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Entries in Episode Recap (107)

Wednesday
Aug082012

Big Brother #14, Episode 12 Recap

“How does it feel

To treat me like you do

When you’ve laid your hands upon me And told me who you are

I thought I was mistaken

I thought I heard your words

Tell me how do I feel

Tell me now how do I feel” – New Order, “Blue Monday”

From an album, Power Corruption and Lies, that could also be the title of tonight’s episode, “Blue Monday” was the breakout track for a band that before that moment lived in the shadows of their former incarnation, Joy Division. Ignored by music critics, this track made them international superstars.

While not nearly as talented as any member of this band, tonight’s episode is Danielle’s “Blue Monday”. Ignored by most of the house, and laughed at by the live feed viewers, the nurse/teacher/would-be Miss Alabama’s reign as HOH was seen by EVERYBODY as nothing more than an opportunity for others to do their dirty work under her name.

Yet tonight’s episode sees the girl with a thousand diseases take control of the house and use it to make the biggest move of the season so far. Sure, her reasoning was more catty than strategic, but tonight’s show does end with her accomplishing something that arguably nobody else would have dared attempted. The question remains, though, will this ultimately be a good move?

Before we get to the shocking conclusion, we have lots of filler to sit through, starting off with the reactions to Danielle’s nominations of Frank and Wil. For once, there is a funny comment in these diary room statements. “All good southern girls go to heaven”, says Wil, “but nasty southern belles go to hell.”

Danielle explains that Wil is just a pawn, because she wants Frank out the door. Frank, though, says he’s been “dodging bullets” all season, and just wants to save himself in the veto. “Then I’m going after Dan and Danielle.” Dan, though, just wants to keep the nominations the same.

Wil heads up into the diary room, where he hugs a crying Danielle. He says it is ok, but he is still worried as most pawns end up going home. He even tries to tell her it is a relief, as “I’m not really cut out for this game”. Danielle reassures him that everybody indeed loves him.

Frank and Boogie are now in their usual spot in the house, in the nomination chairs laughing at their misfortune. “I think it’s the hair, dog”, says Boogie. Beneath their jokes, Frank says he’s frustrated. They both complain about how they’re so over Danielle, Dan, and Janelle. Hell, they’re over everybody, actually. Adding to their paranoia, Boogie thinks there is a chance he’s being set up to be backdoored.

Now Janelle heads up to the HOH to supposedly use the bathroom, but instead whines to Dan about Boogie. We talked about this on last Saturday’s Big Brother Gossip Show, so there isn’t much need to go through this conversation…just like the next scene of Dan confronting Boogie about his attitude towards the other coaches.

After commercials, Ian comes into the HOH to talk to Danielle and Britney because he’s “feeling really alone...I’d like to be in one of the (groups)”. Britney asks if he would be willing to vote out Boogie at some point, and he says that he would do just that. Britney adds that he would have to be 100% committed to any group he adds, and she does admit in the diary room that she’s not completely sold.

Dan now joins the conversation, and says that he really likes Ian. “Are you truly reset and away from Team Boogie?” Ian admits that he does like Frank a lot. Truthfully, the conversation ends with little settled.

Time to pick veto players – Danielle pulls out Shane’s name, Frank gets Jenn, and Wil gets Ian. Boogie is not happy, as he is “basically alone”. Yes, Boogie’s other two players are in this event, but neither Ian or Jenn “have shown much competition prowess”. The host for the competition will be Dan.

Frank runs into Janelle in the bathroom, and asks her if she still believes he wants all the coaches out. A disinterested Janelle says she has no idea what he wants as they have never talked, but does follow up with that very question. She says that she “definitely wants to work with a strong player, as I have no one”. Silly Britney wanders downstairs and is shocked to see Janelle actually talking with the very person she wants out, and scampers back upstairs to tattle.

Oh how the tide has turned, as Danielle gets to jump back on the anti-Janelle bandwagon. “She infuriates me.” Dan is upset because he wants to unite all the coaches, and is pissed that Britney is making such a big deal about “one talk”.

It’s now veto competition time, and the backyard is in a baseball theme. Danielle’s panties are immediately wet because she thinks Shane looks “so cute” in a baseball uniform. “I hope I can focus on my game.” Please gag me with the fake relationship shit.

To play this game, a ball rolled down a ramp into a diamond-shaped structure. At the end of each round, the lowest score is out. They then get to go claim their prize, but future “losers” get to take whatever they have “won”. Yes, it is a variation of a comp that happens every single year.

Ian has decided that he is going to throw this comp, as he has no clue yet who he is working with. He then rolls a three, but Shane only gets a two. Jenn, who says she actually wants to win this game, rolls a nine, and Danielle gets a four. Wil ends the round with a six, which means that Shane is out in the first round. His prize is the veto, but at least he is smart enough to realize he won’t be holding onto it long.

In the second round, Ian scores a perfect twenty. Jenn gets a six, as does Danielle. Will nabs a five, while Frank hits a nine. Wil is now out, and his prize is a “veto ticket”, which guarantees that he plays next week. After a handful of Cracker Jacks, he does trade for the veto.

For the third round, Jenn gets a two, Danielle nabs a ten, and Frank’s score is a four. Ian’s roll if a five, which makes Jenn this round’s loser. Her prize is a Maui vacation, and she elects to keep it. Britney isn’t impressed.

Round four kicks off with a nine for Danielle and Frank, while Ian only gets a four. He’s now out, and his prize is a “dog’s life”, where he has to wear a dog costume and do nothing but stupid dog tricks. He’s already smiling, and does elect to keep the prize…which infuriates Boogie.

In the final round, Frank rolls an eight…but Danielle beats him by rolling a ten! Frank’s prize is five grand, but he trades for the veto. Danielle’s prize is a “spiritard”, but obviously she trades it for the veto. Yes, Frank has to wear this year’s version of the “unitard”. Frank is bummed, but Boogie claims he still has some tricks up his sleeve.

After the comp, Boogie and Dan head into the lounge to chat. “I just got beat by a sorority girl in a POV”, complains Frank. They talk about how no matter what they do, they have to get Dan on board for any plan. “I wish I could talk him into putting up Janelle”, says Boogie. “I want Janelle out of here.” They know this will take work, but they’re going to do their best.

First, though, we have to endure the filler for this episode – the “spiritard” and the dog costume. Yes, Ian, you are the Big Brother house pet. Actually, you have been all season. Yes, hilarity ensures.

Ok, back to the game, as Jenn and Dogboy head into the HOH. Oh wait, Jenn just brings the puppy up to the room, and then leaves so he can “solidify my alliance” with Dan, Shane, Britney, and Danielle. Dan screams that he loves the idea, but we have to sit through the idiocy of picking an alliance name. Their decision? The Quck Pack. Shoot me now.

Hilarity finished, Boogie now comes in the HOH to talk to Danielle. He wants to take out a really, really, really dangerous player out, and Danielle’s eyes light up when she finally figures out that he’s talking about Danielle. This way, next week when she can’t play she has “five warriors”. Danielle says she worries that Boogie will turn against her, but Boogie claims it would never happen.

Boogie then has the same conversation with Dan, and he knows that this will take more work. Funny thing is Janelle walks into the HOH just as they start the conversation. Boogie launches into how she will never “be workable”, and that he feels like he is “selling water in the Mojave desert”. Janele returns, but this time she is with Britney. Boogie tries to give the girls the boot, but they won’t budge. Janelle, though, is now rah rah Boogie, who outright says he doesn’t trust her. He isn’t willing to send Frank home to work with people that “have done nothing for me”.

Dan tries to mediate, but Boogie says he can’t trust Joe. So why not put up Joe in place of Frank? Janelle doesn’t respond, which Dan screams in the diary room it indicates she is lying. After this stalemate, the girls leave and even Dan admits that the coach alliance is never going to work. “It’s about time the two winners of the game got back on the same side.” Frank joins them in the HOH, and they celebrate their new partnership.

After the last commercial break, Danielle comes into the HOH and Dan tells her the story of what happened. Britney and Shane also join in…and eventually even Ian comes in. They go around the room to see what they think, and Ian says that while Boogie wouldn’t nominate any of them Janelle would have no problems with anybody in that room. “I think that it is much safer to get Janelle out of here because she’s much more likely to win HOH.” Wow, Ian. That is your biggest statement of the season. Danielle and Dan vote the same, while Britney and Shane are undecided.

Frank and Boogie now join the crew, and Britney says that she is worried what will happen if either Jenn or Wil win HOH. Once again, a name is more important than anything else, and they settle on “The Silent Six”. Gross.

But here comes Janelle! She knocks on the door, but nobody responds. Classy.

Finally, it is veto ceremony time…thankfully cut short so we could get that last scene in. Danielle calls everybody in, and we don’t even get the pleas from the nominees. “I have decided to use the power of veto to save Wil. This is nothing personal. It’s completely strategic.” Her replacement nominee is Janelle!

Britney pretends to be shocked as Danielle shuts the wooden veto box. Makeup-free, she gloats in the diary room, while Janelle complains that she felt so safe she didn’t even bother to put on makeup before the ceremony. “I would have put on a cute outfit, and actually washed my face and hair. I have no idea what happened, but I’m not going to go down without a fight.”

The show ends with Boogie and Frank doing their idiotic Chilltown II crap. Dammit, Boogie, just when I like you again.

So…what did you think of the show? How about those new alliances? Will Janelle leave the house tomorrow? Let us know your thoughts!

Sunday
Aug052012

No Recap Tonight

Sorry, folks, but I'm not going to do a recap tonight. This will be pretty straightforward episode, and everything that happened has already been covered her (plus on last night's BBGossip show). 

If you still want to know what happened, here's my prediction on tonight's show structure:

8:00 - 8:03 pm EST. Announcer tells the entire story of the season, just in case you forgot.

