans still believe she’s a wonderful woman? isn’t she the cattiest bitch in Big Brother history? Go ahead and complain about these statements. I can take it. Please comment.

 

Monday
Jul222013

A Day In The Life Of: Aaryn

Today should be interesting, as I’m going to follow around America’s favorite racist. I should have done this profile earlier in the season, though, as she’s been almost forgotten the last few days. It’s now almost assumed that she will be nominated every week, but last week there was a much bigger fish to fry.

This week may be different, although there are some cracks in the foundation that may result in one of a handful of others that see Julie Chen on Thursday. It’s doubtful in my mind that this will actually happen, and it will ultimately depend on the next person down the list on America’s nominee voting.

It’s a lazy day in Big Brother, as the house had a late-night that saw Aaryn actually fight against some of the charges against her. Insanely fight, of course, but she seems to be perplexed why people want her gone. Like I said, she insanely debated the charges.

Anyway, it’s a quiet morning, except for the plop plop fizz fizz of Helen’s feet as she jogs around the house. Why somebody who is trying to sleep doesn’t get up and yell at her for being so inconsiderate is beyond me, but we don’t see Aaryn at all until after 12:30. In the meantime, Helen has gathered the troops into another gigantic alliance that will last until the next giant alliance. What’s strange is that she’s seen making small talk about Elissa, who is doing her usual passive/aggressive method of gaining knowledge she already knows. Aaryn doesn’t give her much as she continues to much down her cereal.

She putters around the kitchen or a bit before disappearing off camera. We do hear her a little bit later saying “good afternoon” to Judd, who is still stuck in solitary confinement. Instead, the cams either focus on Jessie cooking slop or Amanda and McCrae finally waking up (along with Helen blathering on for hours outside). This raises a question. Is CBS so fed up with Aaryn that they’re no longer giving us the tittilation of our little racist getting ready in the morning (I mean afternoon)? Is McCrae making a bed or Jessie stirring a pot more entertaining than watching a cute blonde girl go through her daily routine?

The camera does return to her as she sits silently in the living room. She does take Amanda aside and informs her that Elissa and Helen are spreading stories from last night. She’s pissed that she is now the person to blame for everything that ever happens in the house. Amanda doesn’t seem to care, though...for now.

Aaryn again disappears for a time, as there are more important things to show. Amanda versus Candice. Amanda versus Elissa. Helen’s interrogations and repeated descriptions of her curfew. At least various people show up to cheer up (or is it bother?) Judd during his solitary confinement.

She is then seen talking to McCrae about various topics, including the circumstances of her birth and her heart murmur. She then moves on to laundry as Helen continues to bore everybody with more of her chatter. She also suggests that Amanda and McCrae should clean up the HOH, but doesn’t get much of a reply.

As Helen holds court in the pool, Aaryn continues to work with the laundry before heading inside to sit around as Candice makes “slop balls”. There’s some babbling about self-help books, and “inflamed intestines”. Arryn claims to have once wanted to be a relationship counselor, but after reading a million books she realized that there is no correct answer. “It stirred me more away from relationships rather than being in them.” This explains a lot.

Ok, reverse my earlier complaint. We do get nonsense footage of Arryn fixing her hair, while GinaMarie is working on her extensions. Little is said by either of them. Kaitlin joins them, chowing down on some food like she’s a “Neandertall”, but the chat doesn’t improve. They complain how Candice is going around saying that they’ve all been talking trash about Elissa. “I’m jaded by it”, replies Aaryn. “I really don’t care anymore...I feel like I’ve been chastised to the point where I’m not fun anymore. I’m not even like me.”

The whining continues as Aaryn complains about how people portray themselves as victims. She does make a point, though, when she complains that Amanda ends up apologizing to the person, Elissa, who was making fun of her last night. GinaMarie finally tires of the conversation, and tells her she doesn’t give a fuck. They even snip at each a little before GinaMarie stomps off to have a bizarre conversation/confrontation with Elissa. While that goes down, Arryn plops herself on the floor to chat with Judd.

