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Big Brother Season 13, Episode 4 Recap

Somebody’s dream is about to be squashed tonight, and I couldn’t be happier. On the one hand you have Keith, failed star of dating shows whose plan of creating “Keith’s Girls” was extinguished moments after entering the house. On the other hand you have Porsche, whose reasoning for being on the show has nothing to do with prize money and all to do with this idiotic fantasy of having a film crew documenting her post-Big Brother life.

Truthfully, I could care less who heads home tonight, but it’s safe to say that we’ll NEVER hear from the evictee again. Keith will go back home and stammer out sermons in between chasing local girls with little self-esteem. Porsche’s future is destined to remain at that (non)-exclusive nightclub, where she’ll serve overpriced foo-foo drinks until a businessman twice her age makes her his second (or third) wife. What’s the future of the person who survives the evening? Look for them to be the first evictee after the Golden Key is turned in.

Before we get to that fantasy-extinguishing moment, we have to sit through a few minutes of filler, including a segment or two to make it look like either of them have a 50/50 shot of staying. After a overly-long intro and an intro by Julie, we get the expected reactions to Rachel’s decision to not use the veto. Nothing that’s said is worth repeating, except Porsche’s claim that she’s a strong competitor. Yeah, right.

Porsche and Keith have a conversation, and Keith is suddenly sweet-talking the twit. Porsche is having none of it, though. “You can tell Keith is lying when his lips are moving.” Oh snap! She lets him know that she’s prepared to handle anything that he tells the others.

We jump into the have/not room, and Dom says that he wants Porsche gone. Cassi wastes no time in agreeing, and Lawon says it also sounds cool to him. “They (vets) see Porsche as this weak twit”, Cassi says. In the diary room, Cassi admits that Keith has played a terrible game, but he’s a better choice to stay than Porsche.

The vets don’t agree, though. In the HOH, Rachel is saying that Keith has to go. They’ve finally realized that the numbers game doesn’t work for them, and Jeff thinks they need to go after Adam or Cassi’s vote. Working on that goal, the vets decide to socialize with the noobs. Oh God, I have to hear Rachel’s “Big Booty” bullshit again. For some reason, we also have to endure “Vegas Rachel” as she does some awful booty dancing, accompanied by a drum circle performed by the rest of the house.

Dominic is actually showing some smart, though, as he’s not buying the suddenly nice side that’s being shown by Rachel and the rest of the vets. “What are you trying to do? How are you trying to manipulate me, and what are you trying to get out of me?”

Ok, this segment goes on a bit too long, as Rachel starts calling Brendon “Bootie”. Brendon says that’s an affectionate name she has for him, but he doesn’t like the rest of the house knowing that. He calls her over, and after saying in the diary room that she’s no longer “a Vegas party girl”, he starts complaining to her for revealing that dumb name. Hell, it’s better than “Ashy Penis”. Ugh, he calls it “protecting Rachel”.

WTF? This is the most sanitized version of a fight I’ve ever seen, as the piano music jumps in as Rachel says “I love you” over and over. Finally, he starts whining, and it’s nothing like how it actually happened as they accentuate his “I love you” comments over his more hateful lines. He finally turns off the light to go to bed, saying he doesn’t care if she doesn’t sleep with him.

After a commercial break, we get part two of the romanticized version of Rachel fighting with Brendon. She complains about him being mean to her, and as always she apologizes over and over. He continues to whine, and finally snarkily says he accepts it. “You have a hot, beautiful fiancé who is in love with you…who is smart. Who calls you ‘bookie’. Is that the worst of your problems?” Wait, does Brendon have another fiancé. Hey CBS, tone down the acoustic guitars, and get rid of the anthemic crescendo when they make up. My God, this is the fucking worst segment in Big Brother history!

Back in love, Brendon decides to go to Shelly for a vote. Yeah, she’s an easy mark, saying its “awesome” to work with her beloved vets. Jeff says that he now has to go talk to Adam because he was a person Dick brought into the group. Jeff’s great idea is to have Adam name their alliance. Really? He comes up with nothing except “Adam’s Angels”. Ugh.

Now we’re back outside, and Cassi tells Shelly and Kalia that they have nothing to gain by booting Keith. Kalia doesn’t want to “rock the vote”, though, and Shelly is just confused because she’s playing both sides. She wants to know what she has to gain by keeping him, completely ignoring the numbers game. Cassi then moves on to Adam, who says he hasn’t promised his vote to anybody. In the diary room, Adam claims that this vote says whether you’re with the noobs or veterans. Um, Adam, you’re a noob. Think about it.

With another set of commercials down the drain, it’s time for Julie to ask dumb questions to the house. Oh wait, this could actually be good, as Julie has a message from Evel Dick. He says he’s alright, as is his girlfriend and family. He loves the game, and would have never left the house if there wasn’t an emergency. He apologizes to Daniele, saying they “get along the best when we’re on Big Brother playing together”. She doesn’t seem to be too interested, though. He then tells the rest of the house that he will be watching, and wants good gameplay, strategy, and fights. He ends with saying he misses most of them.

Julie then goes to Daniele and asks if she has something to say to him, and she has really little to say except that it is tougher since it is more than just gameplay. Julie presses for her to say “I love you”, but that’s too “awkward” for Daniele. Hmmm.

We then get to see clips of the have/have not competition, including Keith dry-humping the other boys. Yes, that’s actually pretty funny. Dominic is asked if it was worth it to have Keith on top of him. His answer is yes. Adam is then asked what it’s like to play with the vets, and once again his answer is not worth repeating.

Keith then gets to plead his case, and he starts by saying that Porsche “rocks”. Wait, what? He then adds the three things that are needed to make it through the house – have fun, never take things personally, and remember that it’s only a game. Porsche says thanks to everybody, and not much else.

It’s now time for the voting. Dominic is first, and votes to evict Porsche. Brendon votes to evict Keith, as does Jordan. Cassi, however, votes to evict Porsche. It’s tied as we go to commercials.

Lawon is the first to vote when we return, and his vote is against Porsche. It’s Jeff’s turn, and yes, he votes to evict Keith, as does Daniele (after saying she does love her father). Adam then comes in, and his vote is against Porsche. Kalia’s vote is against Keith, as does Shelly. Yes, this went as expected.

Julie announces that Keith has been evicted, and he’s all smiles as he hugs everybody. After watching the house mill around for a few seconds, Julie then begins by asking how shocked he was at being evicted. “Very shocked”, he replies. He does say that he would have done a few things different, and Julie adds that he wasn’t very smart in throwing the POV while on the block. She then asks what went wrong with his choice of Porsche as a partner. He does make sense here, though, saying that she broke their plan on all the noobs sticking together. Keith also says that the game is harder than he expected, and continues on with saying that falling for Porsche, who is hot, would have messed up his game even worse.

It’s time for the goodbye messages, and Cassi says he acted like he was on the “Dating Game”. Lawon says he acted like a “fool…BOOM!” Ugh, Rachel claims he underestimated “the power of Hurricane Brenchel. We flipped the script on you, and used all of your noobies against you!” Porsche ends the segment by whining about playing her, and points to her “you can look but you can’t touch” shirt. She really is a mini-Rachel.

With Keith gone, we can move on to the HOH competition. Those of us who watched the feeds the last couple of days have seen them practicing their golf game, and that’s exactly what they’re playing tonight. They have to hit their ball around a sand trap, with the winner the closest to a “hole in one”.

Rachel was allowed to choose the play order, and Dom’s the first shot. He hits a six, and Adam’s lands in the eight. Cassi’s shot goes too far, and ends up in the water…as does Shelly. Lawon goes nuts with force on his short, and also ends up in the water. Kalia ties Dominic by hitting a six, but Jordan takes the lead by hitting a three. Jeff doesn’t even try, and goes right into the water (reminiscent of throwing a comp for Jordan during his season?). Brendon also fucks up on purpose, making Jordan the HOH! Great job, noobs.

With a couple of minutes left in the show, Julie attempts to coax a Jordan-ism out of her. She delivers, thanking Jeff and Brendon for “letting me win…it’s a repeat from our season”. Porsche is asked how she feels about having the golden key, and her response is that it feels great. Julie then asks a supposed question from the viewers, and it’s to Shelly about missing her kid. I guess she has a stuffed puppy that reminds her of the family. “They’re the love of my life.” Adam is then asked who his favorite 90210 cast member is, and he does a metal roar as he screams “Donna Martin graduates!” Um, sure.

And the show is over. What did you think? Are you excited for Jordan’s HOH win? Are you going to be sick of the entire vet team? I know I am. Leave some comments on this week’s show.


Big Brother: Season 13, Episode 3 Recap

Before we commence with the recap of tonight’s show, apologies are in order for the lack of summary for the previous episode. I was all ready for the broadcast – my slingbox was running smoothly, my mixed drink was refreshed right before show time. I even had a great opening paragraph already written.

As expected, the show started with a recap of Thursday’s premiere…and boom, here comes the local affiliate jumping in with a weather warning. Ok, no big deal. I’m thinking I’d miss next to nothing. I was wrong. After a fourteen-minute filibuster, I was able to witness CBS’ edit of Brendon/Rachel banter…and boom, another break-in. Out of the first 23 minutes of the show, I saw three.

Sure, I could have switched to an online feed, or watched it later on Nah, I was already not in the mood, and those cut-ins just threw my rage to a new level. Before you obsessed Weather Channel viewers begin writing hate mail, you must realize a couple of things about the situation. First off, this THUNDERSTORM activity was in a remote part of our state that covered less than a percent or two of the viewing area’s population. Plus, our CBS affiliate also owns a CW station AND a channel devoted to WEATHER!!! Switch this garbage over to one of those channels and just run a crawl underneath.

Ok, enough whining. Tonight’s the night we learn why Evel Dick left the show (or at least CBS’ version of events), along with the POV competition and POV meeting. Ok, all we really have is Dick’s departure, as I expect lots of Brendon/Rachel and Jeff/Jordan filler. (BTW, there are NO storm warnings tonight!)

Oh yes, we have to begin with reactions to the nominations of Keith and Porsche. Although Rachel tells Porsche that she’s available to talk, Porsche is confused as to who she’s in a alliance with. Is it Dick or the whole veteran team? Ok, let’s face it – I could have ended the sentence at confused. Keith says “it’s no sweat to me…Porsche, you’re going home”. Rachel denies this, saying that she wants Porsche to have that…dum dum dum…golden key so she’ll vote whatever the vets want. Jeff adds that the nominations were Dick’s idea, and he really doesn’t give a shit. Dick verifies that they were his choices.

Porsche heads up to the HOH room after nominations, but Keith spots her and goes off on her in the diary room. Brendon confirms that she’s not the target. “Trust me.” Um, sorry Brendon. Who could be that stupid? Oh yeah, Porsche could. Brendon claims that she’s the only noob that the vets can trust. Porsche doesn’t help herself by wondering if they’re going to set it up so that Keith wins POV (um, she obviously doesn’t know the rules). Brendon condescendingly describes how it’s her best move to throw the POV.

After Porsche leaves, Daniele asks what just happened. Once again, Brendon has to explain the deal and how it’s the best thing for her. Daniele adds in the diary room that her dad probably made a deal with the worst person in the house. You think?

We move on to Keith sleeping, and Dom interrupts so they can do the Regulator dance. Ugh. Keith says he’s going to throw the veto “only because I want to get Porsche out of here”. Hmmm. Dom says if he throws it, he’ll definitely stay.

Now Keith is repeating everything to Kalia and Cassi. He tells them they can’t fall for it if they come to them after the veto and try to tell them how to vote. Kalia advises Keith to talk to the vets, but he thinks that’s crazy talk. He adds that if he doesn’t throw the veto, they’re probably going to be backdoored. At some point, Lawon has entered the room, and he also agrees.

Dick and Keith are now sitting outside, and Dick is called into the diary room. He’s apparently in there for hours, as we see the rest of the house sunbathing, eating, and washing up for the night. Finally, Porsche asks Jeff where he’s at. Suddenly, the house is getting worried, and Jeff searches the house for him. “Clearly, something is up.” That Jeff is a smart one.

Daniele is pacing the house when Rachel is then called into the diary room. Now the house knows there is a problem. Even Jordan has figured it out. “Where is Dick?”

After a commercial break, Jeff asks if they can start “conspiracy theories”. Rachel returns and calls everybody into the living room. She reads a statement from Big Brother that states that “due to an urgent personal matter, Dick had to leave the Big Brother game”. It goes on to state that Daniele then receives the first golden key, but she couldn’t give a shit.

