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Entries in Episode Recap (127)

Wednesday
Jul092014

Big Brother Season 16, Episode 7 Recap

Before we get into tonight’s episode, I have to apologize for the lack of Sunday recap. I travelled up to Minneapolis with my extended family to view a Twins game, and although I planned to do a writeup after I returned I just never got around to it.

I did watch Sunday’s broadcast, though, as I got ready to go out for dinner. Really, there was nothing revealed on the show, although I was a big upset with how much footage they used that didn’t fit into the timeline. Come on, the “lotion” segment was from the first night of the feeds!

It did kind of make sense to utilize it, though, as an attempt to explain just why Devin has it out for one of his nominees, Brittany. We will see an interesting twist to that relationship tonight, however...along with some other surprises (if the footage is accurately edited, that is).

Let’s get on with it. After the usual lengthy recap, the episodes kicks off with the reaction to Nicole and Hayden’s Battle of the Block victory. They all walk into the house, and Devin is already acting like the King of the castle, happy that “Pow Pow did her part by throwing the competition...I’ve been pulling so many strings in this house, I consider myself the puppet master.” Ugh.

Nicole, Hayden, and Christine head into the storage room to jump around in celebration, complete with bad sound effects. “Don’t mess with us, I guess”, says Nicole in the diary room.

They head back out acting cool, and hug Amber, who hopes she’s still safe this week. Of course, Caleb also wants to hug her. Creep.

Brittany is now telling Pow Pow that she thinks she’s going home. She knows she’s Devin’s target, but is not done fighting.

Hayden and Pow are now up by the HOH room, and Devin apologizes for putting in the position where he could possibly be going home. He stupidly informs Hayden that Pow Pow was in on the plot, and threw the competition. You’re such a dummy! Why would you openly say that? Pow Pow adds that she “could have dominated that” competition. Um, no. Hayden finds that comment hilarious. Devin then hugs Hayden and babbles that he’s going to ensure Hayden stays as long as everybody. Hayden is as creeped out as the girls.

Hayden is back down with Nicole, and she’s talking about how happy she is that they’re now safe for a week. He’s still worried, though, that the story of Pow Pow purposely losing will become public knowledge. “The last thing we want to be is associated with Devin’s evil genius plan.” As she walks away, he jokingly asks if they can now kiss.

Zach now tells us in the diary room that there are two subdivisions in the bomb squad. One is the supporters of Devin, “aka the idiots”. Then “there’s the non-supporters of the dictatorship. The firm believers that Devin is insane.” He’s talking to this group, and can’t believe that Brittany is the target. They’re tired of doing Devin’s bidding, and want Brittany to stay. “Next week”, says Zach, “one of us is HOH, and we’re backdooring Devin.”

Time for filler, as Caleb flirts with Amber. Devin and Frankie look on in disgust. Devin thinks that she’s just playing him, and that he’ll eventually pick Amber over him. “You don’t mix business with pleasure.” Derrick and Christine are also with Caleb and Amber, and they also talk about keeping Brittany. We then get a flashback of Devin being verbally aggressive to Amber. They all believe that Devin is a problem, and Caleb promises to “protect my queen”.

A bunch of boys are now playing pool, and Devin walks out. Caleb mentions that some girls are starting to feel uncomfortable around him, and that many want to keep Brittany instead of Pow. Devin’s not happy. “That’s stupid. Who’s a bigger threat to the alliance?” Instead of recapping may I point you to our latest Big Brother Gossip episode? It’s all covered there in fuller detail.

Devin finally heads inside, babbling to himself about how he’s always got Caleb’s back. “You’re a lovestruck puppy. Whatever. I don’t even care.” He continues on while the other boys play pool, before again wandering back downstairs to start the fight over and to say “there’s no more alliance”.

Thankfully, we have commercials, and we come back to bare feet walking around the house. Then Frankie and Derrick walk in to discover they are the newest additions to “Team America” (fuck yeah). They’re both thrilled. To find out who the other members are, they are to hang out by the weight bench at 9 pm and say “bald eagle and apple pie”.

Sure enough, most of the house is outside around nine, and Derrick is asking people about their favorite desserts. Frankie answers “apple pie”, and then asks about favorite animals. Caleb doesn’t have the answer, but thinks he has a ton of info about bald eagles. They still don’t know the identity of the third member, but Derrick has figured it is Donny. He sits next to Donny and asks the dessert question, and the gang is now all together!

