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Sunday, July 26, 2015

Big Brother Season 17, Episode 15 Recap

Once again, I'm back!!!! I was out on the road with one of my favorite artists, Lydia Loveless, assisting my friend Gorman Bechard create a documentary about her next record. My travels are now completed, so you're stuck with me the rest of the season. I also must thank John (@uselesstraffic) for sitting in with me on the last couple of episodes.

BTW, here's an audience clip from a couple of the shows I attended:

Honestly, I'm not expecting much out of tonight's episode, as there is bound to be way too much Jackie for my taste. Yet I'm intrigued to find out just how much of the broadcast will be a direct copy of last night's Big Brother Gossip Show. The last few episodes have been direct copies, outside of diary room chatter and competitions, so I will not be shocked to once again see the same clips as we aired.

We begin the evening with the aftermath of Jacky and Vanessa's HOH wins. Jackie speaks and my ears bleed. She's apparently a "queen", while Vanessa trots out her favorite phrase about not wanting to get "blood on my hands". She's happy she's the second HOH, though, as Jacky would have probably targeted her since she was responsible for Jeff's departure.

Austin pulls together a couple of chairs to do some working out, and an otherwise quiet Clay, James and John start talking about how the girls have been rolling all over them. "We're just little minions underneath their heels", says Clay. They all predict that a guy will be going home this week, but all Austin cares about is ensuring the twins remain safe as they get to officially enter the house next Thursday.

We then go back to the previous day when Austin stupidly announced to Liz his "Operation Jason". As I predicted they'd show on last night's Big Brother Gossip Show, Austin has this plan to tell Jason everything about the twins.

But first, we have to watch the pair trade off, and Julia freaks out when Liz says that Austin tried to kiss her. "I didn't." Julia complains that she's a heartbreaker, and then Liz fills him on this idiotic Operation Jason plan. "I don't think that's a good idea", says Julia. Neither do we.

So then we get to see Austin make his godawful move. Jason says he has known all along, and laughs in the diary room that confirming this to him is not a good move for him. He also says that he is falling for Liz, but is not a big fan of Julia. He's hoping that Julia doesn't make it to jury.

Jason then crawls into bed with Meg, and tells her the whole story. "He likes one, but doesn't like the other." Julia then walks through the room, and then Jason finished the story. The next morning, the pair tell Shelli everything Austin told Jason. To say the least, Shelli is not happy. "That was our listtle secret, man!"

Vanessa then walks into the bathroom, and she is filled in on everything Austin told Jason. Yep, she's not happy either. I tried to slow down her diary room conversation, but the meds had clearly kicked in. Let's just say that it was about the fact that having both twins gives them an extra number in their alliance. "That's like selling out your alliance, and I'm not ok with that.'

Shelli now runs upstairs to tell Clay. Can I remind you again that we're still covering things from the day before Vanessa and Jacky won HOH? This all could have perfectly fit into Thursday's show if they hadn't wasted so much time on Audrey's family and an interview with Britney. Clay, Shelli, and Vanessa just go round and round with the Austin situation, and they think they should tell Julia.

Now we are finally back to the "present", and Vanessa and Jacky are still babbling. Vanessa hopes the two can find some "common ground", and again we get the exact same clips we played last night. *sigh* Just go listen to the show instead of expecting me to transcribe the conversation. They both talked about who they want to nominate, and Austin and Liz's names come up.

Thankfully, we get commercials...but we come back to the insipid "who wants to see my HOH room" dullness. Bathroom time!

Back to the game. Vanessa is complaining to Austin that she doesn't want to be HOH this week, and in the diary room she says she has to be "100% sure" before she can backdoor him. She asks him what he said to Jason, and Austin completely lies. (Again, straight from our show.) Vanessa is pissed. "Don't lie to me or I'm going to be pissed."

James then comes into the HOH...but it's only to tell Vanessa that her mom is hot. "Too bad she's married." Why did they show this? Vanessa then carries on, telling Austin that they have to hide the fact that they're working together for Jacky's sake. When he leaves, she tells the camera "there it is. He just lied to me." His love of Liz is "clouding his judgment".

Now Julia is in the HOH. She knows that Jacky is going to put her up, but Vanessa says there's no way that she's going home. Vanessa also tells her that Austin isn't "acting very clearly". Julia confirms that Liz doesn't want Austin, so Vanessa again tells the story about Austin talking to Jason. I guess CBS watchers now understand how difficult it is to endure Vanessa's constant retells of the same stories. Now Julia is pissed. "She doesn't even like youuuuuu, so the jokes on youuuuuu."

Time for more adverts! When we return, Vanessa's "favorites" (Clay and Shelli) come in, and we get the retell of Austin's lie to Vanessa. Wow, this episode stinks. Jacky then comes in, and Vanessa says that she wants Jacky to remain HOH. Jacky's idea is to go after Liz, and if it doesn't work then it will be the opportunity to backdoor Austin. They then discuss who else is be to put up as noms, and Clay volunteers to go up with Becky. What a dummy. Becky is then summoned, and she agrees.

But who will be put up with Liz as a pawn? Jason, Meg, and James are brought up, and Vanessa says that Austin betrayed her. She also sort of verifies the existence of the twins. The idea is that it would be best for Austin to go home first, and then go after the twins. The three are told that Austin can't be told about this plan. Jason and Meg like the "concept", but they really don't want to be nominated (plus Jason says he just can't throw a competition). James is then talked into doing it, mainly because he can't say no to a girl.

Time for even more commercials, Austin comes into the HOH, and Vanessa tells him that Jacky is putting up Liz, but the plan is to get rid of Steve. She also says that she's going to talk Clay into volunteering to go up with Becky. "Why wouldn't she put Steve straight up?" Good question. Austin says the "hero in me" wants to go up on the other side and throw it for Liz. "That's stupid", says Vanessa.

It's finally nomination time, but we all know what's going to happen (even if you just watch this episode). Jacky goes first, and nominated James and Liz (aka Julia). Jacky says it's because both of them have previously nominated her. Vanessa then nominates Clay and Becky. She says it's because Clay hasn't been nominated yet, and it's just a "game move" when it comes to Becky. Austin, of course, is worried about Julie. Johnny, though, is so happy to NOT be nominated for the first time this season. "What do I do with myself? Do I just sit here?"

Upstairs, Vanessa informs Julia that she's not the target. "I adore you."

Julia is then sent to the diary room to make her switch, and she says she has decided not to tell Liz about the Austin situation so that she doesn't screw up BOB. Liz is told, obviously, that she is nominated. Julia can't help but throw a dig in about Austin though. He's a "scary creep".

Back up in the HOH, Shelli comes in to talk to Jacky and Vanessa. "Seeing (Clay's) face on the wall made me want to vomit", she bitches. Vanessa reassures her that this is the best case scenario. And again, we get a "pool of blood" line from Vanessa.

Finally, it's BOB time, and the memory wall lights up with last year's cast. Ugh, why remind us of that mess? They head outside to the "BB news room". They have to throw paint at items in the "news room", which will give them letters to use to spell out cast members from last year.

So "Splashy Headlines" begin after dumb diary room scriptreading, including another "blood on my hands" from Vanessa. Let's just sum up what happened. James tried to throw it, but Clay and Becky are so stupid that they still couldn't win. Liz kicked ass, and basically won it all by herself. All of the best plans were led astray, and Vanessa remains as HOH with Clay and Becky as this week's nominees.

That's it! What did you think of the episode? Are you happy that not everything went as planned for Vanessa and Jacky? What about Austin's silliness? Comment it out! Do it! Now!

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