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Sunday, August 30, 2015

Big Brother Season 17, Episode 30 Recap

For the few of you who visited the site on Thursday looking for a recap, I have an explanation. I was in the process of writing one when the skies suddenly opened up for a record-setting downpour. In less than an hour, my little city saw six inches of rain fall. Cars were floating down the streets; a few businesses lost their roofs. It was nuts.

Of course, I was oblivious to this. I was frantically writing until right after the jury house segment began. It was here that our local affiliate began cutting in with weather updates, followed by my cable system's EAS warnings.

Over the course of the last 45 minutes, I saw less than a third of it. I missed Becky showing up at the jury house. I missed John and Steve's speeches, and the votes. I didn't get to see the jurors go back into the house.

I did witness the start of the HOH competition, though, and the few minutes that remained when the feeds came on after the end of the broadcast. Somehow, that sorry example of an "endurance" competition is going to dominate the beginning of tonight's episode. How they'll stretch it out to the usual two segments will be interesting.

So let's get going with the comp. In case you didn't see Thursday's show, it's similar to a season 11 competition. This time, they're standing on small plates attached to a rope. The entire apparatus spins around in a circle that also includes a couple of "Yellow Submarine"-ish giant "hands". Last one standing in the new HOH, and the last juror standing gets to return to the house.

It all starts with Shelli babbling about the "importance" of this competition. Jackie says she's "ready to play". Yeah, they're all basically stating the obvious. Steve doesn't want Jackie's return, though. Liz doesn't want JohnnyMac back because they could be "royally screwed". John says the hands touch him "inappropriately", and Vanessa says this comp is important. See, it's all predictable!

We do get a rule verification here. One foot has to be touching at all times. So shut up with the online petitions.

Clow music then comes on, which of course means it's time for stupid comments from Meg and James.

Austin then babbles about how it's so essential that one of his twins win this competition, and almost immediately Julia drops. Time to start over with the commentary, as Shelli babbles about how tough this competition is. It's supposedly spinning oh so fast. Meg states that even though they're working with the twins and Austin, she needs to do well. We then see Steve and Meg both drop. Shocker! James now thinks he has to win, especially if Shelli returns to the house and comes after him for sending out Clay. Shelli affirms that's exactly what she wants to do (although she has said before it's Vanessa she's after). James then goes into a spin and drops.

At this point, it's nothing but jurors, Liz, and Vanessa in the game. Vanessa is crouched down so low that her ass is on the plate, but both of her feet are firmly in place. Becky is finally seen on camera, which is interesting as we have yet to hear anything from her. Liz then drops.

Jackie's feet then slip down, so she's out. Vanessa is then spinning out of control, and she says she then notices that she's the only non-juror in the comp. "There's no way I'm leaving my fate in their hands." Becky then hits the hand and falls. She claims to be "devastated" as she "gave it my all". Shelli is then out, which means that John is officially coming back to the house. "This is awesome. Now I just got to win HOH." For some reason, well for obvious reasons for anybody who didn't watch the competition live, we head to commercials.

Just in case you forgot, we're now reminded that it's between John and Vanessa for HOH. Austin is nervous. Vanessa tells John that she really wants a letter from her girlfriend, but he says he has "business" to take care of. John then informs us that right before his eviction, he made up with Vanessa. After a flashback, he says that the rest of the house can't know about this so he refuses her deal. He hasn't received a letter, but Vanessa reaffirms that he's safe. He then drops, making Vanessa the new HOH! (BTW, despite what she complains about later, Meg does hug her.)

They all head inside, and Liz is pissed. She heads into the have-not room with Austin to bitch about what John was saying during the competition. "He is absolutely going after Austin and I", says Liz. John is joking around in the kitchen as Julia joins the bitchfest in the bedroom. "He has a vengence towards us for no reason", says Liz. Um, nominating and eviction is not a reason? They all want Vanessa to re-nominate him.

Vanessa then goes into the lounge to relax, and says that she's "happy" to the camera. She thinks this is a "reset" that will allow her to "redraw the lines". James, though, is stressed because he doesn't know how close she is to Austin and the twins. Really? He tells Meg that he wants Vanessa to go after those three. "She might just come to us randomly." Well, she won't.

Steve and John then reunite, and do a stupid air guitar thing. John says that he feels safe, and a super-excited Steve agrees. He's a bit worried, though, that people will think they're working together again. They decide to not be seen again.

Vanessa then enters after Steve leaves, and John (stupidly) admits that he did fall in the comp. Why give her a reason to go back on her deal? Luckily, she says that he's still safe. "Let's take these people out." They hug, and Vanessa explains that she has finally realized she's the bottom person in the Austwins alliance. Vanessa says that they also have to pretend like they have no deal.

In the bathroom, Austin is now whining to Vanessa about John's return. He's still all fired up about John's "shot" at him, and Vanessa says she's going to do what's best for her. Steve joins them, and says "we're the Detonators of this season". There's a flashback of Steve apologizing to Vanessa from earlier in the week. When Austin leaves, Vanessa says that she wants his "strategic input". Steve is a bit paranoid about it, but she reassures him that she wants to do what is best for the "three of us" (Vanessa, Steve, John). Vanessa wants to target James, but wants more intel on Austin's plans.