It’s now time to pick the veto players. Devin pulls Zach’s name, Brittany gets Derrick, and Pow Pow pulls Amber. Devin is sort of happy because there are three Bomb Squad members, but is unsure because of what happened last night. Caleb is then shown heading up to the HOH room, and he apologizes to Devin. (Ok, let me interject here. Before this conversation, Caleb was involved in a conversation where they indeed decided to save Brittany. He then ran up to narc on the others, and that chat started with this apology.)

Devin then does what he does best - he lectures Caleb. We do see Caleb saying that people are talking that Devin may not have the votes he wants. But AGAIN, we’re not seeing what transpired just ten minutes before this where Caleb pledge to go with the save Brit campaign! They finally hug it out, and Devin continues to lecture.

Uh oh, in the hug Caleb lets slip that people have mentioned putting Devin up in the future. “Who said put me up?” Caleb stumbles and says “everybody”. Devin isn’t surprised, but thought the Bomb Squad would have his back.

He sends Caleb down to get the rest of the Bomb Squad for a meeting. It’s time for a much-shortened version of a Devin lecture. “It’s time everybody puts on their Big Brother face, their big boy pants, no emotions, let’s do this already.” Wait, what does that even mean? “We’ve got to get on the same page every week on who we’re sending home. This is not a one-person dictatorship.” He says that 50% of his reason to get rid of Brit is personal, and outs Pow for throwing the competition. He asks who everybody wants to boot, but the girls clam up. This infuriates Derrick, as they’re the ones that talk the most in public about this.

Finally, Zach speaks up, saying that Pow is “by far the weakest player I’ve ever seen on Big Brother in my life.” He says he likes Brittany more, so he wants her to stay. The room goes quiet. “What are you talking about”, asks Devin. Zach adds that it’s impossible for all eight people to agree on anything, and Devin responds by asking who wants him gone.

Zach immediately knows he’s in trouble, and stick around to explain to Devin that he’s “with him until the end”. He admits that he had said at some point that he wanted Devin gone, so he now knows “who the weak link in the alliance is. Now my trust is broken.”

After more commercials, it is now time for the veto comp. Before they head out, we do see Devin telling Pow that if he wins he’s pulling her down. Zach thinks that’s ridiculous. “He has one person’s back, and one person’s back only, and that’s his own self’s back.”

The comp is in a futuristic, outer space setting, leading Frankie to make a floating ball joke. The competitors are dressed in space suits, and the planets are named after “Big Brother icons”. Devin says he hopes to get one named after him. Yeah, like Dipshit?

The “mission” is to hang the ten planets on a device in a way that balances without touching each other. There’s a lot of useless chatter, and silly music as people like Amber, Pow Pow, and Brittany have trouble. Zach comes close before his balls fall. Derrick is also doing well, but remember, Devin is a self-proclaimed “born competitor”. He does kick it into gear and wins Veto! Will he save Pow Pow as promised, though? We’ll find out in about ten minutes (or three days ago if you watched the live feeds).

When the show comes back, Zach is saying that he must now show Devin that he’s completely with him. He heads into the HOH to congratulate him, and Devin asks which of the two he’s going to vote out. Zach says it doesn’t matter, and then asks what’s wrong. Devin replies that he no longer trusts him. “I think he’s just telling me what I want to hear”, Devin says in the diary room. “That doesn’t fly in my book.” Zach wants to continue to talk, but Devin kicks him out.

Zach then reports what happened to Frankie, who asks him if he’s surprised. “What did I say that was so bad?” Frankie says he disagreed with him. Zach felt that it would help make them build trust, and Frankie now is wondering if their alliance is going to work if Zach blows up their game. They hug it out, but Zach doesn’t know how he’s going to get out of this mess.

Brittany then heads into the HOH to talk to Devin. She says that she wants to stay, and it’s now time for her to get a Devin lecture. She throws out the “parents” line, and the sad, piano music pops up. “It’s harder for us, and we have to fight harder. We have a lot more emotions and stuff that are going through us being parents. It’s not worth me missing out on everything.” Devin admits that she’s saying the right things, and “it touches my heart”. Devin demands that if she is saved, she must be loyal to him the rest of the game. She agrees, although she admits it “leaves me with an uncomfortable feeling in my stomach”. He continues to lecture her, and then tells her that Pow Pow threw that earlier competition. Why does he do that???

(BTW, this is another case of bad editing. This conversation, I mean lecture, went for over 90 minutes. Seriously, this girl deserves the world for putting up with him.)