Daniele is now in the diary room crying, actually worried about him. Somehow, though, Adam seems to be more upset. A tearful Daniele heads up to the diary room with Brendon and Rachel. Inside, she says that her dad “lives and breathes Big Brother. This is his life…he’s not just going to leave for nothing”. Somehow, Daniele thinks that she’s screwed, even though she has a four week pass. In fact, all of the vets are now screwed.

Jordan enters the room and reports that Keith was smiling about the situation. Tough guy Brendon threatens to go down after him. Um, yeah. Rachel actually talks him down, and as Jeff enters he also tells him to mellow out. Somehow, they’re all screwed by Dick’s departure, but Jeff thinks it’s all crazy talk. The conversation just keeps going around and around. Jeff says they just need to “knuckle up” and win every competition. Gotta hand it to him. He’s the only voice of reason in the room.

Meanwhile, Keith is celebrating downstairs, and bragging that he’s going to make his move on “Danny”. Shelly is pissed that he’s so excited about something that could be a horrible deal for another person. Keith, though, is getting too excited. He’s already pissed at Porsche (obvi), but now his new enemy is Kalia for telling him that he needs to talk to the vets.”I’m going to be the hero. I’m going to save the day.” Really?

All of the noobs are gathered into the have-not room, and I really can’t understand a word he’s saying except that he thinks he’s “exposing” Kalia and Porsche. Kalia is pissed. Lawon doesn’t get it either, and even Dominic is having second thoughts about Keith. He points out that they now have the numbers, and that he should just relax. He really is a dumbshit.

So it’s now time to pick the POV players, but first Daniele is handed her golden key…and, of course, she whines about it. However, she’s been having some second thoughts, and is going to use these three weeks to “build personal relationships with all these people”. Good move, Junior Dick!

Jeff and Jordan are the “wild card” choices for POV, and Brendon couldn’t be happier. Rachel also chooses Adam to be the host of the competition. The vets all head upstairs and decide it’s probably a good idea to remind Porsche that she needs to throw the competition. Porsche says that she wants nobody out of the house more than Keith, and somehow Brendon manages to pump himself up one more time with some comment about how he’d even be great at rocket science. Really?

It’s time for the competition, and Adam is dressed as a cop, with the rest of the competitors in superhero leotards. I’m going to refrain from Jordan’s dumb comment…and also Keith’s. One player must grab puzzle pieces and hand it the other who is hanging in the air, who then places the piece on a “skyscraper”…but before it begins we again have to hear how Porsche must throw it. Oh yeah, and that Keith is doing the same thing. WE GET IT, CBS!

Ugh, the play by play of Brendon is even worse than Jordan’s inane commentary (and game play). The same with Keith and Porsche believing they’re pulling a scam on the other. Somehow, though, Jeff and Jordan are doing even worse than Keith and Porsche.  Thankfully, Brendon and Rachel finally put us out of this misery…and as usual, they act like they’ve won the greatest competition ever. “Eh heh heh heh he”. Ugh.

With the competition over, Brendon and Rachel head back up to the HOH to celebrate. Jeff joins them, and Rachel asks if they should change the nominations. Brendon, of course, wants to hold court over the whole house…”reminding them that we...have complete control”. Yes, he thinks that not only should everybody come up and kiss the ring that also from that moment on the entire house should come to them with their nominations. Yeah, he didn’t learn anything from the previous season.

They begin by having Adam and Dominic up into the HOH. Brendon informs them that if Rachel doesn’t change the nominations, that means that next week they can’t go up or also be up for POV. I can almost see the incredulous smile grow on Adam’s fat mug. Adam still agrees, but Dominic is pissed. “I wasn’t intimidated before they won, and I’m not intimidated after they won.” Lawon and Kalia are then brough in and given the same speech, and they also just nod their head in agreement (and laughing on the inside).

The speech is also repeated to Cassi and Shelly, and Cassi dares to speak up. She says she knows that they have a bond with Jeff and Jordan, and would always choose them over her. Shelly just stares off into space, adding only that there’s “no word breaking”.

Rachel then informs Keith that she’s thinking of using the veto, and asks what he would give her if that indeed happened. Keith claims that he’ll NEVER nominate her if she saves him. Really? Rachel backtracks and says the deal is only for the next two weeks. In the diary room, though, he says he has no worries because he’s “got the numbers”. Ok, Rachel, stop when you’re ahead. She doesn’t, though, and threatens to bury him if he goes back on his word.

It’s finally that anticlimactic time. Rachel and Brendon continue to spout nonsense about possibly changing their nominations, and the rest of the house responds accordingly. Finally, the rest of the house is brought in for the ceremony, and, as expected, it’s not used.

That’s it for tonight. What did you think of the episode? Will Keith survive? Will Brendon’s ego make his head explode? Will Porsche grow an IQ or two? Let us know what you think!


Big Brother Season 10 Finale!!!

Well, it’s finally here – the finale of season ten of Big Brother. 71 days ago, we had our first glimpse of the thirteen contestants, and tonight we crown the winner. Will it be Memphis, the “mixologist”, who for the most part skated by while allowing others to do his dirty work, or Dan, the “good” Catholic, who somehow made it to the end despite continually creating drama inside the house.

There are plenty of other lingering questions as we commence the broadcast. Will Michelle’s meeting with Dan sway her to vote for him? Will the producers allow Jerry’s ego to grow by giving him the swing vote? How will the house react to the news that Dan was America’s Player for one week? Will April and Ollie discover that everybody saw their late night backdoor adventures? Most importantly, how hot will my girl Angie look tonight?
Once again, I’m surprised that CBS only gave up an hour for material that could have easily filled two. Hell, the ratings were even up this year. Instead, we’re stuck with an overly-crammed show that’s marred with an extended opening that recaps what everybody already knows. Actually, this final recap was better than what we’ve seen all season, as it really does tell the story of the season.

Finally, we get to the actual show, and we jump right into Jerry’s entrance into the jury house. Instead of the usual set inside the house, we see them walk outside and discuss who they want to see show up.

Keesha, still hurting over her eviction, wants the final juror to be Memphis, while Ollie babbles again about Dan “disrespecting” him. Libra says she’s “thank the dear Lord” if it was Jerry as he wasn’t the “gingerly old man” he wanted others to believe he was. Renny’s not happy with that idea. “To spend one more night with that man? Please.” I miss her.

As Keesha talks about how they “floated the old man” along, the codger shows up to hear Libra talk smack about him. They all immediately grow silent, and Renny is clearly not happy. “Are you glad to see me”, he asks…to more silence. I love it!
Michelle is the first to realize that if Jerry is with them, then the “two evil people” are the finalists. You get an A for the night, Manchelle. Oh wait, she’s not done, as she’s all excited to tell Jerry exactly what he already knew – that Dan and Memphis had an alliance. “They played us to the hilt”, Jerry drones on. “We could have handled them one at a time. Two of them we couldn’t handle.”
Keesha’s had enough, and complains to Jerry about putting her and Dan up instead of Memphis. “I had an agreement with Memphis…and Memphis didn’t keep his word”, Jerry responds. Renny doesn’t buy it, and once again we get to hear Jerry yell, “will you let me talk?” Oh boy, this is fantastic watching these two go back and forth.
It’s now Jerry’s turn to say the obvious, as he tells them they have to choose the “worst of two evils”. Renny complains that Memphis is the “most insensitive person I’ve ever met in my life. Memphis is very cunning, conniving, insensitve.” Keesha agrees, saying that Memphis survived by being cold-hearted, and that Dan’s best move was “getting everybody to like him”. Michelle says that she would have respected Dan more if he “had just told me why he was putting me up” instead of his roulette game. April wasn’t there, but she certainly has an opinion on how embarrassing that moment was for everybody involved. “Talk about heartless.” Ugh. Keesha responds that she doesn’t have “bitter feelings towards Dan”. It’s funny (and scary) how Libra is suddenly the voice of reason in this group, as she puts it all in perspective as that’s how you have to play the game.
Since nobody was talking about Michelle for at least two minutes, she has to again bring up how she was backdoored by Dan. April asks her to “elaborate” on her trip with Dan for Jerry’s benefit. She babbles on about it, until it finally clicks into Jerry’s head that Dan was playing her for a vote. “Ohhhhhhhhhhhh!” All of this talk just leads Keesha to repeat what we’ve already heard about how it just means that Dan played the game the best. “He definitely worked a lot harder.” I think we know how she’s voting. Jerry actually makes a good point, as he says that Memphis allowed Dan to do all of the dirty work, but was just as responsible. They really are all talking in circles, though, as Keesha again talks about carrying Memphis. April actually agrees with Keesha. Mark that one down, although it means to April that Memphis played a tougher game. Renny disagrees.

Thank God that’s over, and after commercials we get the jury questions. We start with Libra, who asks Dan what his biggest move was. He says it was backdooring Michelle, which was hard because he likes her. “This game is not about liking someone. I had to get someone out of the house that could probably beat me in a competition and probably beat me in the final two.” Manchelle doesn’t look like she’s buying it.
We don’t get to see her question to Memphis, as we move on to Apirl’s question to Memphis. She says that since they never talked to each other, why should she give him the money? “I don’t have anything against you, but I feel like we just got separated at the beginning of this game, and we never kind of got back together. I wasn’t trying to put up a front with you. I’ve been a straight shooter.” That comment didn’t work very well, as we can hear groans from the entire jury.
Michelle’s up next, and her question is for Dan. Oh, she’s clever (not). “We’re going to play a little jury house roulette.” Oh, god. She asks him to tell the jury why she chose her over everybody else for the trip, which is the first that Memphis has heard of this. The followup is that on the trip he said the move was his alliances’ idea, so he needs to also explain that.
Dan explains that he chose her because he treated her “the dirtiest”, and just “wanted to make amends” with her. As for the role of everybody else in the plan, he says it was his idea but he couldn’t do it without everybody’s help. Renny and Keesha don’t seem so pleased with him anymore.

Oh wait, with Michelle we get questions to both finalists. She asks Memphis about their supposed alliance, and why she should award the money to a person who never won HOH and supposedly threw a bunch some competitions. His answer is weak. “Maybe winning HOH wasn’t a good plan for me. I’m still here.” He also talks about how tough of a player she is, and that he needed “convincing” to jump onboard the plan to evict her.
Up next we have Ollie, and of course his question is for Dan, who jokes that “this will be a tough one”. Yes, he talks about the deal they made that led to Michelle’s eviction, and why he would put “your girl” (Monica) into this deal. Dan explains that he only had five minutes left in him, so he had to come up with something to make him drop. “I had to do whatever it took, whether it was shameful or not.”
Renny asks Memphis to name “one thing you did for me in the game”. There’s an awkward silence before he finally stumbles some stuff about “giving myself”. Oh, that’s not going to work very well as Renny and Keesha laughs. He continues on about how he never did anything behind her back, which leads Keesha to complain that he’s “skirting” around the question.
Keesha now addresses her “best friend” Memphis. She wants to know why he picked Jerry over her. “I thought we were very close.” Memphis says it was the hardest move in the house to vote her out, but he had to do it for gameplay. “It was the only way that I can get to this point. It bothers me that I may have ruined a friendship that I’ll never get back.”
Finally, we conclude with Jerry, who for some reason complains about Dan’s arrogance whenever he won a competition. “Do you have respect for any of us in the jury house.” Obviously, Dan responds that he has lots of respect for everybody, and that the incident with throwing the card was just a celebration of finally winning something. He does understand how Jerry may have taken those actions in a bad light. “I hope you respect me, because I respect you, Dan”, Jerry concludes.

Somehow, Jerry is the only other person to have both questions shown, we now have to endure him whining about his failed alliance with Memphis. “Who would you have picked, me or Dan?” Dan’s intrigued by this question, and Memphis again stumbles on how he would not have known until that opportunity arose. Dan throws in a comment that maybe Memphis didn’t want to make that decision, and possibly threw that final HOH. Keesha gets a good laugh out of this.

They now get final statements to the jury. Memphis goes first, and talks about how he had a “business plan” to make it to the end. To clear things up, he says he only threw two HOH’s. Keesha again groans when he says he was honest the entire time.