8:03 - 8:10 pm EST. We see everybody on the endurance contraption, but it quickly shifts to the moment Julie announced that "America" (cough cough) had voted to allow them to enter the game. There will be flashbacks of them hitting (or not, in Boogie's case) the red button, accompanied by diary room cheers and jeers.

8:10 - 8:30 pm EST. The actual endurance comp. Again, pretty straightforward, with the exception of typical diary room comments (Joe and Dan screaming, Frank and Shane angry at themselves for dropping). Boogie discovering the plot to evict Frank will also be included, using footage involving conversations with Dan, Joe, and finally Boogie spilling it all to Frank. The culmination will be the negoitations between Ian, Britney, and Danielle, and finally, the "From Here To Eternity" kiss between Danielle and Shane (with Dan's suggestion that Shane do this edited out).

8:30 - 8:50 pm EST. Danielle's HOH room reveal (gag me) and her desire to nominate Janelle start the segment, before moving on to show the coaches working on Danielle. Interspersed in this footage will also be Boogie's growing anger over the Frank situation. The final commercial break will occur after we see Dan "coaching" Danielle on who should be nominated.

8:50 - 9:00 pm EST. Danielle reads the HOH nom script (not very well), with the proper dialogue from anybody who the editors have deemed the viewers may believe will be nominated. The show will then end with the nominations of Wil and Frank, with proper angry reactions from the nominees and Boogie, along with smug smiles from Danielle.

While tonight's episode is destined to be a snoozer, the real actions could be on Wednesday's show. As stated by Ash's report last night, there really is a movement to put up Janelle. Danielle is seemingly working with Shane AND Frank right now. Obviously, this plot is one conversation away from not happening, but it could enliven Wednesdya's episode! Turn those feeds on and view for yourself!

Thursday
Aug022012

Big Brother #14, Episode 10 Recap

Hu-bris /’(h)yoobris/

Noun: 1. Excessive pride or self-confidence

Example: See Mike Boogie or Frank Eudy.

I’d say every person has a moment in their life where ego gets the best of them. Job security, financial projections, relationships, etc. We’ve all been hit by a situation that should have been seen from a thousand miles away.

Unless something strange happened in the couple of hours before tonight’s live eviction, we will see the definition of hubris in action tonight. Frank and Boogie have completely ignored or failed to notice HUGE indications that things were not going as well as they believed. Even being put up as a replacement nominee when no change was necessary didn’t cause a raised eybrow.

Instead, they spent the entire week lying around the house. Boogie took long, long naps and made idle chitchat in the backyard. Frank floated around the house, occasionally winking at a person or two to see if they were still on board to keep him around. At no time did either of these cocksure brainiacs have a serious conversation about Frank’s future in the house.

That will be Frank’s downfall, but it appears that’s not the only big news for the night. It appears that this will be the episode where the worst dreams of Big Brother purists come true. All indications from CBS point to this as an inevitable part of the show, and most predict there will also be an endurance competition. It should be an interesting episode, and for quite some time afterwards. (Buy the feeds now, folks!)

Before we get to all of that, though, we have some (heavily) edited footage to sit through, commencing with the reactions to Shane’s big veto replacement move. Boogie is not happy that he can’t go on “cruise control” this week. “I’m a little perturbed that they’re making me go back to work this week.” Ashley, of course, is ecstatic, but, obviously, Frank isn’t. He still believes he has the votes to stay in the house, though. Shane furthers this belief by whispering that their plan is still in effect. For some reason, we have to hear Danielle proclaim Shane’s move as wonderful, and we also have to listen to Joe scream some more about how he’s feeling better.

Frank joins Boogie in the bedroom, and attempts to calm him down by saying he’s still safe. “You knew you were getting nominated”, Boogie asks. Frank replies that if the noms were changed he knew it would be him. But “no matter what happens, you’re still good”. Boogie is pissed that Frank didn’t provide him these details. “I hate this lack of trust thing. What do we have to do to show we’re down?”

Britney then comes into the room with the biggest smile she’s had all season, and says “I know you’re pissed”. She again repeats the “forseeable circumstance” comment from Ian, and Boogie agrees he needs to be more careful with his words. Britney says that with Danielle the swing vote, Frank should be safe.

Wil is then shown heading into the HOH, and says that Shane’s move was amazing. They all pat themselves on the bat for awhile, and for some reason Ashley jumps into talking about the “spiritual world”. Everybody yawns as she rambles on, but then Shane says this was either the “biggest” or “stupidest” move in the game.

The camera shifts over to Ian in the have-not game, and he’s not happy that his biggest ally in the game is now up for nomination. He then joins Boogie and Frank, who consoles him while again relating the “forseeable future” story. “Don’t worry about it”, says Frank, urging him to remain calm. Boogie reminds him that all they need is Daniele’s help…and Dan.

For some reason, we then get to watch Britney and Janelle babble about menstrual and labor pains. Janelle says she never cries, and Britney is amazed. Britney feels that her lack of emotions is “a definite advantage in this game”.

With this filler over, we now see Janelle hanging out with Joe and Wil badmouthing Frank. Wil sticks up for Frank a bit, saying he’s not a bad guy. “(He’s) pure evil in this game”, replies Janelle. “Frank leaving is a best-case scenario for you. You’re getting your biggest competitor out of this game. This is a huge move for you, because they could have backdoored you but I had to keep you off the block. I kissed ass for three days straight.” Uh oh. Wil doesn’t take kindly to this conversation. “Thank you for saving me two weeks in a row”, he sarcastically replies.

Janelle carries on with this topic, and Wil is clearly getting more pissed off. Talk finally moves on to the next HOH competition, and Janelle says it will probably be an endurance comp. If it’s between him and Ian, will he make a deal with him? “I’ll tell him to go fuck himself”, says Wil. Janelle continues to talk over Wil, and the anger again rises before Wil finally walks away. Joe asks what the deal is, and Janelle’s reply is that he’s “just a bitchy guy”. Truthfully, she catches herself before she says something worse.

The next morning, Wil and Joe are sitting outside, and Wil asks his thoughts about Janelle. “She was all nervous about you last night.” Joe says he wasn’t quite sure what he witnessed last night, so Wil repeats that her claim that she was saved only because she kissed Frank’s ass the previous week.  Now Joe is freaked out, as Wil is one of HIS votes to stay.

Joe heads right back in the house to repeat (or should I say embellish) the story to Ashley. “I think he may have already joined their side”, he claims. Ashley heads out to grab Janelle, and Joe tells her that Wil is “insanely mad at you”. Joe now thinks they’re in “serious jeopardy”. This is doomsday for Janelle, or at least she claims in the diary room.

After the first commercial break, Janelle grabs Wil to clear the air. Wil claims he was made to feel like an idiot, and Janelle then whips out the tissue to create some fake tears. Ok, now I understand the inclusion of that earlier footage with Britney. She admits in the diary room that she’ll do anything to make Wil believe they’re still on the same team, and damned if she isn’t a competent enough actress. Ooooh, the closeup on her lips are horrific. Double oooh, Wil claims he is seeing right through her fake tears. I do like this guy. “I’m not buying it, but I’ll act along…but I’m not trusting her for another second in this house”.

Oh wait, there’s Dan. I almost forgot about him. Frank and Boogie are talking to him because to get Daniele’s vote “you have to go through Dan”. Frank says that Daniele is “completely protected” because it is Janelle’s players they’re going after. “I want to work with people in this game I can trust”, says Frank, who also asks Dan for a number on how much he trusts them. Dan babbles about how he has “game tape” on Boogie’s previous years, so their scores can’t be the same. To make sure we have doubts on who is going home, Dan yells at the diary room camera that he’s now unsure on how Daniele should vote.

Jump to Dan talking with Daniele, and Dan says he’d rather work with Frank and Boogie. She’s worried, though, that they’ll put her up this week, but is also excited about having some power this week. Unfortunately, she doesn’t want to anger her boy Shane, and Dan tells her to “stop liking” him. “He’s not your husband. He’s not going to be your boyfriend.” Daniele claims that she’s not thinking along those terms, but Dan isn’t buying it. “Nothing gets between me and my Shane”, he jokes, but Danielle claims she’s not letting Shane get between him and the prize money. Yeah, right.

It’s time for Julie’s meaningless chatter with the house, and she starts by asking what Ian has planned for the three grand that Boogie gave him after the coach’s comp. “Rent and necessities”, he replies. Boogie is then asked if it was difficult to take the bigger portion, but he doesn’t really answer except to say happy birthday to an uncle.

Oh Lord. Danielle is asked about her kiss with Shane. Ugh. On a scale of 1- 10, Daniele says it was a ten. Gross. Shane thoughtfully ups it to a 10.5. Footage of the coach’s comp is then shown to Janelle, and she just complains about her bruises. Thankfully, we’re now done with this segment.

Before we get to the actual eviction, we have to endure Julie’s talk with the HOH, Shane. He’s asked about his big move, and he babbles about the difficulty of balancing his thoughts with his coach. He admits that his relationship with Frank has suffered, and he can’t trust either Frank or Boogie. Of course, Julie has to ask about the FAKE kiss, but thankfully Shane says that he can’t have a showmance in the house! THANK THE LORD!!!

OOOOh, we get to see Frank’s dad, starting with his admission to Boogie that he’s Sid Vicious! After a little history lesson on Sid’s career, we head to Sid’s home. YES!!! Of course, Daddy thinks Frank is a huge target because he’s the greatest! Frank does admit that he hasn’t had the best relationship with his dad over the years, and we get the acoustic guitar music as Sid admits that the life of a professional wrestler means the children suffer. His mother adds that Frank would probably be surprised to hear how closely Sid has followed his son’s life in the house. Frank ends the segment by saying he hopes his father is indeed watching.

It’s finally eviction time, but before we get to it Julie has an announcement. She talks about how there have been theories throughout the season, and that there has been a poll on whether to allow them to enter the game. Julie opens the results of this vote, and America has (supposedly) voted to give them that chance. A coach can give up the right to be a coach, and if that does happen then there is NO eviction tonight. Instead, everybody would battle in tonight’s HOH competition. If the coach’s don’t remain in the game, then next week SOME of the evictees will have a chance to return to the game.