Now we’re back to Zach versus Devin. Zach is sleeping in the living room, and Devin comes up to complain that he’s mad at him. “I’ve only been honest with you”, replies Zach. Devin again says that when he said this stuff he didn’t mean it, and Devin demands that he come to him whenever things like this are said. “If you want to put me on the block, then do it.” Devin claims that he had never thought of doing that...until now. Yeah, right. “If it’s really what he wants, then I might just have to give it to him.”

It’s now the moment of truth. Will Devin save Pow Pow or Brittany? Will he put up Zach? Or maybe somebody else? Nobody knows...or that’s what they dutifully say to the cameras.

Devin asks for the nominees to talk, and after Pow Pow says “it’s probably the only time I’m going to shine”, she pulls her jacket down over her shoulders and poses. What the hell was that about? Brittany says she’s not a threat, and has done nothing to back stab anybody. She concludes by saying her target is sitting next to her.

Devin then says he looks at Brittany as a huge threat, but now thinks she’s a great woman, person, “and an even better mother”. He won’t let a “single mother of three” sit on the block, so he pulls her down.

For the replacement, Devin puts up Zach!

It looks like the show is over at this point, but suddenly Brittany asks to say something. She stands up in slow motion...and then we hear from the announcer that “all hell breaks loose post-veto meeting” Ooooooh!

What did you think of tonight’s episode? Were you feedwatchers as upset as me seeing how they picked and chose their footage? What about Zach’s meltdown? Or semi-meltdown, as most of it will be shown tomorrow night. Let us know what you think!

 

Thursday
Jul032014

Big Brother Season 16, Episode 5 Recap 

Here we are with the first eviction of the season. Will it be the goofy “DJ” that speaks in baby talk? Or will it be the blue-haired hairdresser who somehow was voted for “Team America” but annoyed feedwatchers with her constant babbling?

We’ll also see how the show is going to handle the double HOH issue. Will there be separate teams again, or will the competition give the title to the top two finishers?

So let’s get to it after a super super-lengthy recap of the first week of the show. (Is it just me, or have these intros seemed longer than usual this year?) We kick off with the reactions to Donny coming off the block, replaced by Joey. Caleb hugs her, and tells her not to take it personally. She responds that it was a mistake, as it wasn’t what the house wanted. This is dumb. Caleb doesn’t like anybody, particularly a girl, to tell him he’s wrong. He doesn’t think she’s in any position to have such an opinion.

Now Pow Pow is talking to Caleb, and she’s telling him that she wants to stay. Caleb tells her that she has nothing to worry about, as Joey has “dug her own grave”. Pow Pow says she’s decided to just lay low this week.

We’re now shown a bunch of girls laying out in the sun, and Joey has decided that seven is her lucky number because that’s how many votes she needs. Since she was born on February 7, she somehow believes she has a shot to save herself. Silly girl. She works on Brittany and Nicole, and Brittany actually does want to save her. Neither girl gives her any real reason for hope, although Nicole happily reads the diary room script to make it seem like it may happen.

Devin is now asking Victoria (and Amber) who they’re leaning towards keeping in the bathroom. Devin wants it to be unanimous, so he tells Victoria that he needs to vote against the house. “Those who vote against the house will be targets.” This upsets Victoria. “I didn’t come into the house to play Devin’s game.” Others have entered the bathroom, including Zach, who is pissed that he would ask that.

Devin is then shown informing everybody else in different rooms that it has to be unanimous. Frankie responds in the diary room like I’ve been thinking. “As long as we have the votes, what does it matter?”

Joey is still campaigning, though, and now she’s working on Christine, who thinks it may be too early to go against the house. Joey wants to know why this would matter. “You’re the first target”, she responds. She then moves on to Zach, and attempts to work out a deal, but Zach says he’s voting with the house. He wants her to stay, though, and says there is a possibility that Devin and Caleb may change their mind.

Knowing she has little shot, Joey decides to “do something crazy” to hopefully get her votes. She dresses up as a man, Alex. How this will help her I have no clue, and I’m assuming the diary room told her to do this. Dressed in her costume, and then accentuating it with a “bulge”, she goes in and out of rooms yelling and doing other “manly” things like lifting weights. Nobody seems to really care, including the viewers, although once again Nicole happily reads the diary room cue cards. Pow Pow is thrilled, though. “Everybody knows Joey is crazy.”

After the first commercial break, it’s time to show the insanity of Caleb. He’s shown giving Amber lustful looks, and saying she’s “smokin’ hot”. He says he’s had a crush on her since the first day, and we get a montage of silly things he’s said about her. She wants him, you know. Frankie says it “seems kind of eighth grade”.