Once that ridiculous conversation is finished, GinaMarie reports everything that was said (or her version of it) to Amanda. Meanwhile, Aaryn is now having an argument with Kaitlin in the bathroom. Yes, it’s about that same conversation with Amanda last night. The MVP situation has EVERYBODY on edge, and Aaryn’s complaint is that the two of them are supposed to be friends, yet she went to Elissa to bitch about her. “It’s gameplay”, replies Kaitlin. They move their fight into the kitchen, where Amanda joins in. It’s really a silly she said/she said fight. “You’re playing into that whole word mistake thing”, Aaryn complains. Somebody explain what that means, please.

Kaitlin wanders off to complain about Arryn, which leaves GinaMarie to endure more of her whining. It’s really just the same stuff over and over, although it is funny when GinaMarie claims “I never talk shit. I don’t need to.” Really? Aaryn finally wanders off to report to Judd her latest complaints. “It’s killing me. It’s killing my game.” Poor Judd.

She’s then off camera for a time, as Howard and Candice play pool, while Kaitlin befriends the likes of Spencer, Helen, Andy, and Spencer. Yes, exciting.

I did then watch the CBS show with the feeds on in the background. The only thing of consequence that happened during that hour was that Judd was released from solitary confinement, and Aaryn was part of the welcoming committee that rewarded him with beer and pizza. She sits outside with him and a few others afterwards, and confides that she is finally learning how to stop talking. Finally, during the week you’re probably going home!

It’s now photo booth time, which is a good place for a break. It’s the same as always. They all participate, and it’s really boring as a viewer. Oh wait, they don’t. A couple of them do, and they most wander back to what they were already doing.

Aaryn wanders back outside, where Amanda and Judd are gossiping. Amanda’s rage is now against Kaitlin and her new alliance, which obviously is something that Aaryn is pleased to hear. Judd’s not really against this plan, or so he says.

Suddenly, she’s back in the bedroom with Kaitlin, but I can’t make out anything they’re whispering. GinaMarie barges in anyway, so Arryn decides to participate in the photo booth silliness.

A little later, she interrupts a very tense meeting in the HOH involving Spencer, McCrae, and Amanda. She exits pretty quickly and the talk carries on. She returns to Kaitlin and GinaMarie in the kitchen.

My patience is starting to wear thin as Arryn now gets in the hammock with GinaMarie and Kaitlin to continue her daily theme on mean people and lies. It’s the same stories over and over. Jessie breaks it up a bit by joining them, and the talk moves to slop and jewelry before she wanders off.

Thirty minutes later, she joins a number of people outside on the couch. Spencer is at his best, almost begging Jessie to take off her bra as he has a “secret alliance” with her nipples. Classy. The feeds don’t last long on this group, as Helen is again pontificating in the HOH, and Elissa is being her typical weird self in the kitchen. They do return to the group scene from time to time, and when it’s not minor items they’re discussing it does all go back to Elissa and how weird she is.

There is one major happening in the house this evening, and since it doesn’t involve Aaryn she’s hit and miss for quite some time. There’s a fake engagement between McCrae and Amanda, and GinaMarie shows her jealousy because she didn’t get such an event with Nick. Aaryn is one that attempts to talk her down, and there is also a funny moment where Aaryn compliments Elissa on a treat that she had made. Elissa ignores her.

After that, it’s a pretty calm night. Aaryn is more sociable than usual, and she even ends up in the same vicinity with people she normally spends little time with (Candice, etc.). There’s lots of homelife talk, but nothing really serious. The night ends with Aaryn sitting up in the HOH with Judd, Kaitlin, GinaMarie, and Spencer. The prime talk again is Elissa, and her strangeness.

So that’s it. A full day with the most hated woman in Big Brother history, and you know what? It wasn’t that much of a chore. She really has calmed down, and while she does have a tendency to whine, for the most part she’s no more self-absorbed than anybody else in the house.

Any thoughts on this piece? Should I have piled on with condemnation like every other Aaryn report? Tell us what you think.


 

Thursday
Jul182013

Big Brother Season 15, Episode 10 Recap

Tonight marks the end of a reign of terror. No longer will the house cower in fear, waiting for the next chip to fall. They’ll be able to act as they please; to hang around with anybody they want.

You probably are thinking right now that I’m referring to the departure of one of the nominees - Jeremy, Aaryn, or Spencer. Oh no, no, no. The person in question is the current HOH, Helen. For the next few days at least, the rest of the house will be free of scheduled activities, lectures about what America wants, or orders to NEVER EVER consider putting up the Royal Highness of any of her court. Or any of her court’s court. Or any hangers ons of the court.