To make this work, the coaches will be brought into the diary room, and if any of them presses the reset button then they all re-enter the game. Britney is the first to choose, and after a moment of indecision she does indeed hit the button. Boogie then comes in, and doesn’t hit reset. Dan also hits the button, as does Janelle. Seriously, this was a poorly thought-out twist with zero chance of it not happening.

Julie then gives the news to the house, and they’re all led out back for the HOH competition. Boogie is clearly not happy. After commercials, we see that it’s a “hang on the wall” type endurance competition, and this time it is in the shape of a ship. Oh, and Shane is indeed allowed to play once again. Like always, after a minute or so the ship’s wall begins to move back and forth. And like always, after commercials they’re hit by water. My God, Grodner is so predictable!

That’s how we end his abortion of an episode. What are your thoughts? Are you glad Frank was saved (making two days in a row that my intro doesn’t work)? Do you like the coach’s twist? Let us know what you think!

Wednesday
Aug012012

Big Brother #14, Episode 9 Recap

Danielle Murphree. This dolt is a person who shouldn’t even show up on tonight’s episode. She’s not the current Head of Household. She’s not nominated, doesn’t win POV (spoiler alert!), and isn’t a replacement nominee.

Yet this crazy 50 Shades of Grey/The Rules aficionado (I’m assuming) is going to be all over this episode, mainly due to two reasons. One, she won’t leave the real HOH, Shane, alone for more than a few seconds. Trust me, this isn’t because he desires her presence. There’s no doubt that he’d rather she slither off into a corner (any corner) and not interact with him at all.

The second reason, and the most evil of the two, is the desire of CBS to rewrite the Rachel/Brendon storyline from the last two years…or the Jeff and Jordan “Dumb and Dumber” rewrite from their two seasons. As pathetic as both of those pairs were, though, at least they actually had a relationship. When it comes to Shane and Danielle, though, CBS is forced to copy/paste clips from different parts of conversations, sometimes spread out over days, to give the catladies something to accompany their bon bons and convenience store wine.

With that rant off my mind, it’s show time! Guess what? They begin the show with reactions to the nominations of Joe and Ashley. Shocker! Shane is calm, Joe (“the biggest target”) screams, a heavily-medicated Ashley cries, and Janelle schemes.

As always, Frank and Boogie run into a bedroom to celebrate. Boogie says the “game is getting too easy”. Oh boy, this could actually be good later tonight. At the same time, Janelle is informing Britney that she’s not mad at her. Like most of this season so far, Britney claims to be oblivious to Shane’s plan. Janelle says she’s “still willing to work with you guys”. She asks Britney if they realize how dangerous Boogie is, and Britney’s response is that this is how people feel about her. In the diary room, Britney concedes that she still doesn’t completely trust Janelle.

Janelle leaves, and Shane is now in the HOH all apologetic to Britney. Yet she claims that either way, this will work for them, and then proceeds to tell him everything Janelle just told her. “Janelle knows that if we win POV or they win POV, they need you. They need numbers, so she’s going to still be willing to work with you.” The option to put up Frank still exists, after all.

We’re back into the lounge area, and Janelle tells her team that they still need to talk to Shane, and that “it’s really bad if he thinks that you’re mad at him.” This advice doesn’t sit well with Wil, who says “I don’t want to be known as an ass-kisser”. Ashley agrees, but Janelle pushes on that they still have to push Shane to realize that he is safe if they somehow save themselves. Joe isn’t buying it, and screams in the diary room about her “love and butterflies” speech. “I just want to tell this dude how I fell, and I am pissed!”

Joe eventually does heed her advice, though, and make his way up to the HOH. Wow, we’re a full ten minutes into the show before the nightmare appears on the screen. Joe does an adequate job at kissing up to Shane, saying he made a smart move that he, the biggest threat in the house, would have also done. He says he does indeed want to work with “the strongest competitor in here”, which causes Shane to retort, “I wish you would have realized this two weeks ago”. POW! Joe’s eyes bulge, but he holds back until he can get back to the diary room for more screaming about “manners”. He does say it “sucks” and that he’s “mad”, but Shane isn’t too interested. “Is Joe trying to get on my good side”, he asks in the diary room. Joe adds that they’ll have to take him to the hospital “before I don’t win (POV) tomorrow”. Yeah, right. Joe’s silly.

Time to pick veto players, and Shane draws the witch…I mean, Danielle. This definitely pleases Shane, but not for the reason he states. He knows she has ZERO chance of winning. Ashley pulls out HouseGuest choice, and picks Wil. That’s good news, according to Janelle. “We have really good odds at winning this thing.” Too bad for Joe, though, as he pulls Frank’s name…the one name he just screamed he didn’t want. The host for this competition is Jenn, so at least she gets some screen time tonight.

They head outside, and it is a circus tent set. They’re all dressed as clowns, but Britney wonders why Frank is the only one “in the bozo wig”. Each contestant must roll two balls on different ramps at the same time. When a ball hits the ground, they’re out.

Yep, we get the usual “I have to win” speeches, and Frank just needs to make sure Joe or Wil doesn’t win. He thinks it doesn’t matter otherwise. For some reason, Britney gives Shane advice on how to keep the balls going, which is funny given how awful she is at competitions.

The game begins, and is over-explained, and Wil is the first one out. Joe is next, followed by Frank. Wait, Daniele is still in? Oh, not anymore. It’s between Ashley and Shane, and guess who wins? Yep, it’s Shane’s third POV victory in a row! Frank thinks this is “great for me”, but Joe is pissed enough to scream at the camera. Oh yeah, he always does that.

After commercials, Britney is now celebrating in the HOH. “You’re so lucky you picked me”, says Shane. Britney adds that it’s now “time for Janelle to know what it feels like to lose a player”. Really? She does a little Janelle imitation as she complains on how “annoying” her team is. “All they do is make up songs, braid hair, (and) cook.” Shane says he “can’t wait to see what offer Joe brings to the table”, but Britney says she’ll “shoot myself in the face” if she has to sit through that drivel. Me too! She then does a SPOT-ON imitation of him. This is the Britney I have missed this year!

They see Janelle and Joe on the screen making their way upstairs, and they’re not happy to see them already. “Can’t we have two minutes of peace”, Britney says in the diary room. “So annoying.” Janelle keeps it short and sweet, though, saying that Frank is the guy they should be targeting. “You have two of my players on the block, and I’m not trying to downplay them, but they can’t fucking win anything.” Valid point!

Britney counters, though, that while the two of them get along, Janelle’s players don’t seem to even want to work with Shane. Wil then also enters, as does Ashley almost immediately after. Britney is pissed, as she just wants to do what she does best – nap. Janelle jumps back on the offensive, saying that Frank and Boogie won’t take them to the end. It will be either Jenn or Ashley. Wait, Ashley was just there. Where is she now? Nice editing!

For some reason, Janelle then throws out her wedding ring as collateral that her word is gold, and also pledges her Chanel earrings. We talked about this last week on the Big Brother Gossip Show, and I still don’t understand this move.

The segment ends with Janelle saying she now needs to do some work with Joe, as she knows that Boogie is downstairs scheming. Actually, he’s not, as he’s sitting in silence with Frank and Ian. Well, not complete silence, as Boogie asks an exercise question.

Joe is lying around in the lounge area, and Janelle comes in to tell him that he MUST tell Shane that he wants to work with him. She is blunt, saying that if he doesn’t convince Shane to put up Frank that he will be the one that goes home. “If you want to stay in the game, you’ve got to grovel.” Cue more Joe screaming.

Joe gets his opportunity as Shane heads in from working out, and he babbles something about saving a person off a cliff. “That person typically becomes one of the most loyal persons you ever met. I’m on the cliff. I’m going home if you don’t save me.” He goes on about how being on this show is his dream, and that he’s “saving my life”. He pledges to work with him outside of his team, especially since Wil is obviously Janelle’s pet. “If you come and help me now, I promise you, brother, I will be there for you…this is life or death for me.” Shane claims that he isn’t completely sold on what Joe has to say, and asks if he’d take out his own team. “100%.”

Filler time after commercials, as it is time for the sushi dinner that Dan won in the previous coach’s competition. In case you forgot, Dan repeats how he picked the coaches to accompany him as a strategy, and including Shane was also a method of kissing ass. At the same time, a scantily clad Wil organizes his own party in the kitchen. If you want more info on these activities, go back to Ash’s EXCELLENT Saturday night wrapup.

Of course, the supposed big news of the party was the spin-the-bottle kiss that Shane was forced to give Danielle. Yep, it took longer to get to the psycho than I thought would happen tonight, but there it is. Both Daniele (duh) and Shane read their diary room scripts about how they wish it had lasted longer, and Shane doesn’t help by sort of inferring there may be a second kiss someday. Yeah, right.

We’re now shown a rare moment of Britney talking game to Ian. At first I wondered why, but once I remember what happened on the feeds when the veto ceremony was held I quickly recalled. This is actually a semi-important bit part for little Ian. She asks him if he’d put up Shane if he won HOH, and he seems to give the needed answer. “I don’t see any forseeable circumstance in which that would happen.” To Britney, that’s code for “yes, I would put him up”. You silly girl. “I was just looking for a ‘no’.”

Britney runs upstairs to tell Shane about this info, and says she’s “freaking out”. Oh wait, they didn’t edit this segment correctly, as Britney says she talked to Ian YESTERDAY. “He was trying to be so finicky”, which makes Shane believe that “Boogie has been in Ian’s ear”, which also means he’s been in Frank’s ear. All deals are now off!!!

They work on exactly what to say to Frank, although Britney says it will be “freaking scary”. We jump right to a conversation between Shane and Frank, who says in the diary room that he just wants to make sure everything is still “hunky dory”. Shane relates the Ian story, and babbles a convoluted voting strategy that will keep Frank happy even if he is put up as a replacement nominee.