Cue the piano music, as Amber is now in the HOH room with him. He professes his desire for her, or attempts to, but his plea dies when he says “there’s a certain way you look at me”. Amber is horrified, and the room instantly cools. She thanks him for talking, and exits the room as quickly as possible. Caleb is still clueless. “I’m not going to give up”, he says.

With that over, it’s eviction time! Joey gets to talk first, and she says she’s physically and mentally stronger than Pow Pow. “Pick me. Keep a strong person in the pool.” Pow Pow responds by saying “thanks, Joey, for saying I suck at competitions”. Good one, silly girl. She wants to stay in the house, and “I do have a big heart. I still have a lot of fight in me.” That made more sense than anything she’s said so far this season.

Voting then starts with Devin, who votes to evict Joey, as does Derrick, Frankie, and Cody. For some reason, we then go to commercials. Zach is up next when we get back, and he also votes to evict Joey, as does Brittany, Nicole, Christine, Victoria, Jocasta, Hayden, Amber, and Donny. Yep, Devin got his wish with an unanimous vote.

Julie then announces the decision, and Joey calmly hugs everybody before departing. While we wait for the interview, Brittany is shown crying but nobody talks. Julie begins the interview by asking if she’s surprised it was unanimous, and dumb Joey thinks she had this all-girl alliance. What? Julie carries on with this topic, but Joey is unable to really give anything back. Let’s face it. Joey is worthless as a Big Brother contestant.

Finally, we get to the goodbyes. Frankie is first, and he says how much he loved her. “We’re cut from the same cloth”, but does add that she wasn’t made for this game. Pow Pow says she’s sad that Joey’s gone, but she’s happy that she survived. “I’m going to miss you, but I’m definitely not going to miss Alex.” Nicole gives an ultra-gooey “I loved every second” statement, and Caleb the expressed the Bomb Squad crap. “You just got blew up, baby girl.” Joey says he’s stupid, and says she knew they had this giant alliance. Julie finished by teasing the fact there’s an undercover cop and a brother of a pop star in the house, and that since the Team America player was evicted next week will see two people voted in.

With Joey’s stint over, it’s now time for the HOH competition, and this week there will be a male and female winner. This competition has a “Greek Week” theme, and the girls and boys will compete separately. It’s called “BB Rager”, and they have to walk across a balance beam toa  stack of kegs. They then have to haul “kegs” back to the other side, and stack them. Those not playing are able to throw frisbees at the other competitors.

The girls go first, and Amber jumps to an early lead, and Pow Pow far behind (again). One of Brittany’s kegs falls over, so she’s out of the game. Amber lays down her final keg, and wins!

Before the boys take their turn, there’s another ad break. A long, long ad break. When it finally kicks off, and Hayden sprints to the lead. Derrick is out almost immediately, and Cody is not far behind Hayden. Devin begins to catch up, and Hayden falls as he is running back after his last keg. Cody barely beats Devin to the buzzer, and is the male HOH!!

Or is he? Wait, there may be a problem with the ending. Julie says there needs to be a review of the tape! But first, we find out that Donny is this week’s Team America winner! Yes! Yes! Yes! That’s the only person I want in this awful twist. He’s almost in tears as he reads the announcement.

This final commercial break seems to go on forever. Julie then comes in and announces that Cody’s foot hit the ground before he hit the button. That makes Devin the new HOH!

 

 

Sunday
Jun292014

Big Brother Season 16, Episode 3 Recap

We’ve met the cast. We’ve been introduced to the twists. Tonight, we’ll hopefully get some clarity on how all of this is going to work.

After the always-useless (and lengthy) recap of what happened the first two episode, tonight kicks off with my least favorite segment of this show. “Who wants to see my HOH room?” Ugh, slap me now. Especially since it’s two HOH’s. Double the boredom.

They all dutifully head upstairs, and Joey says her head is “spinning”. Yuck. This segment is just like every other year’s version of this. The only difference is that there are two of them, which we’re constantly reminded. Victoria, though, thinks that the HOH shower is for her because, you know, she’s a princess. I must admit that Frankie is kind of humorous when he talks about how he’s going to have to pretend to like those “Flatt CD’s” (Rascal Flatts). “We’re going to just bond this week. I know it.”

Now everybody is outside, and Amber (along with some boyd) is doing handstands. Nicole and Christine are on the hammock, complaining about how all of the other girls are “like toothpicks”. Come on, Christine, you’re not exactly a heifer yourself. Nicole says Christine is like her friends back home, and Christine agrees.