Dan now stands, and tells a story about how he walked into the house knowing that he didn’t excel in many of the ways everybody else did. He had to come up with ways to remain in the house, and aligned himself with people for that very reason. He says that he wanted Michelle and Ollie to be upset with him, so that he could help Memphis make it to the end with him. When he concludes, Libra says Dan gave a good speech. April doesn’t agree. Imagine that.

With the jury questioning complete, they are introduced to the studio audience. Renny gets the biggest applause, and milks it. Jerry’s applause is very subdued.
After commercials, Dan and Memphis are introduced back in the house. Dan is asked to say one word about the jury questioning, and gives us about three sentences. Memphis compares it to a firing squad. “It was intense, but it was good to express your feelings towards the people you had to evict.”

Wasting no time, the jurors begin their voting. Libra begins, and babbles nonsense about “going crazy” as she inserts her key. April is next, and thanks them for the experiences “they all shared”. Michelle babbles about it being a “crazy ride”, and Dan responds something about a “princess from Providence”. Ollie talks about remembering this experience for the rest of their lives.
Next up is Renny, and talks about how the decision was easy “as a businesswoman”. She goes on about not forgetting the little things and ‘human spirit”. As expected, she ends with a flourish. Keesha says she loves them both to death, and considers them both “little brothers”.

Finally, it’s Jerry, who suddenly has a “lot of respect” for both of them, and his vote was “based on kindness”. He promises to explain it later.

Now we get the moment I’ve been waiting for – the initial evictees, including my girl Angie!!! Oh boy, she looks as beautiful as always.

Brian is asked about being close to Dan, and predicting Memphis as a potential winner. He talks about how they both never made it personal, and that it “was just a game to get you both where you both are”. He tells Ollie that he was surprised by his “personal reaction”, and also Michelle’s fight with Libra that included her whining about Libra’s mothering skills.

He also points out April and Michelle’s personal attacks that included making fun of their looks, which Manchelle denies.

Julie notes that Steven was nodding his head, and he’s asked who acted the most surprising. He says that Jerry’s reactions were disappointing, especially his actions against Dan. To show what he’s talking about, they play a clip of Jerry’s actions after Michelle’s HOH victory. Jerry is given a chance to respond, and talks about using religion to break his word. (Good to see that somebody made note of the “real” Jerry.)

Julie then tells everybody that despite the conspiracy theories, there was no plant in the house, but for one week somebody was America’s Player. They show the clip of Dan getting the news. Michelle feels vindicated. Ollie is heard saying America’s “stupid” when they show the clip of Jessie’s eviction.

Jessie is asked to respond to what he just saw, but he wants to respond to America instead of Dan. He thanks America for some reason, and talks about his appearance in the house as a gorilla.

What, no question for Angie???? This is not right. Julie tells the jury about the $25,000 prize for favorite jury member. I bet Michelle believes she has that wrapped up.

Finally, it’s time for Julie to pull the keys. Libra voted for Dan, as does April, Michelle, and Ollie. Dan wins!!!
Dan’s girl hugs him as he walks out, as do the rest of the contestants.

When we get back from commercials, we see that Dan received all of the votes.

Julie reveals the favorite juror winner, and although Jerry won second place the winner was…Keesha? What an upset! How did Renny not get at least second place?

Well, that’s it for this season. It’s been fun. See you next summer? Or maybe next spring?


Big Brother Season 10, Episode 26

Tonight’s the night! Who will become the final HOH of the season, and who will they decide will stand next to them in the finals? Will the terribly-named Renegades alliance make it to the end, or will Jerry somehow find a way to avoid the jury house? We will see in the next sixty minutes.
When the show went off the air two nights ago, the three contestants were strapped onto the top of old-school airplanes. It makes sense that this is exactly where we begin tonight’s show after Julie’s battle with the teleprompter. Dan says that their “whole plan” depends on him winning part one of the three-part contest, while Jerry says that he needs to win to give Memphis some confidence that “he made a good choice” in keeping him over Keesha. Oh, Jerry.
The planes start to move around a bit, and then water begins to spray on them. Memphis says that he originally thought it was going to be an easy competition, but when they started swaying he realized that all he could do was attempt to “hang on”.
Dan plays up to the fake fight that they orchestrated just minutes before heading outside for this competition by babbling about how it was a “great game move” to evict Keesha. “I just didn’t think you’d do it.”
This gives the producers a chance to replay the clip of Keesha being evicted, and Jerry is all smiles because “it was the first time that somebody actually did what they promised to do for me”. Oh, Jerry. Memphis says it was difficult to evict her, but it makes sense because Jerry is “75, and he doesn’t see so well, and he doesn’t hear so well. We felt that we had a better chance at beating Jerry than beating Keesha in the final HOH competition.”
We again see Dan’s embrace of Keesha as she left the house, and his whisper admission of meeting up with Michelle on his luxury trip. Dan says he told because it meant that he “had now been completely honest with Keesha”, and that saying “finish it” meant that it was up to her to ensure he had Michelle’s vote. Too bad that I don’t believe she understood what he meant.
He goes on to claim that throwing that last veto comp was “probably the best move that I made in this game”, because of the anger it provoked in Keesha. We again see the fake fight between Dan and Memphis, and Dan’s promise to not take him to the final two. Memphis says he thought it was funny, and that “Jerry probably is sitting on cloud nine right now”.
Yeah, he is. “Memphis and Dan now feel betrayed by each other, and it is really leading to quite a riff. I’m hoping they stay in that mode, and if one of them wins HOH they’ll take me to the final two.” Oh boy, Jerry.
Dan and Memphis keep up this charade in the backyard, with Memphis talking about skateboards and Dan replying that he used to “stay on them for twelve hours until your friend stabs you in the back”. Memphis can barely hold back a laugh as they keep up this banter. Jerry is still buying it, saying that the more they talk like this “the better for me”.
Just then, a big gust of wind is blown on them, and Jerry loses his balance and falls. Dan slyly smiles as the old man gets up and walks away. They both wink at each other, and Memphis says that he was “surprised that he fell so quickly”.
With Jerry now out, Dan says the plan is for Memphis to fall to give this round to Dan. Memphis says he “overplayed the card”, though, after another dumb football analogy about staying up all night. Dan gets a bit perturbed, though, as he doesn’t fall as quickly as they had planned, and as the planes start moving more violently Dan is struggling to stay up. At one point, he comes close to falling, as Memphis continues to stand still.
Finally, Memphis does fall, but he admits that he stayed up just to “give the illusion” he was playing to win. “I didn’t want to take the chance of Jerry finding out that I threw it. That would ruin pretty much everything.”
With the game over, Dan hops down and celebrates, while Jerry babbles about how now he has to go against Memphis to see who ends up in the last part of the contest. Memphis and Dan continue to act like they’re upset with each other in hopes that Jerry throws part two. Memphis does give a little wink to the camera as he runs past to let us know he’s happy with the results.
We’re now in the kitchen, and Jerry thanks Memphis for choosing him over Keesha. “I felt that it was me against the world from almost day one, and I’m really enjoying Memphis right now. There’s a nice side to him that in the whole time in the house I really didn’t get to enjoy.”
Jerry probably wouldn’t say those words if he could hear Memphis and Dan celebrate how they’re “one step closer” to their goal. “We’re going to have to flip to see who sends him home”, says Memphis. Dan’s only worry is going against Jerry in the final round, and Memphis responds that they’re not going to let that happen. Dan sort of overstates the case when he says in the diary room that if Jerry wins the second heat, “all my hard work is going right down the toilet”.

After commercials, we move on to round two with Dan walking into the living room with two sets of boxing gloves. Jerry’s a bit concerned. “I was hoping that it wasn’t going to be that I had to actually box Memphis because I don’t want to die at this age.” Oh, Jerry.
The two are put into second rooms, and brought out one at a time. Memphis goes first, and he comes out to play a game where he has to set up each HOH and nominees for every week in the house. What this has to do with boxing is not very clear, although the cardboard cutouts of the evicted contestants wearing boxing gloves are pretty cool.
Oh, I get it. He has to punch the people that weren’t nominated of HOH, leaving the three that were up. The producers alternate between showing Memphis and Jerry competing, and Memphis definitely had a much quicker spring in his step than Jerry. Of course, that’s to be expected, because in case you didn’t know Jerry is 75 years old!
They both talk about how this is the most important challenge of the season, and the slow-moving Jerry has no problems with round one while Memphis had to go back and change a couple of choices.

Memphis continues to have problems in round two, but finally gets it correct. He says that he knew all of the HOH’s, but was confused at times with the nominations.

Wow, they’re really making it look like Jerry was doing well in this game.
Wait, maybe they’re not giving Jerry such a good edit, as he has problems with round three. Memphis continues to struggle in round four, as does Jerry. There really is no quickness in his step, while Memphis sprints to make his choices.

Memphis is really on a roll, but they make it look like Jerry is doing just as well. After he completed the task, Memphis says that he was disappointed in his performance. Yet when we see the times, Memphis wins with a time of 8:35, compared to Jerry’s 51:22. Wow, what a fantastic edit Jerry received during the competition.

Dan struggles to not laugh when Jerry’s time is revealed, but lets it loose in the diary room. “Memphis, you just slaughtered the old man.” Memphis babbles that he’s “glad that the Renegades are successful”. While Jerry drops his drawers and says that he’s embarrassed, the Renegades do their silly little hand clap in another room. “Embarrassing”, complains Jerry. Dan says his plan is to beat Memphis in the final round, but Memphis says he wants to win because he has yet to win a HOH.
Back to the live show, and Julie now interviews with the final three. Julie begins by teasing Jerry for his time, and he claims it was because of that fall into the pool the week before. “I got water in my brain.” Julie follows it up by asking about his fate with the other two.
Julie then asks Memphis about how tough it was to evict Keesha two days ago. He admits that it was a tough task, but “this game is business, and she didn’t fit in the plan”. Dan is then asked about how the mood in the house has changed, and he babbles about how they “can smell the half million dollars”.

Yes, we get jury house footage again! Damn, we don’t get to see Renny’s entrance, but we do get to see her play cards with Libra and Michelle. Oh, that poor old broad! Renny is pissed at their idiocy. “Being in the jury house sucks! But it’s all good because I’m a good sport. We’re losers, and that’s why we’re here. Being in the jury house, you have to suck it up and enjoy the house.” Michelle notes that the next person to walk in will “find it interesting that she got taken on a luxury competition that they didn’t know about.” Oh, won’t she be surprised.

April talks about how the one person she doesn’t want to see is Jerry show up, and you can see that Renny is holding her tongue. We now see Keesha walk in just as April is babbling that she hopes that’s the person who walks in. “I think its karma.” Um, what?
Keesha hugs Renny, as April and Michelle look on scowling. April doesn’t wait to start whining. “Keesha has done a lot of backstabbing to me. I really don’t respect her game.” Keesha informs everybody about how she was screwed by Memphis. “He’s a coward.”

Michelle butts in by saying “I know a lot”, and Keesha responds by saying “I know you do. You went on a trip with Dan.” Michelle now realizes that “Dan knows what he’s doing. He did a good job by having Keesha not liking Memphis.”

They throw in the DVD, and both Michelle and April are entertained by Keesha’s exit. April wants Jerry to win the money because she doesn’t like their cockiness, and Renny says that she warned Keesha that they weren’t going to take her to the end. We see Dan’s whisper to Keesha, and now it doesn’t seem so clear that his sucking up worked on her as she complains about how he was just working for her vote. “Dan’s smart. He’s playing the game. I think he’s a great player.”

It’s now time for the final competition of the year. Will Memphis throw it to Dan? As usual, it’s the jury statements quiz. The first question is from Libra, and Dan gets the first point. April’s question is about who coasted in the game, and Memphis gets it right this time by guessing himself.

Michelle’s question is about the best strategic move in the game, and they both guess that she picked backdooring her…which is correct. Ollie’s question is about his fatal mistake in the game, and they both choose “trusting Dan”, which is shockingly incorrect.
Question five is from Renny, and what irritated her the most. Dan guesses its Jerry’s dentures, and Dan gets the point. Keesha wraps it up with a question about her most uncomfortable moment, and Dan selects the night before her eviction…and wins!!! Goodbye, Jerry!
Or is it? Julie points out that Dan has surprised us before. Jerry gives his speech first, and he babbles about how hard he’s played the game and that he should be considered because he never broke his word except when he was forced to nominate Brian.
Memphis now stands up, and babbles about how it’s been a wild ride, and that there are times “that you can look somebody in the face and see if they’re a true renegade”. Oh boy. Dan then stands, and after talking about how tough this is, he evicts Jerry.