The always paranoid Britney doesn’t want to leave Shane alone with Frank, and heads into to break up the party. She also relays the Ian story, and Frank claims that it is because Boogie has not told him what to say. “He’s not very good at this game”, he adds in the diary room. “This freaking kid is going to mess up my game.” Britney says that somebody from Boogie’s team needs to go up, and Frank suggests that person should be Ian.

It’s now time for Shane to make the “biggest decision” he’s had to make so far, and after three weeks he’s become pretty good at reading the script. The only entertaining part of the pre-ceremony diary room tidbits is Boogie’s cockiness, as he doesn’t seem to have any clue as to what is about to happen.

Shane brings everybody into the house, and after two meaningless pleas, decides to…use the veto to save Ashley! The replacement nominee is…Frank! Boogie storms out of the room as we hear Frank say that it wasn’t a total surprise. Shane hopes that Frank isn’t pissed, and will believe that he’s not the target “when he really is”. Britney babbles something about how Boogie is a “disgusting, vicious dragon” and Frank is the “curly head. Cut the head off of this dragon, and the rest of the beast will just fall dead.” Wait what?

Janelle is mighty pleased at herself, and says she just wanted to laugh when Frank was nominated. “Boogie, you thought you were pulling the strings in this house. There’s a new puppet master in this house, and it’s me.” Boogie, of course, is “super annoyed” that he can’t just “sit by the pool with no worries. It’s taking a little shot at me, and as you know, America, that doesn’t usually end up well for the other side.” Oh yeah? You’re a fool.

That's it for tonight, and I must apologize for my anti-Danielle rant at the beginning of this wrap-up. She really wasn't much of a factor tonight, and that is due to the fact that there was actually some strategy and unpredictable moves this week. That's what Big Brother is supposed to be about, after all.

What did you think of tonight's episode? Do you agree with Shane's big move? Are you impressed with Janelle's scheming? Who is going home tomorrow night? Let us know!

Sunday
Jul292012

Big Brother #14, Episode 8 Recap

The prospect of watching tonight's episode frightens me. Seriously, I'm almost panic-stricken. Why? It's not due to the fact that I'm going to have to view that dimwit Shane actually attempt to strategize. No, that's almost funny. It's also not the inevitable whinefest that is Britney fail another challenge. Nope, I'm almost used to it.

What scares me is a little Southern cliche whose "teaching" skills clearly doesn't include English. I've complained about this all season, but the words that come out of Daniele's mouth sounds to me like a mixture of taliban terrorists, Game of Thrones peasants, and Charlie Brown's teacher. The noises just don't make any sense, which is probably her only saving grace as I can't imagine my reactions if I COULD understand her.

Unfortunately, this episode is bound to include way too much of this southern inbred (my apologies to non-inbred southerners), as she has attached herself to our current HOH, Shane, as if she's a little poodle on his lengthy chain (which, by the way is also one of her 50 Shades of Grey fantasies).

If there are lengthy gaps in my timeline tonight, it is simply because it's become easier to skip her segments than to try to run them through my "moron interpreter". So let's jump right into this episode, and the always-predictable reactions to Jojo's ouster...which means the first portion of the show I can't transcribe. After Daneile's nonsense, Frank describes his week as "pretty spectacular", as two people from Britney's team left her only Shane. For some reason, Shane says that was almost "teary-eyed" as she left. Oh, and we have ot listen to Britney do what she does best - whine and whine some more.

We then jump to the conclusion of the HOH contest, which Shane won and was immediately dry-humped by Britney. Now we get happy, cocky Britney in the diary room. Frank, though, isn't as happy although he claims to have a bit of a deal with him. Ugh, Joe has to add his two cents. Oh wait, I mean YELL his two cents about what a "buzzkill" Shane's victory means to him.

The next shot is in the storage room, and Daniele is now the one dry-humping Shane. We're talking pelvic thrusts...on her side at least. Shane doesn't seem the least bit interested. Shane plays up to his phony stereotype, though, saying that last week his focus was on Jojo but with her gone he's going to play with Daniele this week. Gag me, please!

The mood is more dire in the bedroom, as Jenn (who?), Joe, and g-string clad Wil are not happy about the turn of events. Wil says that Shane has gone "from the hunted to the hunter", and that his targets are Janelle and Boogie's players. "I'm afraid he sees me as a shiny white doe that can be taken out in one shot. I'm screwed. Get me some camouflage, folks."

Boogie isn't so worried, though, because of the secret deals he and Frank made with Shane. He says in the diary room that while he has to mope around the house, he's not worried at all.

Time for more Britney whining, as she's complaining to Ashley how she's "so tired" of this and that and this and that. For feed watchers, this is a constant line of vomit from her pretty little mouth. She's going to make sure, though, that this week Boogie and Janelle's teams know what it feels like to be on the block. "I'm going to make sure that this week things get stirred up." For once, Ashley is a voice of reason, as she complains how Britney is "drunk with power. It's kind of scary."

HOH room reveal time. You folks all know how I feel about this.

Once this dogshit segment ends, Joe is now complaining to Janelle that he and Wil will be those on the block. Janelle decides she needs to rebuild her friendship with Britney.

Uh oh, creepy filler time again. Shane is shirtless as usual in the HOH, and Daniele can't hide the lust in her creepy eyes. Britney and Dan have a laugh about the sexual tension in the room. Too bad all the tension is one-sided. Britney decides to talk game play, and wants to put up one player from Boogie and Janelle's teams. She asks Dan who is the best person to go up, and Dan's response is the "most likely to win this game" - Frank and Wil. Before the topic can go any further, Shane pipes up and says he can't nominate Frank. "Wil is definitely going up because it's going to cripple Janelle." Britney argues that Frank is a much bigger threat, and Dan adds that they should want him out. Shane wants nothing to do with it, as he understands why Frank nominated him last week.

More filler, as Joe has decided to cook breakfast in bed for Shane and Britney. After his typical diary room screams, Boogie says he's never seen such a pathetic ass-kissing. Yep, sir, you're correct. Too bad he interrupted a "nice dream about Carmen Elektra" that Shane was having. Yeah, right.

And even more filler, as we get tonight's crazy chat from Ashley. She's a hippie chick who has something called a "Dreamboard" but loves rap music. Supposedly, this dreamboard thing resulted in her getting an iPhone. Um, wow.

Back to game talk, as Frank is now in the HOH with Shane, who says Wil is his number one target and that Britney wants him to also put up Frank. He wants to "stay true to my word", and that he'll vote against Wil if that makes him happy.

OMG, more Daniele filler! Fast forward. Fast forward...even if Jenn discussing coming out to her mother is involved in this segment. Wait, Daniele is scared of lesbians???

Back to game talk, even if Daniele is involved. She's lying in bed with Shane, and he says that he has to "make a big move". She thinks Wil and Frank would be the best move so it would cause Boogie and Janelle to go at each other. Again, Shane wants nothing to do with nominating Frank. Daniele isn't happy, and we're led to believe that he may be reconsidering. Oh, and these two dopes made a final two deal. Yep, that will happen.

Coach's comp time, and they're now all dressed as if they're in an Olivia Newton-John exercise video. In each round they have to do reps on an exercise machine.. The coach with the least reps is out, but they do get to pick a prize.

The first round is somewhat similar to a bucking bronco, and let's just say it appears that Janelle has done her share of ridin', if you know what I mean. When the time ends, Britney is in last place, and in her locker she has won the right to pick this week's slop recipients. Before she can make a choice, Ian (again) volunteers. Joe is her second choice, and Ian says that his strategy in taking the slop is that people will keep him around if he's willing to take punishments.

The second round is a back-to-back hip roll, and this time Boogie is out. His prize is a cash reward of $10,000 for himself and two players. He takes the six thousand, and gives three thousand to Ian and a grand to Jenn. For some reason, Ian tears up. Dude, you're playing for a half-million. Three grand is nothing.

The final round, then, is Janelle versus Dan, and this exercise involves working a lever back and forth with their tongues. Yeah, we know who is better at working that muscle. Um, eww It should be obvious to all that Janelle wins this round (107-45)...and the competition! Dan's prize is a sushi party for five people, and he chooses the coaches (so they're not alone without him around), along with Shane and Daniele. The most important decision, though, is Janelle's, who gets to either save or trade a player. Her decision is to save Wil from nomination this week. Shane, Frank, and Joe are not happy!

The house walks back into the house and discovers the lamest Have-not food in Big Brother history - salmon and Fruit Loops. Oh, I see. It has to do with Boogie's arguement with Willie two weeks ago. You just can't let the wild man go without some type of mention, can you CBS?

Up in the HOH, Joe and Janelle are groveling. Joe is just not good at this game, though. Janelle's move is to remind Shane what Frank did the previous week, and it probably doesn't hurt that her breasts are hanging all over the place. She offers safety for a week, but Britney is shooting daggers her way...or at least one of her eyes is pointed in that direction.

It's Boogie and Frank's turn to sweet talk Britney and Shane. This time, Britney actually speaks, saying that she wants one person from each team to be up to "even things up a little bit around here". Once they leave, Britney continues to Shane that he has to put up Frank...as Shane is being called to the diary room to start the nomination ceremony. "Oh my God, I don't know what he's going to do", she realizes as we head to the last commercial break.

It's nomination time, and after silly, loud comments from Wil and Joe, we get down to business. Shane is confused whether he listens to Britney or "stay true to my word". The first key belongs to Jenn, followed by Ian, Daniele, and Frank. The nominees are Ashley and Joe! Shane's excuse is that Janelle is the only coach that hasn't had a nominee, so she needs to know how it feels. Ashley is confused, and is in tears that she "doesn't trust anybody in the house". Shane hopes the risk is worth it, but Janelle says "game on" and she is going to do "everything in my power to fight". Joe says it's "on like Donkey Kong", and that if it's the last thing he does he's going after Shane. Um, how is that possible if you leave this week, you big dummy?