Back inside, Frankie and Caleb have a conversation in the HOH. Frankie asks him if they want to work together, and Caleb says he does. “Nobody would ever expect that”, says Frankie. As always, he’s in charge of the conversation, but Caleb says they “mesh so well together” despite their differences. Frankie wants to know who their target should be, and Caleb says they should let people’s true colors show up in the next couple of days. Frankie agrees. It’s now time to look for some “soldiers” to help them out.

Frankie and Caleb are now downstairs talking to Devin and Derrick. Caleb says the “last thing I want to do is be on the block with some floaters”, which leads Devin to complain about the girls. “They get very emotional. They play with their hearts.” The idea is to make an all-guys alliance, and Caleb wants to bring in Zach...and possibly Cody. In the diary room, Derrick says he thinks this is “ludicrous”, but he’s playing along. Frankie, though, is all in, because six guys should be able to win every single competition the entire season. Of course, they have to have a name, so they decide to call themselves the “Bomb Squad”.

Caleb adds that he doesn’t believe any of the girls are smart enough to pick up on this, and we get a few nice bikini shots of Brittney and (a non-bikini wearing Nicole) talking nonsense to “prove” this fact. Thank you, CBS.

Zach is then brought into the room, and he’s let in on the plan. “We’re the frickin’ Bomb Squad.” He loves it, although he says in the diary room that he’s been expecting this. “The strong players in the house need some brains behind their operation, and that’s the Zach Attack.” As much as I like Zach, this segment seems to be pretty scripted.

The “silly” music comes back on, and we switch back to nonsensical “girl talk”, and this time it’s Jocasta and Paola. Meanwhile, Cody is now brought in, but I cannot understand why they’re letting Devin do the talking. Cody agrees, but he also thinks it’s silliness. “Did I just join the next Brigade, or did I just joint the next Moving Company that can kind of fall apart within the next couple of weeks?” Hmmm, another script?

After commercials, Nicole and Christine are talking game again. Nicole says she has to find that one person she can trust, and Christine can always trust her. “I will never, ever, ever throw you under the bus.” Christine is buying into this, because (as we saw earlier) she’s no fan of jocks and pretty girls. They’re outsiders, yo! People are going to think they’re smart because they wear glasse! “We’re a force to be reckoned with”, says Christine.

Silly music now comes up, and while most people are doing nothing, Devin notices that the TV in the living room says “Nominations Today”. “Oh shit.” Or was it “oh fuck”? He calls everybody into the house, and the entire house freak. “Holy crap”, says Pow Pow. “This game just got real.” Um, ok. Victoria isn’t worried, though, because “Frankie and I are super close.” She is worried about Caleb, though.

It’s now time for a Double-D meeting. Devin tells Donny that no matter what, he has to be “mentally strong”. Of course, Devin doesn’t inform him of his new alliance. He “has no idea I’ve abandoned him for the Bomb Squad”. Donny assures him that they are still together. “You are the beast. I am the...I don’t know what I am.” Poor Donny. He is worried about Caleb, and Devin starts to act worried. “I can’t even focus right now”, he tells Donny as he almost tears up. Of course, as Donny leaves the room Devin smiles to the camera because, after all, he’s “here for my daughter”. Ugh, he sucks.

Frankie and Caleb are now talking about their potential nominations, and Caleb says he thinks Brittany is dangerous. Say what? Caleb says her smile “fades to the point of a fake smile”. What? Frankie plays along, but it’s obvious he doesn’t agree. Or doesn’t care.

Pow Pow is Caleb’s other target (“she’s crazy), while Frankie wants to put up Victoria and Brittany. Caleb wants Hayden put up, but Frankie can’t really justify it. Caleb thinks each side should have a guy and a girl put up, and Frankie says it makes sense. In the diary room, Caleb says this is the way to ensure they “don’t have blood on our hands”. Kids, that’s a phrase you’re bound to hear quite often these next couple of episodes.

There’s another commercial break before we get the nominations. Frankie reads the script while we see them stand in front of the keys. They then head upstairs, and each must grab an egg to see who nominates first. Caleb is first, and while he says he’s going to make the Bomb Squad happy he must do what is best for him. Frankie does get to see who Caleb nominates before he makes his choices, and we again get silliness about blood on their hands.

The cast then gathers around the table, and instead of the keys of the whole house being pulled, each HOH reads their nominations. Caleb first pulls Donny, whose face is then lit up on the screen. His second nomination is Pow Pow. He says they are great people, and he says he picked because they were the first of their gender to fall in the HOH competition.