After Jerry walks out, the two jump all over each other and again do their stupid hand shake. Julie’s first question is about the “fight” between Dan and Memphis, and why Dan still chose Memphis over him. He just talks about how much time they spent, and he admits that he believes they made an agreement to stick together.
Julie then asks if Dan made a mistake by choosing Memphis, and Jerry still believes that he will ultimately be the deciding vote. We end with the goodbye messages, and Dan kisses his ass despite their “ups and downs”. Memphis gives him props with putting up with all of the craziness in the house, and he does consider him a friend. Julie ends it by asking about whether the house was everything he thought it was, and he tearfully says that it was.
Before we conclude with a final interview with Dan and Memphis, CBS shows a promo about how we get to vote for our favorite jury member to receive $25,000. Go, Renny!
Julie congratulates the Renegades, and Dan gives his love to all of the “Renegade Moms and Dads and girlfriends”. Ugh. Memphis just adds that it’s “crazy”. And that’s it for tonight! See you on Tuesday for the finals!


Big Brother Season 10, Episode 25 Recap

Here we go with what can only be described as the beginning of the end. After we view what some will ultimately describe as a surprising eviction (except to those viewing the feeds), we’ll commence with the first of three competitions that will crown the final HOH. In exactly one week, we will see who is the winner of season ten of Big Brother!
Don’t forget, there will also be what should be an interesting meeting between Dan and Michelle, thanks to his luxury competition win. I’m sure I’m not the only person whose not looking forward to seeing that shrew once again.
After Julie reads the cue cards, we start the show with the reaction to the nominations of Memphis and Jerry. Of course, we do, as we have all season…and every season before this. Dan babbles again about the Renegade Alliance, and how this nomination is to hide the obvious from the other two. Memphis says they did this so that “Dan (can) get Keesha’s trust, and Jerry will come to me to go to war with Dan and Keesha. If this all works out, then me and Dan will control this house.”
Keesha is seen hugging Dan, and says in the diary room that “it’s really nice to not be on the block”. Yeah, we know it “sucks” when you’re nominated. She’s buying into the idea that Dan may prefer her over Memphis.
Jerry also falls hook, line, and sinker (to borrow one of his clichés) to their move. “Dan betraying Memphis for the second time allows me now to go to Memphis to try to make an agreement to go to the final two. I think Dan has a commitment to Keesha to keep her in the game.”
Sure enough, Jerry approaches a reclining Memphis and asks him “if he’s serious about going all the way”. Memphis jumps up and complains to Jerry how Dan keeps pissing him off. Memphis laughs as Jerry walks away, and Memphis talks about how “all their plans are falling into place. It makes you feel confident.”
Meanwhile, Keesha is upstairs with Dan, and asks him if Memphis knew he was putting him up. “I told him like real late.” He also says that Memphis was a little upset, and Keesha adds that it was a bit awkward after the meeting was over. She thinks that the two of them have a connection that the others don’t, and that it’s “rare that people actually have each other’s backs”. Oh, you poor deluded bombshell.
The watch Jerry and Memphis on the spy cam (actually, it clearly looks overdubbed), and Keesha complains how “you’ve got Jerry putting stuff into everybody’s ears”. Dan reminds Keesha that the veto competition is really important, and then again repeats it to us in the diary room. Yes, we get it! He does add that if Jerry or Keesha win, they’ll be able to influence how it’s used.
We move back to Jerry and Memphis, and Jerry says that “all I ask is that I’m not being played for a fool…because she’s much too happy right now”. Memphis nonchalantly assures him, and again points out that it’s all about the POV. “You’re my only hope, baby”, Jerry strangely shouts.
The Renegades finally meet up in the HOH, and again we see a badly overdubbed spy cam as Dan asks about Jerry’s questioning in the kitchen. They all have a good laugh over his constant babbling. “I tell you, it will be a great pleasure if I get to send his ass out the door.” Dan again talks about the importance of the veto competition.

After the commercials, everybody but Jerry is sitting outside talking about Dan’s trip out of the house. He’s then called to the diary room, and he puts on a blindfold to make his way to the helicopter. In the limo and the helicopter, he marvels at various sights. He does admit that he’s a bit concerned about meeting up with Michelle, and hopes that the limo and helicopter ride will help calm her down about him.

He finally lands, and we now see her coming in. Dan says that she has no idea who she’s meeting, but that somebody from the house selected her. “I think she’d expect any one of the house guests to select her except for me.” He hides behind the helicopter, and jumps out to surprise her.

Dan says that she has yet to see the “charming” Dan, and that this may be what could swing her vote. He makes a joke in his prayer, and tells us his plan is to pump her with wine. He tells her that the rest of the house doesn’t know about the meeting, and that Jerry is suspicious. She tells us that Dan told her she was picked because he felt bad about her Hawaii trip being taken away. Ok, Michelle, for the last time, it wasn’t taken away. You lost the competition. She admits that she doesn’t quite believe him, though, but is happy to be at the beach.
He asks her if she hates him, and she asks if everybody knew of the plan. He admits that the other four did know, and that the move also benefited them (but he’s not throwing them under the bus). She seems to be buying this. Catholic boy, you’re good. He asks her what would happen if it came down to him and Memphis, and Michelle thinks she could sway people his way. We end the segment with shots of them swimming and kayaking. Ugh. (BTW, this trip is taken out of order from the actual show. This trip happened after the veto competition.)

It’s now time for the veto competition, and they walk out to see the “Stairway to Veto”. They have to walk up steps, and pick a name that matches the two clues on either side of the steps.
Before we begin, we have to hear one more time all the babble about the importance of this competition…although Dan says it’s in his best interest to not win. What would be best for him is for Memphis to win “to get some blood on his hands”.

They’re all pretty even at the beginning, and Keesha brags that she’s good at “clues”. Memphis and Jerry aren’t so sure, and both seem to be struggling. Dan is plugging along, though, and is worried because he can’t see how far everybody else is. Once he gets to the top, he realizes that he has to slow down, and purposely starts putting up the same names to indicate to the others that he’s not doing well.
Memphis and Keesha are pretty close to each other, but Memphis gets to the final slot first. Dan continues to pretend he’s playing, and Memphis finally selects the correct answer to win the veto!
Jerry again says that he has no allies in the game, but he needs Memphis to save him. “Do I trust him to do it? I don’t know.” Keesha, though, is worried that Memphis won’t honor their final two deal.
The Renegades again meet up in the HOH to give their stupid handslap and jump around congratulating themselves. Memphis, though, says that they have to “make an educated decision” about who to evict. Uh oh, Keesha. Dan says they now have to think about who will do better in the final HOH competitions. Again, uh oh, Keesha. They both agree that Jerry will do awful in the endurance competition. Ohnoes, Keesha.
Speaking of Keesha, she shows up at the HOH and immediately asks Memphis if he’s going to vote her out. They all have a good laugh at it, and Dan points out that now he has to put her up. “My fate lies in your guys’ hands, again.” Oh yes, it’s funny, Keesha, but will the joke be on you. She does give a second glance, though, when Memphis tells her it’s a good thing she hasn’t unpacked from the last eviction. Suddenly, the room goes quiet, and Keesha heads downstairs.
We now see Keesha doing her toe nails, and it suddenly comes to her little brain that they are going to evict her. “I don’t want to be cut off right now. (It’s) way too close.” She heads up to the HOH and again asks if she’s being evicted. She looks at Memphis and says, “I can tell by the look on your face. You’re getting rid of me. I can tell by the way you’re acting.” Memphis denies it, but she has it figured out. Dan adds “you guys?” to remind Keesha that it’s Memphis who chooses the eviction this week, and Keesha wants to be told if that’s the case. “Whoever sends me out of here better not think they’re getting my vote, that’s for damned sure. (They) better not think I’m not going to do anything I can to change their minds in the jury house, too.” She leaves, and Dan just says “holy shit”.
Wow, I can’t believe they’re showing this clip! Memphis heads downstairs and asks for a hug, but Keesha refuses. She again asks if he’s going to tell her, or at least tell her why, but all Memphis will say is that he’s sorry. Memphis heads out to the living room, and Keesha follows him out to confront both of them. “I’m so stupid. I stuck up for both of you! And you’re keeping Jerry!” (To see the entire segment, go search on
Dan attempts to tell Keesha that he had no knowledge of this plan, and that he’s upset about it. “This whole time I’ve been trying to find a way to keep you.” Memphis listens as she continues about how she’s “always had his back”. In the diary room, Memphis admits that this eviction could “be a $500,000 decision”. Could he be having second thoughts as he overhears Keesha saying she’d never vote for him?

We now head to the living room, and Julie Chen shows the clip of Jessie dressed as the gorilla. Keesha doesn’t seem too amused this time. Ok, she finally cracks a smile. For some reason, Julie notes that she didn’t get along with Jessie when he was in the house, so what would she have said to him if she knew he was the gorilla? “I probably wouldn’t have been so giddy.” Memphis is then asked about his guess of “fruitless exit” in the luxury competition. He knows it was awful.
Dan is then asked about his trip. He says it was awesome, and that being a Midwestern kid it was great to see everything. Finally, Jerry is asked about being on the block for the fourth time. Jerry tries to crack a joke about buying the house. Yeah, it falls flat. Well, Julie laughs.

It’s now time for the veto meeting and eviction. Obviously, Memphis decides to take himself off the block. Jerry stands up and babbles his usual stuff about being in the house. Keesha then says that she has nothing to say to Memphis, but wants to say something to a visibly uncomfortable Dan. “I want to thank you so much for being there for me the last couple of days. It’s been really rough, and I don’t know what I would have done without you. So I want to wish you good luck in this game.”
With that said, it’s now time for Memphis to evict one of the two. Guess who he chooses? Yes, it’s Keesha. She hugs Jerry and Dan, who hands her a message and whispers something in her ear. “Finish it.” What does Memphis think of this exchange?
Wow, we see Dan and Memphis arguing as we wait for the interview with Keesha. “You’re out of your mind if you think I’m taking you!” Is this a Renegades show, or the real thing? Jerry doesn’t say a word.

Keesha is asked by Julie what Dan whispered as she walked out, and she says he confided that he took Michelle on the trip. She says it’s “huge”, but at least she’s smart enough to know that it’s for her vote. As for what he handed her, it ended up just saying “hot” on the bottom of a rubber ducky.
Time for a tough question from Julie – well, sort of a tough question. What did Keesha think of Memphis evicting her? “I was shocked” is the obvious answer. “I figured it out last night on my own. Jerry was acting too calm in the house. When Jerry is flustered, he usually shows it. He’s not good at hiding his emotions. Jerry was very calm, so I knew that Jerry knew that he was told he was safe.” She adds that she’s very hurt, because she’s always been there for him, and even found votes at one point to save him.
We end, as always, with the goodbye messages. Memphis says that “this is very hard” but apologizes, and says it only makes sense for him. He hopes that she forgives him. Jerry claims that it would be a “surprise” to him if she sees this because it would show that her “alliance wasn’t good to the end”. Dan puts up a good front about how he tried to save her, and that “it’s really hard to see her go”.

So it all comes down to the final HOH competition, and the first part is called “A Wing and a Prayer”. They’re all strapped atop a miniature airplane this is raised a few feet off the ground, and as you may expect the last person standing is the winner. We end the show with a final shot of them, with “turbulence” now added.


Big Brother Season 10, Episode 24 Recap

When we last saw the cast, they were surprised (and frightened) by a nearly naked sumo wrestler sitting in their living room. Tonight we find out why this creature was in the house, along with the typical scheming, HOH schmaltz-fest, and what shapes up to be the most anticlimactic nomination ceremony ever.

So we start with the reaction to Renny’s eviction. A tearful Keesha says she “adores” her and that it was “really hard to watch her walk out the door”. Guess what, she says it “sucks”. Jerry, though, after thanking Renny for her cooking, says that his reign as HOH was “successful” because it kept him around another week. “It was a failure, (though), because I didn’t send Dan home.”

The Renegades are obviously happy. Memphis says his plan was to get rid of Renny, “and it happened. At this point, with Renny gone, any of us can win.” Dan adds that because everybody in the jury house loves Renny, it was important to send her packing. “People would love to give her the money.”

We see one final embrace between Renny and Keesha before we head to the aftermath. Watching the wall of pictures, Keesha says “her picture should have never turned black and white because Renny is a star; the person who lights up the room when she walks in.”