That's all she wrote, folks. What did you think of tonight's show. Did Shane make the right choices? And how crazy is both Daniele and Ashley? Let us know!

Thursday
Jul262012

Big Brother #14, Episode 7 Recap

Jojo versus Daniele. Which of these ladies is going home tonight? More importantly, does anybody care? Neither has really established themselves as noteworthy characters this year. In fact, they've done nothing but live up to the stereotypes that blemish the fine people of Long Island and Alabama. One is all talk but no action; the other is psycho talk but no action.

Before we begin, though, it should be noted that earlier in the day Julie Chen tweeted that we would se a "game-changing twist" tonight. I don't put much stock in this proclamation, though, as just last week the "trade or save" decision in the coach's competition was also labeled as such. I call it nothing more than hyperbole, but who knows?

After the customary hype from Julie, the show starts with the standard post-veto ceremony comments. Yes, Daniele is pissed. Yes, Jojo has her back against the wall but is still fighting...blah blah blah.

Daniele heads into the bedroom to drown her sorrows, and Coach Dan gives her a pep talk, telling her that his earlier conversation was a "motivational tool to light a fire underneath her". Whatever, Danny Boy. He acknowledges in the diary room that he "may have gone a little too far, but it's now my job to reel her back in". He promises to "help get you out of this mess". Thankfully, Daniele forgives him. Yuck!

Meanwhile, Shane is giving a similar pep talk to Jojo, reminding her that she's "never out of this game". Shane promises to help keep her around, and Ian then walks in. The lights are turned off, and Shane and Jojo begin their version of "sexy talk". Ian is a bit uncomfortable because he's trying to sleep while "Shane attempts to board the Staten Island Ferry". Nicely said, Ian!

It's now the next morning, and Ian and Daniele are sharing the cot outside. She asks him about the late-night conversation she overheard, and Ian tells her they were all just joking around. Daniele is SHOCKED to hear that Jojo and Shane were talking "da sexy" because, you know, in Daniele's psycho mind THEY were a couple. "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned", she says. Really?

Daniele heads into the bedroom where Janelle and Ashley are napping. She climbs into bed with them to badmouth Shane. Too bad Daneile doesn't know what "emancipated" means, but neither does Ashley as she meant to say "emaciated". Idiots. We do know how much Janelle likes "mean girl" talk, though, and she loves every second of it.

With the ice fully broken, Daniele relays everything that Ian just told her. "I thought you and Shane liked each other", replies Ashley. "He can get in Staten Island if he wants", is Daneile's response. Oooof. Yet Daniele isn't completely over Shane, as she adds "I lost ot Staten Island". In the diary room, Janelle reminds viewers how dangerous "showmances" are to the rest of the players.

Jojo now heads up to the HOH to talk to Britney. I mean get lectured by Britney, who gives her typical advice - shut up. "Absolutely anything can be turned against you", she says. "So it has to be nothing but pink roses and rainbows coming out of your mouth." She also adds that she just saw Janelle and Daniele laughing and cuddling. Britney doesn't think she got through to her.

Boogie now has to endure Britney's whining, as she pleads with him to not send Jojo home. She claims that Daniele is smarter than he thinks she is, and says it's because she knows she can't trust Jojo to do the right thing. Boogie says the only reason to even consider booting Daniele is if the coach twist comes true. "I do feel that the new people's automatic instinct will be to go after the coaches." Britney doesn't agree, and asks if she thinks he can work with Dan. When Boogie says no, Britney believes she has the upper hand in this argument, but Boogie claims that he has five noobs under his wing. "I would hate to see (Dan) go personally, but professionally I'd like to see him pack the bag and beat it on Thursday". Yes, there's the reasonable doubt we need before the actual eviction.

It's commercial break time, and when we return we have to once again replay the Willie situation. I guess it's a leadup to some Chen questions, as we go right to the living room after the taped segment. Ah yes, that is the case as Joe is immediately asked about what was going through his mind when Willie was going nuts. He says he was only thinking about protecting himself, and mindless cliches about handling the heat. Quit yelling! Ian is also asked since he was in the bathroom, and he admits he was worried about his own self-being but since he is an RA at Tulane he wanted to "step in and break things up. I just wanted to keep everybody safe". Shane's veto victory is then shown, and Britney says it was "incredible" when he won. "Well worth me jumping into a giant bowl of guacamole."

This segment was cut short because we have to spend some time with Dr. Will. After an intro package cut between shots from his tattoo-removal business and his Chilltown antics, he says that his pal Boogie is "doing a phenomenal job. He's got the guy with the crazy hair, he's got the nerd, and he's got the rocker. Right now, Boogie is coaching Frank to be his new Frankenstein. I think he's trying to build a bigger, better, faster Chilltown." Come on, Will, you can't possibly believe that crap! He does note that sometimes Boogie's ego gets in his way, like in the last Coach's Competition.

As for the other coaches, Will doesn't think too highly of their job so far. "Their play so far is lackluster, and less they get their act together very quickly Mike Boogie and his players are going to steamroll them." Will adds that if Seacrest and Kermit the Frog had a baby, it would be Dan. While he is always coaching, he believes that his eyes led him to picking the all-girls team.

Britney, though, is as huge a disappointment to Will as to the rest of America. "You better put your coaching hat on. If your players are getting evicted for violence, you're doing a terrible job at coaching." He says that Janelle is a "phenomenal competitor, but the question is (whether) she is good at strategy. If she wins this show, she will have redeemed her previous losses. If she loses, however, she's just a three-time loser."

The segment ends with Will's choice for the ultimate victor, and he thinks it will be Ian. "People may think that Ian and Boogie have nothing in common, and that is completely incorrect. He's just a forty year-old Ian." Ooooh, that's pretty good, Will! A nice little split screen allows Will to end the segment with a nice jab at Boogie's awful clothing choices. "Season two called, and they want their clothes back!"

While I thought it was eviction time, we have our first HOH chat of the season. Frank kisses up by asking Julie if she "is my homegirl". Ooof. She asks him about the importance of Boogie's advice, and it is nothing but admiration. His possible relationship with Shane is next, and he replies that he has to have plenty of different plans to keep safe. Will the alliance with Janelle last? Yes, he says. Thankfully, that's it for this segment.

Now it is eviction time, and we start with the final pleas. Jojo goes first, and she babbles about how she planned to play dirty but "that's not who I am...I think I've proven that I'm loyal, and that is what has got me in this situation". She believes evicting her is a mistake because "this game is all about making big moves". Well, isn't evicting her a big move?

Daniele is next, and almost falls on her ass. That was easily the highlight of her speech, as she just talks. Nothing is really said except that she likes everybody.

Voting begins with Wil, who votes to evict Jojo, as does Joe, and Ashley. After a commercial break, Shane votes to evict Daniele, but Ian and Jenn vote against Jojo. It's 5-1, and Jojo is the fourth person evicted from this season!

When the news is read, Jojo gives a little hip shake, and doesn't follow through with her promise to only hug her five friends (shocker!). Instead, she yells "make big moves", and saunters out of the house. Julie begins the interview by asking what she whispered to Shane, and it was nothing more than "stay strong" and "I believe in you". Sorry, Julie, I know you really wanted your fake showmance.

Julie then asks about why she "deserved" to be their more than Daniele, and she claims she proved herself in the first HOH competition. "The fight and the heart I have I don't think a lot of people in the house has." Yeah, but the issue is your personality, sweetheart. Willie is the next topic, and why she stayed loyal to him after the fight with Frank. Again, we just hear that she's "too loyal". Oooh, here's a question I like - Britney as a coach. Jojo believes she's the "underdog" of the coaches. Say what?

It's goodbye messages time, and it starts with Jenn. "Maybe the house can only handle one New Yorker." Hmmm. Shane does nothing to erase the sexist stereotype he's created so far this year, talking about how he's going to miss their makeout conversation. "Too bad we didn't get to do it", Jojo replies. After silliness from Daniele, we end with a very scary looking Britney, who...well, whines, of course, about her loud voice.

HOH competition time, and it's a hockey setup where the players have to attempt to shoot a ball into the slot with the highest number. Yes, it's this year's version of the golf game from last season.

Ashely is up first, and hits a four. Joe is up next, and after lining up like he's Tiger Woods, his three doesn't even beat Ashley. Jenn is the third player up, and she completely misses the target. The fourth player is Ian, and he takes the lead with a nine! Wil gets a two, but Shane ricochets a great shot to hit a perfect twenty. The game ends with Daniele knocking in a twelve, making Shane the new HOH!

After another commercial break, Julie congratulates Shane, who repeats Frank's rags to riches story from last week. Britney is also ecstatic...you mean we may have a week with no complaining???

When the mics are cut, Julie announces that America will decide if the coaches will be offered a spot in the game. Pleas go to CBS.com, and vote "2" to prevent the coaches from entering the game. Please, I beg you! Don't let them enter!!!

That's it! What did you think of tonight's episode? Do you agree with Dr. Will's assessment? Are you happy with Jojo's eviction, or Shane's victory? And what about the new America's Choice gimmick? Do you want the coaches to enter the game? Let us know your thoughts!

 

Wednesday
Jul252012

Big Brother #14, Episode 6 Recap

Life without Willie. These words seemed to be an impossibility just a week ago. He was our General, as my friend Colette Lala called him. Our very own Tyrion (and just a bit taller).  A "One Man Revolution", as Tom Morello sings on his most recent album. Viva Le Revolution! "Little Willie" did indeed go home, but life goes on in the Big Brother house...just with a bit less intensity. Ok, a lot less intensity.

Tonight's show should feel condensed, since we didn't get our normal nomination conclusion this past Sunday. That means we get noms, a veto comp, and a veto meeting...plus replays of King Willie's exit and I'm sure a bit of cheese. That's a lot of material in 42 minutes.