Frankie then pulls his first name, and it’s Victoria. His second choice is Brittany. As Victoria starts crying, Frankie explains that he also picked as to who fell first during their HOH competition. Victoria is stunned. “Shove that in your you know where”, she says in the diary room. Brittany just can’t let herself be the first to go home. Donny isn’t surprised, as he was the first to fall and there hasn’t been time to bond.

Devin consoles Donny, and tells him that he needs to fight. Pow Pow comes in, and Devin walks out. Pow Pow says that Donny has to be strong for both of them. They must stay positive so they can come down off the block.

Meanwhile, Nicole and Christine are jumping for joy in the storage room. They really don’t know how they survived. Nicole is especially excited after seeing players do this in the storage room every season. This super fan stuff is going to get old really quickly.

Sad piano music comes up because Caleb (wait, what?) is tearing up because he made some girls cry. He has “heart for people”, you know? He’s just a sensitive soul who had to put people up for no good reason. Why are they showing this?

Victoria is now shown walking down the hall, and Frankie jumps out of a multi-person conversation to console her. “I’m good”, she claims. He pulls her to a side room, and tells her there is no way she’s going home. He says that it broke her heart to do this, but if it hadn’t been for Caleb putting up Pow Pow he would not have done this. “I had no choice”, and he claims that he would never hurt her.

When we get back from another break, Amber is complaining that she’s sore. Half the house is asleep, and Devin has decided that he’s going to bring some girls into their already giant alliance. “Every year, the guy’s alliance kind of gets played out.” How would you know, you recruited goof? He has decided to bring in some of the strongest girls. Christine is also in the room as he outs the fact that there is a six-guy alliance. What is he thinking? Christine can’t believe it. “Why do you think you can trust me?” she laughs in the diary room. Amber also says she’s in shock.

Devin heads upstairs to tell Caleb what he’s done. I’m not going to transcribe this idiocy, especially when Devin says it’s “foolproof”. Caleb is not happy, and the girls are then brought up. “We are honored to have you”, he reluctantly says.

It’s now the next morning, and Derrick and Frankie are in the HOH room when Devin comes in to inform them what he’s done. Cody then walks in, and he’s told the big news. Cody thinks this is the dumbest thing ever. “This whole bomb squad is pretty much going to blow up in our face.” Devin attempts to explain why he did this, but the guys are beyond pissed off.

Now we’re downstairs for some filler, as Donny does some yoga with the girls. Thanks to Donny, this isn’t as insufferable as usual. Devin then walks in, and Donny tells some homespun tale that makes no sense to me.

For some reason, this makes Devin believe that Donny really isn’t so dumb. He believes that because he’s downstairs “holding court”, he must not really be a groundskeeper. Wow, Devin really is the dumbest Big Brother cast member ever! “You think this bearded groundskeeper is really James Bond?”, Frankie says in the diary room. Zach tells him that he’s being silly, but Devin is convinced that he’s right. “This is the same mistake everybody makes”, he says. he believes that Donny threw the comp, and is plotting to take them all down.

Finally, it’s now time for “Battle of the Block”. Everybody involved in the competition is dressed to the nines, as if they’re at a ‘20’s ball. They are on swings, and must pass champagne from one person to the other. The first to fill their flute wins. Pow Pow fails miserably at this, although Donny is beyond patient. The other two girls proceed a bit better. After a bit, they even get a rhythm going.

Although Pow Pow and Donny finally build some momentum, it’s pretty clear who wins. Brittany and Victoria run away with it, so they are now off the block! The nominees are Donny and Pow Pow, and Frankie is no longer HOH! The show then ends with the usual “I’ve got to fight” comments from Donny and Pow Pow, along with some paranoia from Frankie and others.

What did you think of tonight’s episode? Just how out of his mind is Devin? Do you like how the Dual HOH’s works out? Tell us your thoughts!

 

 

Wednesday
Jun252014

Big Brother Season 16, Episode 1 Recap

We’ve all watched Julie Chen hint at the twists. We’ve taken a look at the interview videos, and made fun of the backyard “group” pictures.

It’s now finally time for the game to begin. It’s time for the twists to be explained (or some of them, at least), and it’s time to truly meet this season’s collection of freaks, cretins, models, and recruits!

Well, some of them at least. For tonight’s show we’re only going to meet half of the cast, as the “twistiest twists” are so shocking it’s going to take two days to explain! Well, we shall see about that, as I’m one of those who are generally let down by these types of production games.

So let’s get those season off to a start!

Strangely, Julie Chen starts the show inside the house, just outside of the hallway. She goes through the usual lines of “no cellphones, no internet, etc.” before heading onto the Big Brother stage. She goes through all of the catchphrases before we get to the phoniness of the first eight house guests receiving their keys.