Filler time after commercials as we have to endure Meg. Fast forward time. I can't deal with Grandma Meg.

Oh god, even more filler as we have to see Vanessa's HOH room reveal.

Back to the game - Vanessa is now whining to Austin and Liz that Meg didn't congratulate her after her HOH room. She needs to do what's good for her game, and it's now John. She wants to target James and Meg, and we go back to Thursday morning when the pair attempted to switch the eviction to Steve instead of John. Vanessa tells them about this talk. Well, she gives her own personal spin. She tells them that James said, "I love the girls and Austin, but it is a game." It immediately works on Liz, who says they've ridden on their coattails for the last two weeks. "I feel fooled by them, and I want them out", she says. Oh, you silly twit.

If you're still watching, you're going ot want a barf bag. They filled this segment with footage from last Sunday night. Liz and Austin had a "date", and he officially asked her to be his girlfriend. Gross. Gross. Gross.

There's even more filler, as Julia is now trying to prank Austin. Fast forward.

Ok, back to the game. Meg and James go up to talk to Vanessa, who wants to pump them for information about Austin. Yeah, this won't go well. Vanessa tells them that her mind is open to big moves, but she needs some information. There's an awkward silence, so Vanessa moves on to how she was the target the previous week. Meg denies knowing anything about this. Yep, that's pretty stupid of them, so Vanessa moves on to pawn talk. She claims to want to put out John, so would either of them be pawns. James then says that if one of them has to be a pawn, he will volunteer. Meg says "no", and starts to cry. "Put me up before him." Vanessa can't believe what she's seeing. "You all are nuts." This is giving them even more reason to put them up, as they're acting like a married couple. James then says that next week he'll be willing to put up Austin and the twins, but Vanessa complains in the diary room that they didn't give her any reason for HER to do just that this week.

Back downstairs, Meg and James giggle about the chat they just had. They think they did well, and James says he'd be shocked if the two of them go up. He also doesn't think Vanessa is as close to Asutin and the twins as they originally thought, and will keep them so that they do her dirty work next week. Oh my, these two are so clueless.

We're almost finished her, but in the last seconds before nominations James suddenly remembers a deal he had with Vanessa from weeks ago. We get the flashback to that moment from day 44. Stupidly, though, instead of racing upstairs to remind her, they decide not to just in case they weren't going to be going up. They certainly don't want to piss her off, you know. Stupidest move of the game, and competely representative of Meg's game. Dummies. Big dummies.

So it's time for nominations. Vanessa had spent the day practicing this "epic" nomination speech she was going to give, so I'm expecting something ridiculous. Everybody has their little diary room moments on what they expect and what they hope doesn't happen before they're all called in for the ceremony. Yep, the nominees are Meg and James. "This couldn't be farther from personal. It's a game move. If nothing else, it's a chess move. Unfortunately for you guys, it's my move now, and as anybody who has played chess with me would know, I won't hesitate to put a King in check and a King isn't worth much without his Queen." Um, ok. She spent all day for that?

Meg says she feels "super game is falling apart". Well, you had no game. Austin says they're getting what's deserved. Vanessa talks about he "side alliance" with John and Steve. "I'm sorry, James and Meg." Of course, James regrets not telling Vanessa about their deal.

That's it. What did you think? Are you feeling ok after that Austin/Liz date? Let us know what you're thinking!


  1. The date was super awkward to watch on the feeds, so at least they cute some of the awkwardness out. I'm surprised that they didn't show Liz saying he needed to break up with the old girlfriend first. I know the chick didn't sign a release, but it isn't like no one has spoken about her.

    My favorite line of your whole post: Oh, you silly twit.

    Vanessa so easily manipulated the Austwins. Granted, they seem very easy to sway.

  2. Guess I'm lucky I ff through the date last night.

  3. That convo perfectly represented why I hate those two. Ever since John became their target, all those two could say was how much they hate him and how weird he is, blah blah blah. Then after getting "misted" by Vanessa, they liked John again but it's Meg and James they hate and think are weird. James is a "little Napoleon guy", Meg is stupid, etc.

  4. Here's a longer piece of audio of the awful "date". Some of it has been edited out, as Austin is as bad as Vanessa at extending convos longer than necessary. But this does include Liz bringing up Austin's girlfriend.

  5. I must be watching Big Brother-Planet Mars edition. I've watched every episode this season and the only person playing anything that resembles a " game"is Vanessa. She has played everyone since day one. I see people playing games. I'm waiting for James to start sneaking up from behind on the remaining house guests and start pulling their pants down.
    The producers need to take a cue from Survivor when it comes HOH comps. They could have the house guests eat roaches or worms or even mice testicles. DO SOMETHING TO MAKE IT INTERESTING!!! Then again, Vanessa would probably win those comps also. A note to SUPERFAN STEVE: When you talk move your hands and arms up and down a little harder so you can fly away and disappear.