We start off with the typical rundown of the entire season to date, just in case you forgot what has happened in the past three days. The actual show commences with yet another replay of Willie's ouster, and the house reaction to Allison Grodner's announcement. Ian recounts his front row eyewitness view of the Joe/Willie encounter, saying that even though he was clad only in a towel he wanted to break it up. "I was extremely scared at that point in time."

Britney does what she does best this season - whine. Everybody hates her, her team's backs are against the wall, blah blah blah. She really sounds like Rachel this year...without the victories. Shane says he was "frustrated" and "petrified" because he knows that he is now a prime target for Frank. Just in case you didn't get that the first time, Dan repeats almost verbatim this thoery. Shane, Jojo, and Daniele are in trouble.

Leaving the whiners downstairs, Janelle, Boogie, and Frank head upstairs to celebrate. "We now get to nominate and evict somebody else", shouts Boogie. "Two for one this week. It's happy hour, baby!"

Jenn joins the party animals, and Janelle asks about this week's targets. Claiming it's a risky move, Boogie says he's pushing for Daniele and "one of our team", so Shane and Jojo aren't even in the thing. Then whoever wins the veto would use it, to be replaced by either Shane or Jojo. Wait, what?

Janelle isn't too keen on what Boogie is saying, and says in the diary room that she still doesn't trust him even though she's working with him. "I don't want any of my players going up, even as a pawn." Jenn is also incredulous. "I'm not interested in this plan, because in Big Brother the pawns go home." Frank, though, thinks it's an interesting plan.

Meanwhile, Shane and Jojo are drowning in their own tears downstairs. Shane figured he would have been on the block anyway, but with Willie gone "I don't know what to expect". Jojo decides that she "deserves" a shot from Frank, and barges into the HOH. "I at least deserve a chance."

Jojo does her best Britney impression, complaining how it isn't fair and she "swears on my grandma's life that I was going to have your back. Obviously, I've shown that I'm loyal to those I align myself with." Yes, my dear, and that's why you are in this situation. Frank counters that he told her last week that if she voted for him "I know that I can trust you". Well, that didn't happen, thanks to King Willie's demands. In case you didn't recall, CBS replays that footage. Jojo's response is that Willie "put it in my head that you can't be trusted". Wow, this is a nothing conversation, and Jojo's diary room explanations don't aid her in this cause.

Three days late (in TV time, at least), it's finally nomination time. The keys are pulled by Jenn, Ian, Joe, Wil, and Daniele. Yes, Jojo and Shane are nominated. Frank comes right out and says that it is because they were aligned with Willie. Shane says he saw it coming, but Daniele is worried that she will be the replacement nominee if either of the noms win the veto.

Britney pulls her two players into the Have-Not room to cheer them up. Wait, it's Britney. What was I thinking? No, she plays up the pity party instead, babbling about how much this week is going to suck. Wow, she really is a terrible coach. "We're all having to go down because of Willie." She continues in the diary room, but she's sounding more and more like Daniele every day. Britney also tells them both to lay low this week. Yep, don't fight at all. Nice work.

Meanwhile, Boogie is reminding Frank that Daniele has had a pretty easy ride so far this season. His plan for Frank is to attempt to "nurture" relationships with both of the nominees, since at least one of them will still be in the house.

It's now time to pick the veto players, and Frank draws out Ian's name. Shane, who doesn't care what name he picks, gets Ashley's name. Both Dan and Daniele want her name pulled, but it isn't meant to be as Wil is pulled by Jojo. The host is Joe (ugh). Daniele is pissed, as "I have to watch my fate be determined by every one else who is getting to play". Hey, I was able to transcribe a Daniele diary room statement!

Before we get to the veto comp, we have to have some idiotic filler. Ashley wants to have babies and get married, and she says "looks aren't huge for me". Please, kill me now as she goes through everything she likes in a man.

Ok, it is game time. Joe is dressed as a mariachi, and it's obviously a Mexican-themed competition, complete with margaritas. The contestants are dressed as giant chips, and there are giant dipping bowls. They must reach in these bowls and grab the "ingredients" listed on the menu.

After lots of babbling about "do or die" and "controlling my destiny", the game begins. In case you forgot the rules, Ian repeats them for us before another Long Island cliche from Jojo. Ian adds that he has an advantage because he has a photographic memory, but we also have to endure more Ashley craziness. Seriously, she is becoming another Daniele.

Ok, time to fast forward to the conclusion. Shane is the first to lock in his results, followed by Ian, Jojo, Frank, and Wil. For some reason, Ashley continues on...and on and on. "She is slower than pond water", says Joe (I think).

The results start with Ashley, who had 13 of 16 right. Wil had a perfect board to take the lead, but so does Frank, Jojo, Ian...and after commercials, so does Shane. This week's POV goes to Shane!

For once, Britney gets to actually celebrate (with a little help from margaritas), and Shane heads up to chat with Frank and Boogie. "Sorry I screwed up your plans", he says. "Now you know I'm legit." Boogie says that they're not unhappy with these results, and Shane says that he does want to work with them. He claims that he doesn't care about the coaches, and that it is an individual game. Boogie babbles some metaphor about a wounded animal, calling Shane a "wounded pet". "If he can be loyal to Willie, imagine what he can do for me!" Boogie tells Shane to not breath a word of what they're talking about to Britney, Jojo, or Dan, and after he leaves tells Frank he believes he can trust him.

Of course, talking is what Shane does next, as Britney grills him on what went on. Oh wait, he really doesn't, as he denies that they made any deals with him. Nicely played, at least as far as what CBS is showing us tonight.

Dan is now talking to Daniele, and has an interesting theory that if he's seen attempting to help her it will actually make it worse for her. Has the Britney germs infected the whole house? In the diary room, he claims that this is a "coaching technique" to "light a fire underneath" her. Um, whatever. Shane walks in, and this gives Dan an opportunity to leave. Daniele jumps right in and asks who Shane is going to vote for. Just like last week, he claims that he doesn't know but that Jojo is on his team.

Instead of lighting a fire under her, she just heads into another room and cries about how she "has nobody...I feel so rejected and unwanted". This could be my favorite moment of the episode.

At the same time, Shane heads into the have-not room to inform Jojo that he wants to convince Frank to put up somebody besides Daniele as the replacement nominee. "I'm going to tell him to put up Wil. Backdoor him. Get him out of this game." Jojo loves this plan! They're going to tell Frank that if any of them win the next HOH, including Daniele, they won't put up Frank. Instead, they'll target Janelle's team.It's the next morning, and Frank and Shane are the earliest outside. After some small talk, Shane launches into his plan. Is Frank buying it? I guess we'll find out in the last segment during the veto ceremony...

...which just happens to be the next segment of the show. Since it is his second week reading these lines, Shane shows a bit of improvement in his script reading, and everybody else does their job before Shane makes the obvious announcement. Frank stands up and..puts up Daniele in his place. Yeah, despite CBS's attempt to create a storyline, Frank does as expected. Frank explains that it is too early to do some risky like nominating Wil, and Daniele complains that it sucks to be up. Jojo adds that she's a "fighter", and that she "wants it way more than she does". Wait, you can't use Dan's football cliches! In 30 seconds, Dan makes up for it by tossing out at least a half dozen other cliches. Make it stop!

There we go for tonight's episode, and I have to say that squeezing that extra segment made this a quicker-paced show than most Wednesday episodes. Take out that awful portion of the show featuring Ashley and you'd actually have a show that makes sense. What do you think? Did Ashley and Daniele annoy you as much as me? Should Frank have put up Wil instead of Daniele? Let us know what you think will happen tomorrow night!

Sunday
Jul222012

Big Brother #14, Episode 5 Recap

Alright, my friends, you better have your popcorn ready tonight, as this is going to be a good one. Tonight is the bitter and disgraceful end of the reign of King Willie, and hopefully a lot of questions are answered.

But how much of the King's fall will we see? As we talked about last night on The Big Brother Gossip Show, there's a good chance that the typical Big Brother Sunday night template will be altered to capitalize on what could be the show's best chance for a ratings boom. I predict that we won't see the nominations; instead, tonight's broadcast will cut off right as Willie goes off on Joe and Janelle. Wednesday's show will then show the true fireworks and his departure.

So here we go!!! It's flashback time, just in case you forgot what happened three days ago. Yes, Frank, you made a comeback, and Willie is not happy. Janelle adds that aligning her team with Frank is a smart move for the time being. Ashley explains her vote to evict Kara as a way to get rid of somebody who was going to play her game - slipping "under the radar". Interesting.

After Kara's departure, Willie is seen steaming and Dan is consoling his remaining player, Daniele, by telling her that he won't "let her down" like he did Kara. Yeah, I'm sure that makes her feel better. He also adds that even with "one chip", Big Brother allows you to play so he's still in the running.

Meanwhile, Frank and Boogie are jumping around. Boogie explains that the vote was basically the house versus Willie. "The house decided that the best chance to get rid of Willie is to keep Frank. Kara probably wasn't going to dare to go after him." Boogie advises Frank to "go out and get HOH". This is exactly what Frank does, of course, and the two continue to gloat. Ugh, the Frank and Boogie Show is old already.

As they celebrate their victory, Willie storms out. "At this moment, I really don't want to talk to anybody. The worst person that could have won won...I'm going to stay fighting, and hopefully win POV and then HOH next week." Foreshadowing? Shane adds that he's considering dropping his affiliation with Willie.

Janelle is now seen consoling Britney, and says that "I now you like Willie, but he needs to go". In the diary room, Janelle adds that it was impossible to keep her alliance with Britney because Willie is so uncontrollable. Ugh, there goes the "bully" word from Janelle. "The entire house wants him out." Britney adds in the diary room that Willie has embarrassed her, and that it was a mistake to pick him for her team. "It's a disaster."

Dan is still giving Daniele advice, and his plan for her is to "get closer to Janelle's team". Once again, we have to endure coaching analogies from Dan, but it does seem to be sinking in on that little psycho nurse/kindergarten teacher.