We first meet Paoloa, a DJ from New York. She says her DJ life has helped her develop a thick skin, “so bring it”. We get a bunch of shots of her partying while she talks about how she hoeps there are “hot guys because I plan to manipulate them...even the ugly ones”

We then meet Donny, our resident Duck Dynasty hick. His brush to fame is that he was “Kelly Pickler’s janitor when she was in high school”. Ok then. He goes through his usual boring day, and his dad says to “not take any wooden nickels”. He says that he’s not as dumb as the others will think he is, “but I ain’t as smart as I think I am”.

On to the beefcake, as a shirtless Cody is next. He knows he’s going to be great at physical challenges, and he’s close to his family. He also wants to meet cute girls.

And now the season’s nightmare. Frankie Grande overdoes his Hollywood 101 reality show acting as he jumps for joy after “finding” his Big Brother key. He is shown dancing around a New York City street as we hear about how he’s a Broadway performer. “And I happen to be the brother of one of the most famous people on earth.” Ugh. We then have to endure her song as they flash back and forth between pictures of him and his sister. He says he’s not going to tell anybody about his famous sibling, but has to add that he’s the “queen of YouTube”.

Thankfully, we now move on to Amber, and after a spread eagle shot on a rock climbing wall, we get a bunch of bikini pictures. She’s an athletic country girl, which gives us an opportunity for more camera shots of her ass. She also likes to shoot guns and ride dirt bikes. “You don’t have to worry about my dad. You have to worry about me.”

Speaking of country girls, we then move on to Nicole driving a tractor. She says she’s quirky and talks weird, and we get a lot of down home shots of her doing small town things. She’s a super fan who has been watching since she was eight, and says that she’ll have to lie if necessary, despite what her parents say.

Next up is Devin in a batting cage, just so we know that he used to be a professional baseball player. Professional as in the minor leagues, that is. “Now I’m a full time dad.” He says you can never “underestimate a full time dad”, and that his athletic ability will help him win. “If that fails, I’m just going to go to the charm”. Oh yeah, and he says he looks like the Rock.

Finally, we head to Seattle to meet Joey, a makeup artist with a pseudo-alternative hairstyle. For some reason, we hear that she’s a liberal. Way to create a fanbase, girl! She wants to find some “hot liberal men in the house”. What the hell is this?

With the introductions over, they’re all “told” that they have one hour to pack. Come on, CBS, we’re smarter than that! Yeah, I’m no fan of watching them pack, especially having to listen to them talk nonsense. Frankie, in particular, with his whining about not being able to keep up with his sister’s career (including a phone call to her). Did you know she’s famous?

They’re all now shown on Julie’s stage. After going through a few of the usual catchphrases, she tells them they’re going to be on the “most twisted summer ever”, and the “most grueling and outrageous social experiment”. She notes that there’s a reason why there’s only eight of them, but they’ll be told later why.

After some canned applause, four (Cody, Amber, Donny, and Joey) head inside. Joey is the first in, and the two girls rush in to claim a bed. The boys take their time, and we get some down home talk from Donny. They reconvene in the kitchen to introduce themselves, and Cody loves Donny’s voice.

A bad cut takes us back to the stage, and the other four now run in. Paoloa is first with this crew, and Nicole says all she can think about is not peeing her pants (because that happens when she’s excited). Frankie and Joey compare hair colors, and there’s an awful attempt at a bad joke.

The eight then go tour the house, and they are questioning why there are only eight of them. Paloa knows this has to mean a twist.

The girls find the champagne, and introductions are then made. Cody is impressed with “Pow Pow” (Paola), and Frankie says that it’s an immediate red flag when Pow Pow says she’s a DJ. “She definitely knows who Ariana Grande is.” Ugh, really? “This girl could know who I am.”

The hayseed music kicks in when Donny introduces himself, and Nicole says she loves his outsider appeal. Pow Pow and Frankie both love Cody, though! “He’s so hot.”

Frankie claims to be 28 (he’s 31), and says he’s a Broadway chorus boy. Joey says they’re perfect “peacocks”. Devin jumps right in with the fact he’s a single dad, and that he had to quit baseball because of her. Amber loves him. “He’s tall, dark, and handsome. Just my type.”

Amber, Joey, and Nicole continue on with the introductions, but it’s not too exciting. Devin, though, thinks Joey is “smoking hot. She’s a ten!” Donny thinks he wants to work with Nicole, but can’t remember her name.

In case you forgot, there’s another eight people coming in. Devin says he wants to “circle the wagons” to be ready for them. Donny reads off an obviously-prepared toast about High Definition, and we head to our first commercial break.