It’s a night of celebration, even if I do believe we’ll be subjected to one last speech from her. I just know that this is the episode that they’ll reintroduce the HOH interview. Julie will toss her softballs, and then have to cut Helen off as she again wanders off on too many tangents about being a mother.

One piece of good news came out a bit before the show commenced. Apparently, there is going to be “big news”regarding the twist. Does that mean no more fixed MVP??? Please say yes, and please take that botox twit along with it!

I’m getting ahead of myself, though, so let’s go right to where we left off last night. As a result of a Romeo and Juliet version of Sophie’s Choice (or at least the CBS edit did), Kaitlin took herself down knowing that her replacement would be Jeremy.

Ugh Helen does her little victory dance in the diary room as she squeals in joy. “He’s finally leaving this house!” Kaitlin and Aaryn hug, and Aaryn says she’s going to “kiss some butts this week”. Kaitlin says she should feel thrilled, but she’s bummed that Jeremy is up. Jeremy, though, says “it’s not over until it’s over”. Yeah, it’s over.

Aaryn is now in the bathroom with Jeremy, who understands why he’s up but it “sucks because it’s so early”. For some reason, Aaryn tries to sound smart, talking about how it’s just like real life. Both Jeremy and her are being “discriminated against” because they’re pretty and are good at competitions. I can just see the glee in the Big Brother producer’s eyes as he captured that soundbyte. Just put your bikini on, little girl.

In the diary room, Jeremy admits that maybe he was a little bit too gung ho at the beginning, but now he’s going to do whatever it takes to save himself. First off, he’s dressed as a baby to show he’s actually fun. He thinks it “got into people’s hearts”.

While dressed as a baby, he attempts to woo the favor of McCrae and Amanda, who deadpans “I figured he either wanted to breast feed or campaign”. She plays it perfectly, by glancing at her breasts while saying, “thank God he was just looking for some votes”. Good girl.

Jeremy makes his plea, saying that he’d let the two of them make his next HOH picks if they save him. Judd is now with them, and he also says that he’ll think about it. Jeremy then does a handstand across the backyard.

Sexy music comes on as Aaryn starts doing some exercises in front of Jessie, Andy, GinaMarie, and Judd. Her plan is to show that she’s a fun person. She is then shown kissing up to various people, including Helen and Amanda. She even apologizes to Howard for “any comment” she may have made.

Finally, Aaryn walks into a room where people are talking about GinaMarie. “She is nuts”, says Amanda as we get another shot of her crying into Nick’s shorts. They talk about the collection of his garbage that she is treasuring, and decide to hide it. After gathering her stuff, GinaMarie discovers they’re all missing, and completely freaks out. She blames it on Aaryn, first with a smile that turns into dramatic tears. She wanders off and they all giggle. Amanda and McCrae return the items, telling her it’s just a joke. Aaryn is bummed that she didn’t take their fun as a joke.

Amanda then points out to McCrae that while Amanda was a bit of an instigator, she quickly pushed the blame onto them. “Fuck Aaryn”, says McCrae. “Bitch.” Maybe keeping Jeremy isn’t a bad idea after all.

On cue (or editor’s cue), Jeremy heads upstairs to grovel at Queen Helen’s feet. He says he’ll never go against her or Elissa (who is also in the room), and Helen says that he has to cast aside Kaitlin and Aaryn over the two of them. Yeah, right. Helen then says that his attitude has to completely change, and must protect Elissa and Helen. Anything else, Queen Helen? It’s a waste of time, but it gives CBS the footage needed to make it look like somebody else just may go home tonight.

After commercials, Julie addresses the house. Elissa gets the first question, asked if she is enjoying her first week not on the block. I honestly can’t understand her response. Candice is then asked about the events of last Thursday night. Candice replies that she has forgiven Aaryn. Kaitlin is asked how hard it was to take herself down, and the answer is what you’d expect. Howard is next, with a question about his religious beliefs. He replies that it’s hard to deal with the fact that lying is a part of the game, and that “I’m feeling better about it”.