Now Frank is in the storage room, and it is Jojo's time to suck up. She babbles nonsense about how she is such a "loyal person. It was nothing personal against you." She says in the diary room that she wants to stay loyal to Willie, but continues to talk shit about him. "I think I can work my magic on Frank." Girl, you have no magic...especially when you talk.

Interesting...we're already at the boring section of the show where we have to view Frank's HOH room, and we have not seen Britney tearing a new asshole into Willie. That was the post-eviction show story of the night, as she carried on and on and on. Willie also has no desire to go through this idiocy, but does wander up for a few minutes. Boogie also gets some HOH stuff, and we get a (non-)touching moment of him showing a picture of his child. Willie hangs around for a bit, and then disappears.

Oh, here we go with Britney chewing out Willie. He calmly walks into the lounge room (whatever it's called), saying it's all "no big thing", and she then rips into him for being egotistical, a brute, and the cause of all things wrong in the entire world. Nope, Britney, you made yourself the fool, not the King.

Filler time, as Shane and Daniele flirt. Awful, even with a rare Jenn appearance from the diary room. Plus, I still can't understand a word that twit says.

Now we get to some stuff about the coaching twist. Britney walks into a room where Dan and Boogie are rehashing various scenarios, and Britney says it's doubtful that anybody would actually trade except for her. Boogie counters by saying neither him or Dan are "obvious players", and babbles that getting rid of Willie wouldn't really save her for being the target team since she also has Shane. Britney claims in the diary room that she can't be screwed over by Boogie. Yeah, right.

More filler, as Dan and Janelle talk about how hard it is to be in the house while married and with a kid. Come on, CBS! You have a shitload of major material to show and you're wasting our time with this bullshit!!!

And the time-wasting continues, as once again we see Boogie mentoring Ian. Come on, while I will admit Boogie has given him some good advice you can't possibly believe viewers will buy Boogie as a mentor while wearing the godawful clothing he is constantly sporting on the show.

In fact, this is old, old, old material. In fact, this is from over a week ago, as Ian tells Boogie that he wants to have a date with Ashley. What.The.Fuck. They relay the info to Dan, who goes and drags Ashley outside to propose this "slop date". Ashley plays the role, though, saying that she has a "soft spot for the cute, little nerdy guys with glasses". For the real story, go back to my post from last Monday called "The Worst Porno".

Finally, we move on to game stuff. Britney is in the lounge with Jojo and Shane, and asks what they've been thinking. Shane says they have to "separate from Willie". Jojo adds that it may be better in the long run to just lose Willie now rather than hurting them all for weeks to come. "If there's a way that I can try to keep both of you in the game this week, that's what I'm going to do. I don't think it's fair what has happened; that Willie's actions are going to come back to bite you."

It's now time for the Coach's competition, and Frank and Boogie are dressed in...um, I'm not sure what they're dressed as. Old school NYC white rappers??? They all head out back to the lamest inner city set I've ever seen. There are telephone booths, "graffiti", newspaper stands. Um, it's awful, even with Ian trying to explain it to use.

So the players are all supposedly dressed as old school rappers, but they look...um, ridiculous. Britney doesn't understand the gold pants, either. "I don't know if I'm supposed to be a genie or...a waiter." The actual game consists of transferring bricks of money across a balance beam, and if they drop it they're out of the game.

After the requisite I "have" to win this game, except for Dan who says he's building a weak persona by constantly losing. "We've got to keep it up." Britney jumps out to a huge lead, which is accompanied by silly diary room lines from the rest of the cast, until she knocks over her stack of cash.

Ian now uses physics to inform Boogie how he needs to proceed, and he's in the running with Janelle. Boogie is just a bit ahead of Janelle, but jumps off the beam BEFORE pushing the button. OMG!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA! Britney loves that he fucked up! "What an idiot!"

Janelle obviously then wins, and she proclaims that the "comp queen is back in the house". She then has to decide whether to trade or keep a player safe, and she decides to keep Ashley safe. "I'm going to need Ashley in this game. I want her to focus and bring her a little bit closer to me, so I kept her safe this week."

Janelle also has to pick the week's have-nots. "I'm definitely picking Willie. Jojo, Shane, and I'm sorry Ian, but you're going to have to take it again if you want the BB experience." Jojo is steaming, especially that she put Shane back on slop. "You're just a mean bitch."

After another commercial break, the house walks in from the competition to find the results of this week's America's Choice for the Have-Nots - pork rinds and pudding. Stupid Jojo decides we need to hear her talk like Fran Drescher. Really, she does. It's terrible. Ian has no problems with this selection, as "pudding is one of the best have-not food choices in the history of Big Brother".

As everybody is milling about, Willie attempts to pull Shane and Jojo into another room. Shane has no desire to follow him - "no, I'm good for a little bit". Britney denies this little meeting, and says in the diary room that Willie is "dead to us". She pulls Jojo into the have-not bedroom, and tells her that she can't be caught talking to him. "When he tells you to come some where, don't go."

The kitchen is now empty except for Jojo, and Willie walks in and says that he's "gonig to get the heat off y'all". Britney then walks in, and tells him to "just stop".

Upstairs, the rest of the crew is gloating. Downstairs, Britney continues to berate Willie before finally telling him to just go "act like that upstairs".

"You think I'm scared", replies Willie. He suddenly sprints up to the HOH room, leaving Britney to continue to complain about him to Jojo. As the HOH crew catch him coming up via the skycam, Willie stops and explains that his anger is because the rest of the team are getting the backlash he caused. "It makes no sense, and I'm about to square that up right now."

Joe rushes to the HOH door, but Willie barges in, saying "I fucked up last week, right? Y'all ain't gotta blame them (Jojo and Shane)." Joe pipes in, saying that those two "chose to stay with you, brother". He then lays out the line that has been repeated for the last two days, that "I'm going to get myself evicted before I get out that door".

Jojo is now shown complaining about Willie to Daniele, as Willie wanders across the house and into that same room. Jojo says that she's sorry but she can't associate with him. He paces around the room as Jojo scatters back to her pudding. "I'm not letting him take me down with him."

Willie continues to pace, and then walks back out into the kitchen. He starts nibbling on a pork rind, and suddenly says "I've never seen a bigger group of pussies in my life". Britney, of course, has to whine back, and Willie says he's "not going out with class". Joe then heads back to the kitchen, and as he walks past Willie says "there's a bunch of (bleeps) in this bitch". Joe asks him what he said, and Willie races to confront him. Ian, dressed in a towel from his shower, attempts to play peace maker as we go to a commercial with Willie and Joe about to punch each other.

When we return, Willie gets into Joe's face, and the noise brings everybody down to see what's going on. Despite what we've been told, Willie doesn't really give Joe a headbutt. They're face to face, and Willie just pushes him with his forehead. We then hear BB tell Willie to go into the bedroom, and it is Janelle's turn to get into Willie's face. "It's our house, too. You don't own this place." Despite what we've been told (primarily by Janelle herself), Willie doesn't really throw a pork rind at her. Well, he kind of does, but it's nowhere near as exciting as I was hoping it would be. Joe is told by BB to not follow Willie, and Jojo consoles Britney. Well, everybody consoles each other in various rooms. Willie is instructed to come to the diary room.

Inside, we see them say, "I need you to come with me", as he walks away from the diary room area.

Now Jenn is consoling Britney, because you know it is all about her. Jojo is still complaining to Shane that they're "going to go down for him", but Boogie is laughing about the whole situation.

Alison Grodner's voice comes on the speakers, and the house is called into the living room. She reads a statement that "violence is not tolerated in the Big Brother house, so Willie has been removed from the game". Britney says she's relieved, but coming from "a game perspective, this is the worst thing that can happen to me as a coach". Yes, Brit, it's all about you. Ian says that he deserved it, and will go down in history as "the least dignified history in Big Brother history". Shane repeats Jojo's mantra that it sucks for them, and in a rare Boogie moment he actually sounds a bit contrite as he talks about what Willie gave up due to a bad temper. Joe ends the segment, and show, by screaming at the camera that he hopes that Willie finds peace.

That's it, folks. I'm a bit shocked that they showed the entire Willie segment, but I'm also pissed that so much of the show was wasted with silliness (and old footage). What did you think of tonight's show? Did you think the entire Willie saga was Britney's fault? let us know your thoughts.

Saturday
Jul212012

Big Brother Gossip Show #20: Little Willy

It should be pretty obvious what we talked about tonight on The Big Brother Gossip Show. Yes, it's Little Willie Hantz, and we go over his tumultuous week beginning with his reaction to Britney's disclosure that the coaches believe they'll be entering the game up to his shocking eviction Friday night. Besides the actual events, we also talk a little bit about the ramifications of these events, including how CBS will fill out the rest of the season and whether future Big Brother seasons should include stunt casting such as the Hantz booking. We even have a handful of tunes in tonight's show!

Once again, here are the instructions to listen to the show. You can stream it via Scott's Android/iPhone app, The Ledge, or via Stitcher (http://www.stitcher.com/listen.php?fid=16875). You can also subscribe via iTunes (http://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/big-brother-gossip-mp3/id502746488), and if you do please leave us a review. Finally, there's also a feedburner site - http://feeds.feedburner.com/bigbrothergossip - that links you to a number of different methods to subscribe. 

Finally, for a direct stream or download, please click...

--->HERE<----

Thanks to Mike, Ash, Colette, and Karen for their help in putting together this episode. Now go listen!!!

Thursday
Jul192012

Big Brother #14, Episode 4 Recap

I have a confession to make, and it pains me to admit this. In the interest of fairness, though, I have to admit to you, my fine readers, that I’m just not excited about tonight’s episode. While it has been a tumultuous first week in the house with seemingly every player trying to fit a whole season in just a few days, the actual eviction episode is bound to be anticlimactic.