When we return, Devin is telling Amber, Frankie, and Paola that they “have to stay tight” no matter what happens. They bring the other four in, because Devin wants these eight to be the first super-alliance of the season. Sure, that will work, and Joey admits in the diary room that she’s not too sure about this idea. Frankie, though, loves the idea, and wants to name them the “Crazy eight”! Devin then takes off his shirt, as do the rest of the boys for some crunches. What the hell? At least Donny is smart enough to refrain.

Devin and Donny are now alone, and Devin asks if he’s a fan of the show. Donny replies in a loud whisper, complete with a little lunge towards Devin, “every season”. He doesn’t want the rest to know, and Devin claims that he will keep the secret. His great plan is to have a secondary, top secret alliance with somebody nobody would expect, and Donny fits that category. Donny is so happy he feels like he won the “best beard contest at the county fair”.

Frankie and Cody sit down to play some chess, and Pow Pow comes up to hang out. “Is this the HOH room”, she asks as she walks by the door. “Oh my God, chess!” She doesn’t want any guys to form their own alliances, ala the Brigade. “I want it to be all about girl power this year”, she says.

She runs downstairs to tell the other girls, and they all agree a girl needs to win this year. “It is time for a girl to win, and that girl needs to be me”, says Amber. Pow Pow believes that Frankie and Cody will form an alliance, and they all admit their plan was to create Big Brother’s first all girl alliance. Yeah, with a little prompting from CBS. Pow Pow even has a name for the final four of girls - El Quatro. Nicole just wants to know what El Quatro means.

Julie then calls everybody together into the living room. Julie hints that more people will be coming in shortly, but one of them will be the first HOH of the season. Julie goes through the usual rules of being HOH, but adds that the HOH is not safe. Remember, it’s the “most twisted summer ever”. She repeats that HOH is not necessarily safe, and the backing track of drums increases in intensity. Frankie is confused. “There’s got to be something else”, he says, and Cody says he’s panicking.

After commercials, Pow Pow and Cody are talking. “In the real world, I can get any guy I want”, she says in the diary room. “But being in the Big Brother house, you have to really be careful because you don’t want to be a target if you’re going to start a showmance.” This doesn’t stop her from flirting with Cody a bit, though. “Cody is such a cute, good guy that I want to just go into bed with him. That would be cool.” Hey, this is the first filler segment of the season!!! (Oh wait, maybe the second after the key segments.)

Julie then calls for the house guests once again. She tells them to put on their swimsuits, as it’s HOH competition time. It’s a beach theme, which gives Frankie the opportunity to read the script that “it’s not an ordinary day at the beach”.

This is the clip that we got to see online last night, and “Go Fly a Kite” is a balance act on a rolling beam. If their “kite” falls, they are out. Cue the surf guitars! We get the usual diary room nothingness from most of them, but it is funny that Pow Pow falls immediately after saying her goal is to “stay focused”.

Joey is shown struggling, but surprisingly it’s the athlete who says the competition is hurting him. Joey falls next, though, and then “sunscreen” is sprayed on them. Nicole then falls, and we get some more footage of Pow Pow fantasizing about Cody. Donny almost falls, and then the platform changes directions.

After more commercials, Donny does indeed go down, followed by Devin. Frankie now believes that he can win. Cody now falls, and its now between Frankie and Amber. Keeping in mind what Julie said about the HOH not being safe, Amber just drops her rope and falls. Frankie is the first HOH of the season! Afterwards, they’re all still talking about what Julie said, and Frankie wants everybody to have his back. They all agree. “I’m freaking the Frankie out!” Ugh, please.

It’s time for Julie to explain this twist, and she calls everybody into the living room. She explains that a second group of eight will be coming in, and one of them will also be a HOH. “By the end of the week, only one HOH will be left standing”, she adds. “I’ll leave you with that.”

They’re all completely confused by this, especially Cody. Silly Joey thinks there’s another house.

Julie then explains what “Team America” means. The winner of the online vote for “who would you like to team up with an alliance” will be a part of a secret three-person alliance “controlled by you, America”. Over the next two weeks, the public will vote on these other two people, and they’ll be sent on secret missions. Tomorrow we will find out who won the first vote.

We get a little montage of the other eight before we end tonight’s show. Oh, and we hear the name of a certain redheaded monster from Frankie as they continue to babble as the credits roll.

So that's it for tonight. What did you think of the episode? Or Pow Pow? Or the nightmare that is Frankie? How about those twists? Let us know your thoughts!

 

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