Moving on to the HOH competition, Dan pats himself on the back for his “huge win. This key right here ensures that I have a one in three chance at $500,000.” Memphis is also happy, but pretends that being put on the block last time by him was not pre-planned. “If he puts me on the block again, I’m going to hurt him.” Here’s a hint, Memphis. Don’t suggest it then!

Keesha is not happy with herself, especially since she’s FINALLY figured out that Dan is closer to Memphis than her. Jerry states the obvious about how there is only one more HOH left in the game, and then babbles about how the “house is against me every day, and I do have to find a way to break this house apart.” I love how he gets such a sympathetic edit.

Now we end the recap portion with the introduction of the sumo wrestler. They’re all a bit hesitant to approach him, and Dan suggests that since Jerry is “the toughest one here”, he should take him on. “No way, Jose”, he responds.

Keesha becomes even more scared when the wrestler tells the house in a foreign language that he’s sitting on the info they need. “Does anyone know how to translate”, asks Dan. This time it’s Keesha’s turn to state the obvious. “The sumo wrestler was huge. Huge! Huge!” Yeah, we get it, sweetie.

Memphis says that maybe they have to wrestle him for the money. Now that I’d pay to watch. As Memphis talks about how they didn’t know what to do, the sumo guy suddenly stands up…which causes all four of them to jump back a step. Underneath his huge, stanky ass is an envelope, which he sits back down on. Dan asks why he’s there, and again we get the foreign babbling, along with an overdubbed gong noise. “I guess we know where the earthquake came from”, Dan attempts to joke.
Jerry just sits down to watch, but Dan finally notices the envelope. He moves closer to the wrestler, and snatches it the next time he stands up. He reads the note inside, which tells them that they will be having a luxury competition that involves a trip out of the house for the winner that “could impact the game”.
They all have awful guesses for what this means. Memphis thinks it’s a sushi dinner; Jerry guesses something about a “tea house”; Keesha goes on about a show. Dan somehow believes they can ship the winner to Japan. Somehow Jerry also guesses that it’s a trip to Vegas, but Keesha really sums it all up by saying “I really am lost”. Yeah, you are.
The wrestler finally leaves, and Jerry immediately jumps on the “could impact the game” line. Dan and Memphis run off to celebrate Dan’s victory, and the possibility of this luxury prize.
Keesha is more melancholy, though, and Dan attempts to cheer her up. She says “it gets pretty hard when people start to mean something to you”, and warns him that Jerry is “going to try to get between us”. She wonders if the three of them will make it to the end. “I hope so, as long as Jerry doesn’t win the POV”, Dan answers. She really “hopes” they would pick her over Jerry, she says in the diary room, but doubt is starting to creep in. Damn, she’s looking fantastic, though.
Moving on to later that night (or some night), we see Keesha sitting outside with tears running down her face. “It’s just really hard being in here without Renny. We just knew that we had each other’s backs. These guys both have each other’s backs, as far as I’m concerned. For the first time, I’m going to be alone, but I’m going to give them a run for their money.”
Poor Memphis is now stuck outside with Jerry, who talks about how “two people are going to win it”. You think, Jerry? Ugh. He whines about how it’s so rough for him because he couldn’t compete in the HOH, and about how he has “a couple of kids who really need some help”. Get the violins out now, BB producers! Jerry admits that he’s “grasping at straws”, and we hear that he knows the jury house is going to vote “for a woman” if they make it to the finals. Whatever, old man, but Memphis is now starting to question who is the best person to take with them.
Time for some time-wasting segments – the boys have a pet spider named Ted, and they like to catch bugs for him to consume It’s bad enough we have to endure this on Showtime, but we don’t need it replay it here. Keesha is horrified, as are most of the viewers. Being a biology teacher, though, Dan thinks it’s “the coolest thing ever!”
Speaking of boring segments, we now see Dan run out to announce the opening of his HOH room…to crickets. Well, to be fair, they’re just not in earshot of his announcement, and when he finds them they do all run upstairs. Damn, his girlfriend looks hot, and Memphis laughs at the earlier conspiracy theories that Ollie and April had. Jerry goes on about how Dan used to be fat, which Dan says is not a good idea to get on his good side. Dan reads a letter from his dad, who has nice things to say about everybody…”even Jerry”.
For some reason, we now get a shot of everybody sleeping intermixed with shots of a bunch of statues in the backyard, along with a contortionist and a gorilla. This silly creature runs into the diary room to reveal that he’s actually Jessie. “Who else can fill out this suit?” Oh boy. He still can’t read very well, as he struggles to narrate how he’s there to give them a “rude awakening”.
After commercials, Jessie runs out and wakes everybody up. Trust me, it’s not quite like when Evel Dick wakes up the house. Keesha claims it’s “surreal”. Is it? Is it really? Dan the Brainiac figures out that because yesterday they had the sumo wrestler the gorilla must also have something to do with the luxury competition. “(It’s) not everyday you’re awakened by a gorilla.”
They run outside to see the statues, and Dan first notices the contortionist. “There’s another female in the house, and I’ve been staring at the same ones for the past 60 days.” Keesha describes all of the statues, but doesn’t add a lot to the setup.
Everything is there to possibly be a part of a puzzle, and the person who figures it out gets the trip. Jerry wants to win it because he’s still stuck on that phrase about impacting the game. “I can use any advantage I can get.”
The game begins, and all four just kind of circle around the objects, and we again hear from Dan how this game works. Jessie the Gorilla mainly follows Dan around, and imitates his every move. Memphis finds him funny, though.
Jerry pulls the bell first, and makes a “hear no evil/see no evil” guess. They all get three guesses, though, so we don’t know if he’s right. Jessie the Gorilla covers up an object, and Keesha explains that as the time goes on the gorilla is covering up objects that don’t feature in the correct answer. Memphis scares her by barking when she approaches the wolf statue. She then rings the bell and guesses “where sleeping dogs lie”.
The gorilla covers up the emu, which makes Jerry realize that his guess was wrong. Dan and Memphis continue to wander around the backyard. Jerry again rings the bell, and guesses “diamonds are a girl’s bestfriend”. Come on, Jerry.
The gorilla covers up more objects, and the house guests all laugh at him. Keesha rings the bell again, and answers “blew it” because of nonsensical reasons. Suddenly, the contortionist gets up and leaves, and Dan is heartbroken.
The time is clicking down, and Jerry doesn’t want to waste his last guess. Dan hasn’t’ answered yet, because of some dumb football rule about “don’t go until you know”. Hmmm, I haven’t heard that one before. Jerry goes ahead and does ring it, and after pissing everybody off by making a cocky wave now guesses “a dog is a man’s best friend”. Jerry! It’s not a contest of clichés! It has to do with the game. He realizes pretty quickly that he was wrong with all three.
Memphis has two guesses left, but has no clue. Keesha rings in with another selection, and she babbles “don’t count your chickens until your eggs are hatched”. Oh, girl! Memphis admits that he’s awful at these types of games, and Jessie calls him a baby. Dan finally rings in with a guess, and he goes with “bury the hatchet”. Memphis rings in next, but tells Dan that he’s just going to say something. He guesses “fruitless exit”, and he knows it’s wrong.
With time winding down, the gorilla shakes Jerry’s hand and makes “the noise” that he supposedly made all the time. Jessie brags in the diary room about how “they didn’t see that coming until right at the end”. Ugh, you’re really not that clever.
With the contest over, they now see a gorilla hand hanging below Jessie’s picture, and Keesha says it “explains why he didn’t want anything to do with me”. Good one, girlfriend. Jerry agrees that it was him. They all sit down to wait for the results.
Dan says he’s very confident that he had the right phrase, but he’s concerned that Jerry or Keesha had it before him. The living room screen comes on, and the winner of this boring, drawn-out contest is…commercial time.

When we come back, it is indeed Dan who won. He’s a bit full of himself as he talks about how he’s “on a roll”. He’s called to the diary room, where he opens an envelope that tells him that he gets a private helicopter trip to a remote beach. The catch is that he can take either one of his current housemates or a jury member of his choice! He says that he’s leaning towards taking a jury member, because choosing anybody left in the house could create problems. He thinks that choosing Michelle might help him get a vote, since she was supposedly screwed out of the Hawaiian trip, along with her eviction last week. After some cut shots of him, he does indeed choose Michelle.
He comes out of the diary room, and tells everybody about the prize. He knows he can’t tell them that he’s taking a jury member, so he tells them that he’s going alone because he “didn’t want to create any animosity in the house”. Keesha says it was a smart move, but Jerry points out that maybe he’s going to visit the jury. He again brings up the “change the game” line, and Dan pretends to be concerned. In the diary room, Jerry adds that “it’s not Dan” to not bring Memphis with him. Dan is now worried that this could backfire on him.
We finally get back to game talk, and Dan and Memphis are talking about who should go on the block. Dan babbles the obvious, about how the winner of the veto is the person who decides the next eviction. Although Memphis just said that he doesn’t want to be on the block again, he basically volunteers to go up so that Keesha “won’t worry”. Dan agrees that this may be a good idea, although it’s a risk.
So it’s finally nomination time, and you know the drill. Dan reads the script that everybody has to read, and all three of the other house guests babble about whether they’re going up or not. Dan finally announces that he’s ready, and after a dumb speech about loving everybody the only key pulled is Keesha’s. Dan talks about how the upcoming POV is “one battle for the ages”. What about your usual silly showmanship for TV?
Reacting to the nomination, Memphis talks about how being put up is just a show to “hide the Renegade alliance”. Jerry says he was shocked because he thought there was a “definite loyalty situation there. He turned on Memphis again, and Memphis was upset. Now I can use that to my advantage to go to the end.” Um, ok. Keesha says she’s “very excited” because it could mean that Dan wants her over Memphis. You silly twit.
Dan ends the show by bragging about his great week. Yes, we know. You’re so good. See you Tuesday for the veto competition, and Dan’s “exciting” trip with Michelle!