It didn’t have to be that way, as the decision on who to evict changed almost every day. Wait, I take that back. It seemed to change by the hour! Yet somewhere last night the final decision was debated for the last time, and unless a handful of people are good at poker faces the outcome is predictable.

It’s not just the actual eviction that has me a bit less than enthusiastic. Last night’s CBS episode (and the previous two) showed that CBS believes that all the viewers care about are the so-called “legendary” coaches. Last night they had the entire focus of the show, and I don’t see that changing tonight. Meanwhile, the ten new players who don’t have Hantz as a last name are completely ignored except for filler entertainment.

However, I am a bit excited for the last few minutes of the show, as if it goes off as I’m hoping it could set the stage for an even more crazy few days. I’m not counting on this happening, though, as it is very rare that the broadcast version of this show lives up to any expectations.

So let’s get this over with by starting off with the predictable reactions to Shane’s decision to not use the veto. Guess what? The nominated people aren’t happy, and neither are their coaches! What a shocker! Oh yes, and Shane repeated the only sentence he knows about not wanting “blood on my hands”.

Frank heads upstairs to talk to Willie. He thinks that Willie is the key to staying in the house, so he sucks up to him by saying that he’s the only one he trusts. “You’re still good to stay in this house”, replies Willie. “I’m telling you that I’m going to get you your votes this week. The only way it would stop is if you run around and start talking to people.” FORESHADOW ALERT! Willie doesn’t stop babbling, though, and claims that he controls the entire house. Hmmm, interesting.

Dimwit Shane now comes up to talk to Willie, as does a bunch of other noobs, Britney, and Janelle. Willie informs them that as a group they need to decide who to keep. Wil makes a case for either decision, but Britney wants to boot Kara so that Dan is down to his last player. “He has magic powers, and when he talks to you hear an angel chorus.” Willie adds that if Kara becomes the next HOH (pretty unlikely), Dan will make her put up some of their crew. The decision has been made – it’s Kara that’s going home.

Janelle decides that she doesn’t want Dan “gunning” for her, so she goes outside and sits with him. “I don’t know why, but they really want to keep Frank…these people are stupid.” Meanwhile, Britney is giving her the evil eye (or maybe one of them is just wandering) as Janelle complains about going with the majority of the house. Oh, little Brit is pissed.

Now Britney is sitting inside eating cereal, and she just happens to notice that her name on the wall also has a place for the key. We’re supposed to believe a little light bulb just hit at that very moment, instead of the constant babbling about this very topic she had done with Janelle. She “now” believes the coaches may be entering the game at some point as a big twist.

She just has to head up to King Willie with this theory. “There’s two missing weeks.” She also believes that Janelle has partnered up with Dan to stay in the game. Ooooh, Willie is not happy because that screws up his entire game. “I’m nobody’s pawn in this game.”

Jump ahead to a sunny afternoon, and Britney is sitting with a number of people saying how she just wants to forget there is a game and “live harmoniously”. Willie, though, wants to stir some shit. “I want to have a house meeting with just the people that are playing the game.” Britney is not happy with this development. “I’m just seeing my entire game go down in flames.” Janelle attempts to follow them in, but Willie sends her packing.

After they head into the HOH, Dan tells Janelle and Britney that if that was one of his players. “I would have nixed that”. Janelle doesn’t seem to care, though.

Willie starts the ball rolling by saying that they’re being played by the coaches, and they could change the game by ignoring their coaches. Daniele interrupts, but I cannot for the life of me understand what she says.

Back outside, Britney wants to know where Boogie is. He’s napping. Meanwhile, Willie is telling everybody the key situation, and that the coaches may enter the game. Ian assists in this discussion by saying the show needs at least 13 people to play the game.

Oh wait, we have a Judas. Joe believes that they’re jumping the gun, playing too hard, and making too many assumptions. A quick edit goes to Wil claiming that he’s going to take a 24 hour break from “playing the game”. The segment ends with Willie proclaiming that if the coaches enter the game, they’ll walk away with the half million.

After a commercial break, it is time for round two of the big fight. Frank claims that he felt better about his chances before the “town hall meeting”, and he’s second guessing how Willie is playing the game, so he’s now back into the HOH to see “where his head’s at”. This won’t end well. Willie claims that nothing has changed, and that they “need to stay strong”. For some reason, Britney enters the room and Willie makes fun of Wil’s proclamation to not play for 24 hours. Frank shakes his head, and says he “was rubbed the wrong way”.

Frank heads back downstairs and informs Joe and Jenn that he doesn’t like this situation. Neither does Joe, who claims that Willie wants a split vote so nobody can figure out who voted for whom. A flashback shows this exact conversation, and now Frank is completely pissed. “I don’t think I can trust him, and I don’t think he’s somebody I want to work with.”

Completely incensed, Frank tells the story of Willie mocking Wil, and dumb Joe is “not happy with that all. That’s not part of the game.” So Joe runs and tells Wil, who “does not tolerate one frickin’ ounce of anybody making fun of anybody. Willie mocking me is going to come back to bite him in the ass, and I’m going to make damned sure it does.”

Wil, along with Frank, go off to let Britney know of this situation, and here is exactly where it turns from mocking his voice to a supposed “gay slur”. Britney doesn’t believe it. “I think Willie is a good person.” Of course, she runs upstairs and tells Willie he’s “screwed”. The entire story is repeated to Willie, and that Frank is supposedly turning the entire house against him.

Now we’re outside, and Willie is claiming to Frank that he’s been trying to save him all week. “Is that really true?”, Frank replies. “I’ve been begging everybody to keep you”, claims Willie. This silliness goes back and forth for quite some time, with Willie saying that all Frank had to do is shut up. “I have to protect myself. This is my game, Willie”. Finally, Willie stands up and screams that he wants everybody to vote Frank out.

Finally, Boogie can’t take it anymore and asks Willie “who died and left you boss?” Point to Boogie! “Why do you get to tell everybody what to do?” As he walks out, Boogie asks “are you all going to bullied by him?” Meanwhile, Britney looks ready to commit suicide.

Uh oh, before the commercials Julie promised a “big surprise” for the coaches. I’m scared.

After the break, it is time for Julie to talk to the house. She asks Jojo about the mood of the house. “I’ll be honest. A little weird; a little tension. I didn’t think it would be like this the first week so soon.” As a superfan, Julie wants to know from Ian if it has lived up to his expectations. He’s loved every second of it. Wil is then asked for one word to describe the past thirteen days – “goodness”. Ashley is asked the same question and replies “loosey goose”. Oh Lord. Willie says “crazy”, but Julie wants one word to describe his reign. As always, he goes off on a speech, but Julie presses him for one word. “Just extreme. Just pressure.” You idiot. Boogie is then asked if playing as a player or coach is harder, and he says it’s obviously the coaching role.

As they say on BBUK, it’s “crunch time”, and Frank gets to go first. He wants to stay, and promises to fight hard. “Nobody should let a bully dictate how they play this game, or how you vote. Bullying is not ok outside this house, or inside this house. If the coaches are telling you to get rid of me, think about what’s best for your game. But if they’re telling you to keep me, please listen to your coaches.”

Kara is up next, and she says she’s played an “honest” game (she hasn’t played ANY game), and she also reminds everybody to vote on what will be good for their individual game. She adds something about how a person on their team has made a deal with the person you’re trying to save. What does that even mean?

The voting now begins Daniele, who votes to evict Frank, as does Shane. Joe, though, votes to evict Kara, Ian. It’s now tied as we go to a break.

When voting resumes, Jojo votes to evict Frank. Jenn then votes to evict Kara, as does Wil. Ashley is the final vote, and her vote to evict Kara decides the contest! By a vote of 5-3, Kara is the second person evicted from Big Brother 14! Btw, CBS, take off the viewer tweets from my screen.

Once she finally leaves the house, Julie kicks off the interview by asking why she was evicted. She claims that people are scared of her coach, but overall she really doesn’t know. She claims that Dan was a great coach…the “best coach possible”. Julie then asks about Kara’s shyness, and whether it cost her. She now wishes she had gone against Dan’s wishes and talked more. The segment ends with taped goodbyes, and after Daneile’s typical indecipherable nonsense, we have to endure Joe’s idiot “you got the looks but you ain’t got the game!” Ugh. Shane says he’s sad to see her “long legs” go, and Dan ends by admitting he let her down. Oh, and Julie says that Hugh Hefner tweeted support for her.

It’s HOH competition time, but before we get to that, we are shown footage of the house being awakened multiple times last night by “BBTV Breaking News” of a cat burglar in the house. It’s a quiz game called “Big Brother Break-In”, and the questions are all about the videos they saw. Each question has a guilty or not guilty response, and the last one standing is the new HOH.

Everybody has the correct “guilty” answer on whether the burglar stole a carpet tile. The second question is about the number of bites of food in the storage room, and Shane is now out. The next question is about which leg he shaved, and all but Frank and Wil are out! They both answer not guilty to a hat question, and they’re both wrong. They also both guess correctly for the next question, but a question about gloves leads to a wrong answer from Wil. Frank is the next HOH!!! Willie is not happy, and immediately storms out of the backyard!

Before the show ends, we head back into the house, and Julie congratulates Frank. “It feels great to go from the hot seat to the guy who is going to be upstairs next week.” Boogie is asked about his feeling about his player winning, and he’s “super elated. My man was out the door 48 hours ago.” Ugh, he calls the HOH Chilltown North. Janelle is then asked to compare this past week to her first two appearances on the show, and she says it was like they played three weeks in one week. “Usually, everybody knows who is leaving. This time it was up in the air until the last minute.”

Julie then addresses the coaches, and says that the winner of the coach’s competition “has an even bigger decision to make”. The winner can either make one of their player’s safe, or choose to trade one of their players for another coach’s player. Ugh. Everybody is eligible to be traded except for the HOH.

And…scene. Were you  happy with tonight’s episode? Are you glad Frank was saved, and ultimately won HOH? How about this insipid “big” coach’s twist?

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