Now we finally get a family portion of the show, and it is Amanda and McCrae’s folks! A bit of a disclaimer here. I’ follow Amanda’s dad and sister on twitter, and find them to be a treat. I’m not going to apologize for being a proud friend here. After some cutesy footage of the pair, we move to McCrae’s family cheering him on as he makes out with Amanda. His dad describes him as “unique”, and how he and his mother has been diehard fans for years.
Time to move on to the Zukerman’s. Her mom says that she has dated “quite a bit”, and all kinds. Her dad adds that she always gets what she wants. A little tiff is then shown between the pair, and Andy says they should get married. McCrae’s dad complains that Amanda “wears the pants” in their relationship. Amanda’s mom does hope there is more to McCrae than pizza delivery. A fun little segment.

More commercials before we move to the final pleas. Jeremy goes first, and he pretty much concedes that he’s a goner. He says that he played too hard, and throws in some reference to poop for some reason. Aaryn is next, and thanks her family but says she’ll respect any house decision. Spencer thanks a bunch of people, including Dave Grohl. Wait, what???

Voting then starts with Candice, who votes to evict Jeremy, as does Andy, Howard, and Elissa. Kaitlin, though, votes to evict Spencer as does GinaMarie. Wait, GinaMarie actually voted against Jeremy! Amanda also votes against Jeremy, as does McCrae (for eating the last pizza in the house), Jessie, and Judd. Jeremy is out 9- 0 -1!

We have to wait, though, before his eviction. Julie announces the vote, and Jeremy is up before she’s even done. He’s pretty calm, hugging everybody and saying “it’s nothing personal”. Saying “where’s my princess”, the last kiss and hug goes to Kaitlin. “Play hard”, he says as he walks out.

There’s no in-house craziness with this eviction, as they all calmly wait for Jeremy’s picture to go dark. We quickly return to Julie and Jeremy, who starts off by asking if his cockiness is why he’s gone. He says that everybody said he had to “calm down, but I’m a winner”. Even Julie thinks this is idiotic, but he says that because of Kaitlin he is walking out a different man. Julie goes on about the bully image, which Jeremy denies with some silliness about being big. God, he’s a moron. Julie won’t let the growing thing die, and we get more of this garbage about “working on his inside”.

Goodbye message time, and it starts with McCrae complaining about his arrogance. Elissa doesn’t have anything to say, which isn’t anything new. Helen does what she does best...lecture. Kaitlin then sadly says she can’t bear to deal without him, but she can’t wait to see him afterwards. Julie asks how excited he will be to see her afterwards, and he says “she better bring home the check”. Classy, dude.

I initially missed this, but I guess this week America is choosing a nominee instead of a MVP??? Wow, interesting. Vote Elissa!

With the eviction over, it’s time for the HOH competition. Earlier this week, there were questions on CBS.com where we were to pick which house guest were best described by a royal character (jester, queen, etc.) Well, kinda like that. More like “who is the queen of clumsiness” type of thing. It’s called “Big Brother Royalty”, Two names are read for each question, and you’re out if you get it wrong. Pretty much like last week’s competition, really.

The first question is about the “Earl of Egotism”, and everybody correctly picks Aaryn. The second question is the “Lord of Laziness”, and Andy, Amanda, Candice, and Elissa incorrectly choose Judd. The third question is the “Baron of Boneheads”, and they all correctly pick GinaMarie. Question four is the “Knight of Naughtiness”, and and everybody again correctly chooses Amanda. The next question is the “Duke of Dork”, and Aaryn, Jessie, and GinaMarie are now out. The last question is the “Sultan of Sexy”, and Howard and Spencer are now out.

It’s between Judd, Kaitlin, and McCrae for the tiebreaker. Julie asks how many gallons of milk would it take to fill the vats in the scary dairy competition. Kaitlin writes 410, Judd has 650, and McCrae has 600. Judd is the new HEAD OF HOUSEHOLD!!!! Fantastic!

Well, this week should be more entertaining, although I have a feeling he’s going to pay too much attention to the likes of Helen and Elissa. Maybe he’ll surprise us, though. At the very least, I’ll have new material for this week’s Big Brother Gossip Show.

Before we go, though, Julie announces the twist that the MVP is not to be what they think. "Expect the unexpected." Hey, it's better than having Elissa pick somebody!

What did you think? Are you happy that Jeremy is finally gone? Or that Judd is the new HOH? Or that Julie did NOT do the HOH interview segment? Tell us your thoughts!

 

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