Big Brother Season 10, Episode 23 Recap

New Orleans may have been spared by Hurricane Gustav, but unless there’s some strange unknown twist in plans tonight we will see the exit of the self-proclaimed Queen of the old city. Our girl Renny has been the source of frustration to a few, but to many of us late-night viewers she was really the only reason to watch. I expect a thunderous reaction by the studio audience, and more than a few tears to be shed by those in and out of the house.
Other then the moment that Renny leaves the house, this shapes up to be an unremarkable episode. It really doesn’t matter who wins the HOH, since Jerry can’t play. I guess it would be more of a story if Keesha is the victor, but it’s doubtful that she’ll do anything different than Dan or Memphis. Otherwise, the only somewhat interesting package will be our first glimpse into the jury house…although last year’s footage was pretty underwhelming.
So here we go with (as you probably expect) the reactions to Memphis taking Dan off the block in the veto ceremony. Renny steals Keesha’s favorite word and says the veto meeting “sucked today. Memphis can kiss my ass. He wanted to split up Keesha and I. I’m on the block with a friend. I’m not going to campaign against Keesha.”
Keesha is in tears as she complains that the “one she cares most about is sitting beside me on the block. Either way, it’s a lose/lose situation. I do not want to lose Renny, but I don’t want to leave.”
Explaining his move, Memphis says he can’t “trust anyone more than I do Dan. The Renegade alliance is still alive, and Dan and I have a deal to the end.” We see Jerry scowl at the two as he walks up to the HOH, and he complains in the diary room that “Memphis screwed me over at the POV meeting. He told me that he would work with me to get Dan out of the house, and he broke his word. Betrayal in this game should just not go unpunished.” Again, we hear about how he’s alone in the house, as he lays down to sulk.
Dan whispers to himself, “the kid survives one more week”, and in the diary room acts all cocky about how “Memphis came through with flying colors, and put the necklace around my neck for my birthday.” They shake hands in the bathroom, as we hear him go on about how “The Renegades control the votes”.
Memphis does tell him that it “a lot harder than I thought it would be”, as he had to screw over people he cares about. He adds that he knows that Jerry is going to “flip out”. Cue the scene where Jerry glares at him, and after Memphis walks away he asks a depressed Keesha to come talk to him.
She heads upstairs, and Jerry tells her that Memphis’ move “indicated where loyalties lie. It’s obvious he wanted to keep Dan to the end, so it’s obvious they’re playing to the end.” Keesha agrees, and Jerry now claims that he’s her “shot at a half million…I could be a tremendous advantage to you. I think you’re going to find that Memphis has an agreement with everybody.” In the diary room, Keesha says that Jerry’s words have raised some questions.
She now joins Renny, and asks if she thinks Dan and Memphis plan to “carry each other to the end”. Renny says yes, mainly because Memphis could have taken her down instead of Dan. “He’s very shrewd. So is Dan.”
In the kitchen, Jerry attempts to put ideas into Dan’s head by asking him why Memphis decided to keep him. “He thinks he can beat you if he goes to the final with you.” Dan pretty much ignores him, even as Jerry claims to be the person who can help him win. “I want some support that you’re going to take me to the final three.” He adds that the only person in the house who hadn’t betrayed him is Memphis, which is why he wasn’t put on the block. Of course, he then betrayed him. “You’re no different than them.” Dan continues to pretend to pay attention.
Splitting a beer in the storage room, Dan and Keesha trade notes on their conversations with Jerry. They both laugh at how he said he needs someone to take him to the final three. Their conversation is interrupted by Memphis, and he’s filled in on the conversations. Memphis denies having deals with everybody, and says “as long as he doesn’t win POV”, he’s out.
After they walk out, Dan warns Memphis that “we’ve got to be careful with her”. They’re now starting to worry that Jerry’s words may be working on her.
Keesha, meanwhile, is sitting with Renny, who says “when I leave here, I’ll be a different woman.” Keesha says likewise, and Renny adds that “things in my life will change”. Keesha says that her time in the house has “made me respect different things in my life”. Renny’s words of advice is that she wants Keesha to “be a mother”. They both get teary-eyed as they talk about how they brought each other along. “I’ll never forget you”, says Renny.
After commercials, we get a puff piece on Memphis. “Is there more to this Hollywood player than meets the eye?” Ugh. After hearing him talk about how much he misses his girlfriend, we get to meet the lovely woman and her friends watch him win the veto. She says that when they met, he “wasn’t the perfect boyfriend material”. This goes on for awhile, as we hear how he’s “changed” and “become stronger”. Seriously, this is the worst profile of the season. Oh, and Memphis’ buddy is a tool.
With that segment over, we get to chat with the contestants. Jerry is asked about his fall into the pool, and they all get to laugh at the footage. Keesha looks horrified. He calls it a “senior moment”. Dan is then given birthday wishes from Julie, and says that now “I have to act like a mature adult now”. He’s asked if he enjoys teasing Renny. Duh. “At home I tease my mom a lot, and Renny is my mom away from mom here. I have so much fun with Renny that to not tease her would be an insult. The more I tease her, the more I care about her.” Renny claims to enjoy his antics, and that “(she’s) a mother sometimes, (but) sometimes I don’t know what I am. Sometimes he ends up in the bed back there!”
Now for more wasted time, as Julie interviews Jerry in the HOH. She asks why he made a deal with Memphis. “I was running out of bodies, Julie. There’s just nobody else around. I tried to make a deal with all three of those remaining.” After a bad Velcro joke, Julie moves on to ask who he wants to see next to him at the finals. Keesha is his answer, and it’s because of some dumb answer about how “those two are like glue. The only way through it is to get there with someone else.” Ugh.
Ooooh, we now get the jury house footage. Libra starts off by babbling how she should be the winner. Um, you’re not, and it’s your own fault. She hopes that the next body in the door is April, and she laughs when it is her. April babbles that she’s “in a state of shock”, and that having a vote is “almost more pressure than being in the game”. Um, no.
Now we see the two wait for the next person to enter, and Libra thinks it’s going to be Michelle, while April hopes for Keesha (and whines about how she hopes there’s no extra beds so she has to sleep outside. Ugh to that fake smile after she’s done). Well, we know who it is, and she waltzes in with “guess who got backdoored?” Libra claims to be a psychic. No, you’re not. April is in shock when she hears that Ollie made a deal and “I got backdoored”. We get it, Michelle. “Ollie got taken for a ride.” She throws in the DVD of the footage, and exclaims, “my god, I do look good on camera”. No, you don’t. Just stop it. April makes a catty remark about how Keesha “isn’t losing any weight”. Jesus, she’s even worse out of the house. Michelle says “she gained like 15 pounds in her ass”, and I wish I could make a capture of that face that April just made. Her and Michelle both celebrate when Keesha falls down.
April gets a bit teary-eyed when she sees Ollie struggling to stay warm. Michelle fills them on Ollie’s deal, and they now watch the “Replacement nominee roulette”. Even Libra is shocked! “Father Dan!” Michelle wants a voodoo doll of him.
Now the final juror pulls up, and Michelle really wants it to be Dan. “I seriously want to do physical harm to him.” Yeah, we know. April squeals something about being happy to see him, and then we get sappy footage of the two of them. She says yes to being his girlfriend. Ugh.
Finally, we get back to the game. A boobalicious Renny goes first with her final speech. She says she never thought she’d make it this far, and that she’s a fighter and a “survivor of unimaginable grief that you don’t know”. Hmmm, I wonder what that is. She pays tribute to Keesha, but that she has to fight for herself.
An equally boobalicious Keesha tells Renny how much she loves her, and how amazing she is. She congratulates the others, and says she wants to wish them the best of luck.
The voting begins, and you know how this goes. Both Memphis and Dan vote to evict Renny, and she’s all smiles as she hugs everybody and walks out of the house.
Back inside, Keesha says that “was the hardest person watching go” as they all watch her picture go to black and white. Julie begins by asking her why she was booted instead of Keesha, and Renny is honest in saying she was weak at competitions.
Wow, one question and we go to the goodbye message? Interesting. Dan gives her props for being the caretaker of the house, whether she likes people or not…”including Jerry”. All Jerry can talk about is how she “did wonders with the food”, which causes quite a look from her. Memphis apologizes, and claims to “cherish every moment we had in the house”.
Keesha’s speech is left for last, and you can guess how tearful she is. “I didn’t expect fo find somebody like you.” Renny’s final thoughts are a repeat of the “incredible journey” line, and that she hopes she made her family proud.
We return to the house, and Julie talks about the pictures they saw earlier today. Video clips are then shown that include those shots, and they’re instructed to head outside. The contest involves true/false questions about the pictures.
The first question is about the astronaut game, and whether everybody in the picture was carrying a helmet. Keesha gets it wrong. The second question is about whether Mike Boogie is the only one not clapping his hands, and Dan is the only one who answers correctly.
For question three, the “buggin’ out” picture is the basis of the question, and if there are six people standing outside of the cars. All three answer false, and are correct. Question four is from “livin’ on the edge”, and whether there are five hash marks on the road. Dan and Memphis are correct. Poor Keesha.
Question six is from “Big Brother honey”, and if there is one person standing. Keesha is again the only person who is incorrect. Next up is from “Ladies Yelling”, and if there all of them are wearing earrings. Again, Keesha is the only one wrong, and the final question is from “Big Brother Slapshot”, and if the red light is off. They’re all correct, which means that Dan is HOH!!!

Uh oh, there’s a surprise for them as they come into the house after the commercial – a giant sumo wrestler. Dan claims that they were “just talking about sumo wrestlers”, and asks Jerry if he wants to take him on. AS we leave, the sumo guy speaks in his native tongue that “I am sitting on the information that you need.” Keesha is scared to death, and even Dan is a bit freaked out.


Big Brother Season 10, Episode 22 Recap

Here we go with another Tuesday night edition of Big Brother. I’m not much entertainment tonight, other than the veto competition and ceremony. Otherwise, we’ll have lots of self-congratulation from Jerry and much, much filler.
Guess where we begin tonight? Yes, the reaction to the nominations of Keesha and Dan. Five bucks that Keesha says it “sucks”. Dan speaks first, and while he’s “not thrilled” to be nominated, he’s “excited that Memphis and myself are not on the block together”. He adds that the key is for one of them to win the upcoming POV so that he can come off the block.
After a handshake from Dan, we hear Jerry say that he wants Dan “out of the house. Keesha is nothing more than a pawn. As long as Memphis keeps his deal, Dan will be going home.” Don’t be so sure of that, old man.
Jerry reassures Keesha that she “should be ok”. Keesha’s not so sure. “I would be stupid not to feel worried.” Wait, nothing about how “being on the block sucks”? Ugh.
Wow, we’re getting a lot of reaction to the nominations tonight. I guess they really do have lots of time to fill. Memphis says “everything is falling into place. I have separate deals with Keesha, Jerry, and Dan. The only one I don’t have a final two deal with is Renny. If I can find a way to get rid of Renny this week I’d be sitting pretty.”
Dan goes into one of the bedrooms, and mutters about seeing what the “Magic Man” has in store for them this week. Keesha joins him, and they both talk about the POV. “This sucks, dude!” Ah, there’s Keesha with the expected line. Dan explains that they can both stay, and that bright blonde figures out that would mean either Renny or Memphis would have to go.
Dan asks if either have a deal with Keesha, and she says she doesn’t know but that fear will cause them to go after the veto just as hard as them. Dan feels that if he wins, then Memphis would go up, and Renny would replace Keesha if she won. “The only for sure thing is getting it yourself”, says Keesha.
We now follow Dan upstairs, as he goes to tell Jerry there’s no hard feelings about the nomination. “I hope you don’t feel any hostility.” Jerry says he had no choice but to look at the past situations where people had supposedly “ganged up on him”. Always the martyr, Jerry. “I’m one against four. I would be very naïve to think that all of a sudden you all really loved me for me.” Oh boy, he’s relishing this moment, and babbles in the diary room about how he’s hiding his agreement with Memphis.
Downstairs, Renny is now talking with Jerry, which we all know is a treat for her. They babble about the importance of the veto competition. He just has to let her know that if the boys win the POV they could ultimately decide to send her home. Good job, Jerry.
Renny walks away to cheer up Keesha, but tells her that the boys would always choose her between the two of them. “But you’re not up there”, Keesha replies. Renny repeats what Jerry told her about if Memphis took down Dan. “That’s the only way that would happen.” Keesha’s upset in the diary room, because “you’re not the one on the block”. Renny says in the diary room that “it’s not looking to good (for her) right now”.
After commercials, we get silly stuff. The boys are all outside, and Dan sees a banner. Jerry continues to walk backwards to get a better glimpse, and falls into the pool! Dan says in the diary room that it’s his funniest moment in the house. “The pool’s been there for 60 days. Jerry, it hasn’t gone anywhere!” (A bit of disclosure – this incident occurred well after the time line we’re currently at.)
Recovered from his fall, Jerry now speaks to Memphis about the upcoming veto competition. “You gotta understand that I’m going to do what benefits me”, says Memphis, “but you gotta understand that I made my word with you. And I don’t break my word.” He tells him that no matter what, Jerry is coming with him. “I will not sacrifice you for nothing”, claims Jerry.
We now see Memphis basically saying the same thing to Keesha. He tells her that he’ll be happy “walking away with 50 g’s…I think either me or you needs to win HOH”. Keesha agrees with everything.
To complete the trifecta, it’s now Dan’s turn to hear the same promise as they babble their Renegades garbage. They make plans to pull out red bandanas when the final HOH makes his decision for his running mate. Despite the multiple promises, Memphis says “only time will tell who I take to the final two”.
Time for more silliness – Dan loves to aggravate Renny. So we now see Dan imitating Renny’s actions and looks. “Dan has a few quirks which I don’t understand. I mean, he has a few behaviors that are questionable. He aggravates me sometimes.” This goes on until Renny pretends to choke him.
Now they’re all lying in the bedroom, and Renny tells Dan to tell her something funny. “Hold up a mirror”, he jokes. “Why are you being so mean to me?” The two go back and forth, and this time Renny is not having so much fun. Dan says that his plan is “to drive Renny insane” to make it easier to win the veto. Renny finally has enough, and walks away…but not before giving him a spank. They all sense that it’s not so funny anymore.
“Dan’s being a jackass, and he’s turning up the volume a notch to be very immature. It’s not funny anymore. I’d really like to see Dan go home.” Keesha leaves the room, and Memphis asks him if this is a smart move to antagonize her. “If she makes the final two, she’s going to win”, responds Dan. “We just have to make sure Renny’s on the block”, Memphis adds.
It’s now veto competition time. Each person has to go to a different room, and come out into the backyard to compete. Dan says that he’d be happy to win the veto, but “if Memphis won the veto I’d be doing a dance up and down the street because that’s the only 100% way to save the renegades.
Dan is the first to go outside, and the contest involves figuring out whose pictures were combined to make a morphed baby picture. Dan says it’s not an easy game, and we finally see him get his first correct answer. “Individually, the house guests are all pretty good looking, but when you put them together they’re all ugly.” He does have a good time with the combo of Jerry’s “bald head” and Michelle’s “evil eyes”. Finally, he finishes, but he’s not happy with his performance.
Jerry is up next, and we again hear about his goal to evict Dan. But he also struggles with the first pair, but goes on a roll with the next couple of pictures. “There’s nobody in this house that should have babies together”, he comments. Tell that to April and Ollie.
Memphis is the third competitor, and again we hear about how the best case scenario is for him to win. And we also get to hear how ugly these babies are. He seems to cruise through the game, but struggles with the second to last one. “Overall, I think I did good, but I could have done better.”
Renny babbles about how important it is for HER to win, and Memphis winning would be a disaster. She does like her combo with Jessie, though. She’s the only one who doesn’t immediately figure out the bald baby is Jerry, and tries every name but Jerry. She hesitates, and finally gets it correct. “I was upset with myself.”
Finally, we get Keesha’s performance, and we get more babbling about how important this is to win. “I’m not going out without a fight.” Yet she also struggles, and complains that the one that includes her looks like a gorilla. Overall, she appears to do pretty well, though.
With the contest complete, we now see the scores. Jerry thinks he did pretty well, and we go through everybody once again talking about how important it is. PRODUCERS, WE GET IT! But first we have commercials.
When we return, we find out Renny’s time was 23:32. She says she is “disappointed in herself”, but “I never give up”. Jerry’s time was 8:01, while Dan’s was 2:58. Wow! Memphis is revealed next, and his score was 2:50. Keesha thinks she has a chance, although she’s impressed by Memphis’ score. Her time ends up being 5:16, which means that Memphis won the POV!
Memphis claims that now that he’s won, he’s “thinking of a lot of different scenarios”. Yeah, right. “You have to think ahead. You have to think of that next step.” Jerry hopes that he “sticks to his word, and keeps Dan and Keesha on the block”. Dan adds that Renny and Keesha are now completely paranoid. “Jerry has literally no control the rest of the week.”
Keesha is completely upset with herself, because, as we know, this veto was so important. “I feel horrible because I believe it was the only chance to save myself and Renny.”
The Renegades are sitting outside, and Memphis warns him that if he saves him he has to “stop these antics…don’t pull no crazy shit next week”. Dan reassures him that he wants to take him with him to the final two, but Memphis claims to not be so sure. “In the back of your mind, you question things.” Dan points out that they’ve been working together for 3 or 4 weeks now, and Memphis says that next week if it is him and Keesha on the block he HAS to vote for him to stay. Memphis doesn’t even want to be put up if Dan wins HOH.
Memphis adds that if he does pull Dan down, his other two deals must carry on. Good luck with, Drinkboy, especially when we hear Keesha tell Renny that he’s going to “throw us under the bus as much as possible”. Renny questions why it would be a bad thing for Memphis to boot Dan, but Keesha doesn’t think that’s possible unless “Dan really screws himself over by saying some hardcore stuff”. Look at Renny’s brain working in overdrive.
Keesha promises to talk to Memphis, but Renny says that “maybe he won’t say anything because of me”. Keesha doesn’t think it matters to him which of them go, but Renny doesn’t think he’d ever boot Keesha.
So Keesha questions a shirtless Memphis (which must be making some ladies very happy). “What are you going to do, Memphis? I’m not going to beat around the bush about it. I know you have a good idea.” Memphis just says that she will be with him next week, but the only way to do that “is to secure that Dan goes with us”. Keesha says she knew he was going to do that, and is immediately worried that Dan will go against her. “I hate trusting Dan.” Memphis points out that he’s not going to screw over either of them because then he won’t have any allies.
Renny now walks in on Memphis in the kitchen, and babbles something about hearing people talk about her. “Nobody’s talking about you,” he replies. “I don’t play that game.” She hugs Memphis, who swears that he would tell her if anybody is talking about her. She says she just wants a chance. “I fought for you, Memphis, to stay here. I didn’t put you on the block.” (Now those are interesting statements. How about pulling out some old footage, BB?)
Now Memphis is questioned by Jerry, and he tells him that no matter what he’s still taking the old codger to the very end. Jerry again talks about not trusting Dan, but Memphis says that he has another issue in the house (Renny). Jerry says that next week is the time to take care of that issue, and won’t let Memphis have a word in the discussion. “I can see Dan winning. In the last couple of days, he would have promised me anything.” Memphis admits in the diary room that he’s worried about pissing off both Keesha and Jerry.
It’s finally that time, and we hear Memphis again talking about how important veto ceremony is because of all of his deals. Dan babbles about seeing the “Renegade flag waving high”, and that this will be his “biggest escape yet”. Renny talks about how Memphis should be thinking about the grand prize, and that “plucking” Dan would be his best move. Jerry again talks about their “understanding”, and he doesn’t think that he’ll pull Dan off the block. “If he doesn’t honor this, then I don’t have an alliance with him.”
Memphis finally calls them into the house, and Dan goes first with his speech. “For once, I don’t have a lot to say.” It’s his birthday, though, and the veto would be a great birthday present. Keesha babbles about how the four of them have “had each other’s back pretty much the whole game”, and then Memphis announces that he is going to take Dan down. I’ve been thinking about it a lot, and looking at what’s best for me in this game.”
Jerry’s pissed, as is Renny, especially when Jerry now has to put her up to replace Dan. Renny reacts by saying that the dream of Keesha and her was to end up being the final two players, but “I still have fight in me. I’ll go out swinging, that’s for sure.” Jerry babbles some more about how Memphis has screwed him by saving Dan. “I will certainly do something in retribution.” Memphis somehow still thinks that Jerry trusts him. “I think I set myself up pretty good.”
Dan goes on about being in Jerry’s “cross hairs”, but again somehow found a way to “escape before he pulled the trigger”. And that’s it until Thursday’s eviction.


Big Brother Season 10, Episode 21 Recap

Well, here we go with a special holiday edition of Big Brother. What’s special about it? We’re going into this without knowing the new HOH (unless, of course, you’ve been watching the live feeds).
So we’re (hopefully) looking at an action-packed episode tonight. We’ll have the HOH competition, some campaigning, and the nominations. Oh, and lots and lots of reactions to everything that happened last Thursday. Oops, it’s not so action-packed after all. Look for lots of recaps and reactions, I guess.
Obviously, that’s where we begin, starting with the news that the show was a double-elimination. Dan says that his only hope on hearing the news was that his alliance would come out unscathed. Yeah, we know, Dan, you’re above using such an obvious cliché.
We now see once again Michelle’s eviction. What a great moment. Jerry also states the obvious (as usual) when he says that Michelle’s departure meant that any alliance he may have had is dwindling. Keesha “can honestly say” (how many times have we heard those three words this year?) that she felt bad for Michelle, but “I was one of her biggest targets”. Renny says she wanted to give her a vote, but she’s loyal to her alliance. Ollie claims he’s going to avenge her eviction.
After she walks out, we hear Memphis say “thank God” she’s gone, as Ollie sprints away from the crowd. “The things that came out of her mouth were ridiculous. She’s a complainer; a pain in the ass. She thinks she deserves this money more than anybody in this house.” Keesha babbles about how there’s no time to think about her eviction.
It’s time to move on to the first HOH competition, and Memphis laughs when the tie-breaker between Jerry and Keesha involves numbers. “She’s not going to be able to this math. We’re screwed.” Yet Keesha does win, and she’s excited. “I just needed it so bad, for me and my teammates.”
Dan’s also happy, obviously, especially since he thinks he knows who she is going to nominate. Keesha does exactly as expected, nominating Jerry and Ollie. Before replaying the veto competition, we again hear Jerry talk about how “you never feel safe” when you’re on the block. Is this old footage again? He says he just kept telling himself to “play your hardest” and “keep your composure”. Ollie repeats the usual “my back’s against the wall” b.s.
As you probably know, Dan won the veto competition, and he goes on about how “nobody’s dumb enough to think I’m a week player at this point”. He accepts congratulations from Jerry, and rounds up Memphis and Keesha to find out who they want to see go home. Keesha says “Ollie”, and Memphis says it’s the “best scenario” that could happen. Dan informs Renny of the decision, and he runs into the bathroom to celebrate with Memphis. “We’re taking them out one by one.” Meanwhile, Ollie is in the bedroom, clearly upset.
After Dan announces that he’s not going to use the veto, Ollie whispers to Jerry that “we don’t have a week to campaign”. Jerry laughs and says “life is short”. Ollie is then sent packing, and sprints out the door. Dan says in the diary room that “I couldn’t have written a better script for myself. Michelle left, and Ollie leaves about an hour later…the only person we have left to get out is Jerry.” Jerry whines that he wants everybody to talk to him over the next week, and everybody but Renny leaves the room. Renny is tired of him within seconds, as Jerry goes on and on in his analysis of what just happened. “We have nothing in common,” she says in the diary room. She finally gets away from him, and Memphis promises to try to keep him away from her. They all celebrate as we see the lonely old codger unpack his suitcase.
They’re all getting a bit too cocky, though, which is clear when we hear Memphis say it’s now a “cakewalk to the final four”. In fact, they all laugh when Renny says “he may win the game…you can’t get rid of him”. Trust me, there’s some foreshadowing here.
I guess there’s still time for useless segments, as we now see Renny confused over time differences between California and her home town of New Orleans. She seems to think that when it’s 8:00 in L.A., then it’s 6:00 at home, and gets angry when Dan laughs. Oh boy, this goes on wayyyyyyyyyy too long. Finally, she gets it right, and they all have a good laugh.
For more idiocy, we have a segment where they all make fun of Keesha’s laugh. “It’s definitely one of a kind”, says Memphis. Dan adds that the only time he’s heard laugh like that is when he was “walking by the hyenas at the zoo”. Please, spare us! I must laugh, though, when she wakes up Jerry with that awful racket, and his imitation is horrendous.
Finally, we get the HOH competition. It’s a carnival setting, which Renny says brought back memories of a child. Really, it’s just an oversize recreation of skeet ball. Memphis, Dan, and Jerry all say they need to win it.
First we have commercials, and then we finally get to see the competition. Instead of the usual skeet ball game, the score they get has to correspond to a question regarding the specific day something happened in the house. Renny says she’s only played the game once or twice, and her first roll is godawful. Memphis says he doesn’t remember any days, so he broke it down into weeks and went from there. Dan is confident he can get the first one correct, as it had to do with Jerry’s “Judas” comment.
Dan takes the lead on the first question, and the second question is when the “aliens” appeared in the windows. Jerry says his roll was “off”, and Dan is still in the lead in the second round.
The third question is the day that Brian was “blind-sided”, and Dan is still in the lead. For the fourth question, it’s the day Brian came back to host the veto competition. Jerry almost hits this question perfectly, but Jerry is catching up. Dan’s upset that Dan is doing so poorly.
Next up is the day of the earthquake, and Jerry hits the exact number. Dan’s still winning, but is only two points ahead of Jerry, who is beginning to gain confidence. The next question is the day Jessie was evicted, and Dan’s roll bounced ten away from where he aimed.
We’re now on the final question, and Jerry is in the lead by six “penalty” points. Memphis is bummed. This question is what day the house was given lollipops, and Dan says he needs a big play. He rolls exactly what he wanted, and it is the perfect score, but Jerry is only four off. Jerry wins! Yet again we get to hear about how he’s a survivor, while the others are clearly disappointed. “My heart sank into my stomach”, Dan says in the diary room, “and I know it’s going to be a rough week. I put Jerry up; I’ve double-crossed him twice. I have a pretty good feeling I’m going up on the block.” Keesha just adds that it sucks.
Sitting in the kitchen, Jerry says he has no idea where he’s going with this, so “just talk to me”. Yep, Jerry’s using this win to gain companionship. Keesha doesn’t buy it, and tells Memphis that “you always have in mind who you want to put up”. Dan joins them, and says he thinks it will be “me and Renny”. Memphis points out that all of them have fought with him, but he’s not going to make a deal with him. “He’s a loose cannon.”
Now it’s time for my (least) favorite portion of the Sunday show – the entrance to the HOH room. They all act excited, but Memphis sets it straight that they “all have to pucker up” with Jerry as HOH. Even Jerry knows it’s all an act as he shows off his pictures and knick-knacks. Everybody falls asleep as he tells a lengthy story about a stuffed animal named “Hissy” that’s in his box of treats. Dan says it best – “at the end of a long day the last thing you want to hear is a story from 1935”. Yet he knows that “staying awake may be the difference between me winning $500,000 and being sent home this week”.
With storytime over, Keesha heads back downstairs and starts strategizing with Memphis, who admits in the diary room that he’s “covering his bases” as he tries to win over all three of them. He informs her that he has no plans to ever see any of those other people again, and that’s why “I need you here”. I think he learned more than just how to make drinks in his previous career as a “mixologist”.
There’s lots of extra time to fill tonight, so now we get some footage of Renny sleepwalking. “Renny is completely off the reservation”, observes Memphis. Keesha adds that Renny is “completely hilarious, no matter what time of day it is. Even in her sleep.” She babbles more nonsense, much to the amusement of Keesha and Memphis. The next morning, Renny doesn’t remember any of it, and doesn’t believe Keesha whwen she explains how the candy got in her bed.
Back to gameplay – Renny is lying down and Keesha comes in clearly upset. Renny first asks what’s wrong, but immediately goes on to ask what she thinks “The Colonel” is going to do. Keesha thinks it’s the two of them, but Renny thinks the two boys would be his best bet. Keesha says she’s “really going to need you this week; probably more than ever”. Renny is convinced that Memphis WON’T be going on the block.
Meanwhile, Dan and Memphis are having a similar conversation in the backyard, and Dan advises him to say yes to anything Jerry offers. Memphis says that he’s going to point out that Dan put him on the block. They continue to debate whether it’s worth making a deal. Memphis says that no matter what, they both can’t be on the block.
Memphis heads upstairs to talk to Jerry, who says he’s been lying awake for hours and hours trying to figure out what he’s going to do. Memphis says that he wants to stay off the block, and work with him to decide who goes home. Jerry comes right out and says he wants to make a deal with him to go to the final two. Memphis says he’s willing to do that because he “wants to go head to head with the best person in this game, and right now that’s you”. Oh boy. Jerry says he’s going to put up Dan, and that one of them has to win the veto to ensure that Dan stays on the block. “He doesn’t deserve to be here”, Jerry adds.
Memphis agrees with the plan, even saying that he could never trust Dan. Wow, he really is saying everything Jerry wants to hear. Jerry says in the diary room that he is starting to really trust Memphis because he’s never seen him make any promises. “See, I’m not vindictive”, Jerry babbles as Memphis starts to leave the HOH. Memphis says in the diary room that the entire conversation was a farce to “keep the Renegades alive to next week”.
We’re now finally at the end of the show, so we see Jerry read the HOH script and stare at the pictures. Memphis says that he was initially very scared when Jerry won HOH, but now thinks he’s going to “escape” the week. Dan says he’d be “shocked” if he’s not put up, and Keesha and Renny both say something similar. Jerry claims that his decisions are not “personal in nature”; it’s all to “further his game”. Yeah, right.
The first key that Jerry pulls belongs to Renny, and the second key is Memphis. Yes, it’s Keesha and Dan on the block. Jerry says that both of them have nominated him in the past, and that in Dan’s case “it’s a matter of trust”. Keesha was put in because she’s won two HOH’s and a POV. Jerry says in the diary room that his plan is to get Dan out, and that Keesha’s just a pawn. “Renny is very loyal to Keesha. I think she’ll vote to keep Keesha in the house if they play any games with me.”
Dan is happy that it is Renny next to him, as it offers an opportunity for both of them to survive the week. The best case scenario would be for Memphis to win, as “he can take me off” and remain safe. Guess what Keesha said? Yes, it “sucks”, but she’s going to fight. Memphis says that since he has deals with everybody but Renny, the goal is “to get her out of here”. MMMM, we end with a nice shot of Keesha’s lovely cleavage.


Big Brother Season 10, Episode 20 Recap

Ok, I’ll admit that Tuesday’s episode didn’t quite live up to the hype. Blame that on the editing that almost made Michelle look cool, calm, and collected. Tonight then has to be the night where we see seven people go insane, right?
Probably not, as it is double eviction night, which should limit the amount of time available for Ollie and Michelle’s meltdown. You think CBS would have pushed back the festivities if they had any clue what was going to go down? Seriously, they could have spent a whole hour on the reaction to Dan’s silly veto meeting shenanigans.
Here we go! Wow, we are going to see SOME of the explosive action. Ollie speaks first, and this had to be much later in the day as he’s pretty calm as he complains about Dan “disrespecting me and mocking me”. Dan says that it was “my goal to cause utter chaos and confusion by the time the ceremony was over so there would not be a target on my back”. I’m not sure if that plan really worked to achieve that goal.
Jerry still looks confused, but does say in the diary room that “Ollie put a lot of faith in a man that could not keep his word. My plan is to do and say absolutely nothing.” A good plan, if only he would have followed through with it. Well, he did in some respects, as Dan never heard his constant babbling over the next three days.
Michelle is now seen completely losing it. So many words are bleeped that I can’t even follow what she’s saying, other than that Dan is a plant. “Don’t play me like I’m a fucking idiot. I’m sitting in the nomination chair because of roulette? You’re fucking with the wrong person!”
Dan is shown walking outside with Memphis and Keesha, babbling something about if you “make an omelette you have to break some eggs”, while Jerry and Ollie console Michelle. Ollie is convinced that Dan is a plant. “I’m gonna call him out. Let’s do it.”
Ollie heads outside and tells Dan he needs to “tell some stories”. Keesha responds that “I know you two (Ollie and Michelle) turned on me”. Michelle is walking out at that very moment, and goes ballistic. Keesha just laughs and says, “I’d be crazy to be mad at (Dan)”. Michelle adds that Dan’s football picture is fake. Yeah, ok.
Ollie informs everybody of the three-part deal that they already knew about. Dan decides to walk away, and babbles about how those that light fuses never stick around to watch it blow up. Ollie continues to tell the story of the deal. “I was in control this week. I was HOH.” Memphis responds that all he cares about is that he’s off the block, and in the diary room shakes his head at Ollie’s conspiracy theories. (Of course, they don’t show Ollie calling Memphis a faggot.)
Keesha asks if it was supposed to be her on the block if it was up to them. “Pretty much, yeah” replies Ollie. Memphis finally asks Ollie why he doesn’t think they know all this. “I could care less if you knew it or didn’t know it. Just know who you’re working with.”
Ollie now heads upstairs to ask why Dan “played me for a fool”. Dan’s response is that it’s just a game. “If you like to play games, you could have stayed home and played Monopoly. You test my manhood, and you disrespected me in front of millions of people, and you think it’s a game?”
Ollie heads out, and now it’s Renny’s turn to yell at Dan. “Do you honestly think that was all necessary? I’m getting too old for this shit.” They all then watch Ollie toss things around, including candy, a lamp, and some weight gear.
Michelle now comes up, and after being warned that Dan doesn’t want her to yell, repeats over and over “why did you do that to me? Out of all the fucking people, why did you put me up? I’m the only person in this house who hasn’t screwed you.” Oh boy. “It’s not fun getting backdoored for something you didn’t even do.” Come on, Michelle, you’re playing a reality show game. Unfortunately, we don’t get to see her yell at the camera crew to not film her.
We now go to the house, and Julie informs them that it’s double eviction week. Ollie claps for some reason. We head right to the final statements from Jerry and Michelle. Jerry babbles about ups and downs, and if he’s sent away it’s a “bump in the road”. He goes on with more silliness.
Michelle then gets up, and talks about how grateful she is to be here, and once again copies Angie’s speech from over a month ago about voting for your self. Ugh. She claims she loves all of them.
The voting now begins, and Keesha votes to evict Michelle, as does Memphis. Ollie votes to evict Jerry, and a clearly unhappy Renny votes to evict Michelle. It’s 3-1 against Michelle! Thank God!
Julie announces the vote, and Michelle is calm as she hugs only Jerry, Keesha, Renny, and Ollie. Sorry, Dan and Memphis! Ollie runs out to grab some gloves for the HOH, and we quickly return to Michelle. Julie asks why she became the target. Michelle believes that she was targeted the whole time, and repeats the whole plant theory. (Get over it.) “One plus one does not equal two to Dan”? What does that even mean? Julie does a surprisingly great job at deflating her by informing Michelle that Dan was not a plant. “Then he’s crazy.” Julie asks “crazy smart”, and Michelle says no because “he’ll be sitting here in a few minutes”. I suddenly want Dan to win this game.
Oh, and now we learn that Michelle was sent out because he was “petrified” of her. She claims that she’s been “very, very calm”. Oh really? “Dan tried to say he was sorry after, but he can take his sorry and put it you know where.” Now that’s classy. Thankfully, this segment is over.
We move on to the HOH competition, and, as expected, it’s a question competition. The game is “Big Brother Headlines”, and everybody has to pick which house guest viewers chose would fit some phony headlines, and taking a step up or down depending on the answers.
The first “headline” is who America picked “gets lost on his way home from work”. The answers are either Jerry or Keesha. Keesha is the correct answer, and everybody gets a point except Renny. The second question is about comedy tours, and whether it would be Dan or Renny. Renny is the correct answer, and everybody but Memphis gets a point.
The third question is about being a hero for saving a family from a burning building – Dan or Ollie. The correct answer is Dan, and only Jerry gets a point. Next up is who would be entrusted with national security secrets – Jerry or Memphis. Again, everybody but Memphis gets a point. Dammit, Memphis!
Headline five is about whose life story would be a feature film – Jerry or Renny. Renny is the only one with the correct answer this time. The sixth headline is about being arrested by the fashion police – Memphis or Ollie. Jerry and Keesha are the only ones correct this time.
The final “headline” is about beating Jessie in arm wreslting – Dan or Keesha. Good question! Renny, Memphis, and Keesha are the victors. Jerry and Keesha are tied! They have to answer with a number for the final question. Oh god, this is not the right pair for this. How many lollipops were displayed is the question – they both answer 100! The second tie-breaker is if you add the times in “One Giant Leap” is the total time. Jerry guesses 320, and Keesha goes with 500. The correct number is 1,556. Keesha wins!
After commercials, Keesha is asked for nominees, and chooses Jerry and Ollie because the others stood behind her all week. We go right to commercials, and when we return it is time for the veto competition. This one is called veto in a haystack, and the winner is the person who finds two veto medallions the quickest. Ollie leaps ahead of everybody, but Dan finds one first. Renny, Memphis, and Keesha aren’t too far behind. Dan immediately grabs the second one, and wins the veto! I think Ollie may be toast!
We come back to see Keesha and Jerry laughing about having the same guess on the first tie-breaker. Julie rounds them up for the veto meeting. Jerry pleads his case first, but says he “said it all” the first time around but he’s held up with everybody. Ollie spits out a piece of hay before beginning, and babbles that “it is what it is. Dan, you like to play a lot of games. Let’s play another game, and hopefully I’ll be lucky.” Despite appreciating Ollie’s humor, he obviously decides to not use the veto. We see Dan and Memphis walking away as Julie tells us that one of them will be evicted when we return.
We come back to the living room for the voting. Dan votes first, and chooses to evict Ollie. Renny is next, and also votes against Ollie. Memphis is next, and you can guess how he votes. It’s now Jerry against four other people. Ollie knows he’s the one evicted, and sprints out the door before it’s even announced.
As we wait for the interview, we hear Jerry ask that everybody just “talk” to him. “I’ve had no sour grapes, and I never had had them.” Oh really? Too bad we can’t show them some tape from the last few days. “Hell, I could have won the HOH.”
Ollie says he knew when he heard it was 3-0. “It was my turn, I guess.” He complains that he didn’t compete as well as he wanted to. You think? You didn’t win anything! No HOH; no veto. Yet he’s thankful for the opportunity. He admits that he was upset with Dan, but says he was more confused than upset. “I don’t know if that’s the best decision for him.” Ooooh, good question from Julie, as she asks if Dan’s betrayal is any different than what he did to Brian in week one. Somebody please explain to me Ollie’s nonsensical answer. He says he was more upset that he involved everybody in the house in his plan.
After one good question, though, Julie has to jump into TMZ territory by asking about April. Ollie says that he hopes for a “bright future” with the silly girl. “I plan to keep her around as long as I can.”
Wow, we don’t get to see who the new HOH is. I guess I’ll be watching the feeds…if they decide to show them. As we see the final shots of the house, it is simply amazing how Jerry is sucking up to those “terrible” people.